Auntdot, thankfully neither I or any of the other Chef's don't have to really deal with the guests unless they have requests that the Catering or Banquet Managers don't have the answers for, and it looks like there will be continuous back and forth questions from the guests. Usually, the Catering Manager sets the menu along with the guest and they'll ask us if the guest has any special requests that we may have challenges accomodating.
If they are having a function in the restaurant, usually the restaurant manager, the Director of F&B, or Assist. Dir of F&B will speak with the guest directly and arrange the menu. Most people with parties of 40 or more opt for a banquet room because the tables can be arranged more to their liking. If they have it in the restaurant, they are more or less at the mercy of the restaurant's floor plan. We can move stuff around to a point but if it gets really out of hand, we'll make the guest buy out the entire restaurant because it will impact the other diners. They usually then opt for the banquet room since it will cost more to buy out the restaurant at that point.
"Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it."
Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe