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View Poll Results: How do you determine what each diner pays when you go out to eat as part of a group?
Each diner/couple pays an equal share 9 22.50%
Each diner/couple pays for exactly what they ate or drank 12 30.00%
Each diner/couple pays for approximately what they ate or drank 11 27.50%
One person pays the whole tab. 2 5.00%
Other (please explain) 6 15.00%
Voters: 40. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 07-25-2006, 11:26 PM   #1
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Restaurant Check Splitting

When you go out to dinner as part of a group or with a friend, how do you handle the calculation of how much each person pays?

Let's assume this is not a 'thank you' dinner where you would pay it all. Just a group of folks who agreed to get together for a meal.
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Old 07-26-2006, 12:23 AM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Andy M.
When you go out to dinner as part of a group or with a friend, how do you handle the calculation of how much each person pays?
I put that each pays for their own and leaves their own tip. However, the exception to that is if I've invited the couple as a way of thanking them for some act of kindness they've did for me........then I foot the bill & tip.
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Old 07-26-2006, 12:38 AM   #3
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i voted "other" because there's so many different situations that require different tactful handing of the situation.

if you have invited someone, be it guests, relatives, or another couple for any special or even non-specific occasion, the you foot the bill.

if you have been invited as such, you should offer to pay your share, expecting to be refuted, but you should be humbly ready and able to oblige your offer. insist on paying your share, to allow the host to save face and be gracious. but don't make a scene
now remember, you said humbly...

any other gatherings. like of couples/families where it is a simple get together for no particular reason, then the bill is split evenly, no matter who had the lobster, who polished off the wine, and who ordered the baked alaska.

if any part of the experience pisses you off, chalk it up to experience and never dine with them again (until you can get your full retribution...mwahahahaha)
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Old 07-26-2006, 01:18 AM   #4
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I voted other because in England we tend to do the divide the whole bill into the number of diners thing, in Australia we tend to sit with a piece of paper a pen and a calculator and work the thing out!!!
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Old 07-26-2006, 01:43 AM   #5
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Everyone pays for their own exactly.
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Old 07-26-2006, 01:51 AM   #6
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wow, that's interesting to me kyles.

here, the paying of the check has always been a sort of power play/social juggling act.

i've been to dinners out where one couple wanted to calculate their share, and pay their own tip. it always becomes akward after that, causing the rest of the group to try to make up the difference. no one wants to, so when i take over, my wife gets upset that we always end up getting stuck. (so i make sure to order the white truffle stuffed saffron enfused jumbo african lobster tails ).

often non-alcohol drinkers will have a problem with the system, so it is often agreed to before hand to have seperate checks for food and alcohol. that's ok with me.
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Old 07-26-2006, 01:56 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by buckytom

i've been to dinners out where one couple wanted to calculate their share, and pay their own tip. it always becomes akward after that, causing the rest of the group to try to make up the difference.
I don't really understand what you mean by that. How does everyone else have to make up the difference?
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Old 07-26-2006, 02:17 AM   #8
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ok, well, like i said, it's usually a loose agreement when several couples dine together that the check will be split evenly: if the bill is $500, and there's five couples, it's a hundred a piece, plus tip.

let's say andy m. and his s.o. felt that they only had the chicken specials, "house" instead of fancy salads, no oysters, and only coffee after dinner, andy would then only put up $60 bucks to cover his share plus a measly tip, and quickly take off to the front door where the valet awaits with his ferrari .
welll, the other couples are forced to put in the $40 +tip that andy refused to pay. you could leave it out, blaming him, but the wait staff ends up suffering as that $$$ usually ends up coming out of the tip. then you all look bad.

so i've learned, after dealing with people like him (disclaimer:andy m. has only been used as an example in this scenario. the fact that andy may be cheap is entirely up to him...sorry man...this is too funny to resist), i've found that you need to be willing to agree to make the arrangements when you make the date (awkward at best), or be willing to suffer the consequences (more costly but less awkward if done with class).

if you're really in with a bunch of skin flints, pay your minimal way, then go back and tip the waitstaff personally.
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Old 07-26-2006, 02:31 AM   #9
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I agree separate checks for each couple. We had "friends" who always insisted on splitting the check...the only thing they had several drinks and we didn't, so we were always overpaying. After a few times of this, I told dh I would not go to dinner with them at all. I would really like to know what the thinking would be from someone who did this. Were we being suckers? If they considered us friends, why would they do that to us? Why would anyone think it is ok for one couple to subsidize another couple in such a way? Of course, if we invite someone to dinner, we pay all unless it is a situation where we just meet people and all pay our share. We had a rather strange situation once with someone we ate with and he put the meal on company charge card, but we paid him in cash. I thought that was very tacky, to say nothing of being dishonest. We were not clients.
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Old 07-26-2006, 02:42 AM   #10
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BT, I still don't understand what you are saying. If Andy pays his part of the bill and it is 60, why should he put in extra 40 just because you ate the white truffle stuff? Are you the guy we ate with and split the bill? I have NO problem splitting the bill if everyone has about the same thing, but that isn't usually the case. There is usually a "big spender" in the bunch who comes up with the idea of splitting the bill evenly when he ordered the whole shebang and others may not have. Why would I expect someone else to pick up part of my tab if I ordered much more than they? I don't care how part of the world does it, I don't like it and don't pay it. And the word "skinflint" certainly doesn't apply to this situation. I can't think of a polite word to use for the person who expects others to overcompensate for him.
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