Kitchen Disasters

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I had set some chicken stock on the stove to simmer while I went to work. No problem, husband and kids were at home. But, dear hubby decided to bring the kids to the mall where I worked at the time, took them to a movie, stopped by the store where i was working so they could say "hi." Well, when he got home, smoke had filled the house. He turned the burner on high instead of off, melted the aluminum right off the bottom of the stock pot. Luckily, that was the only damage.
Another time, I was making green chili. Well, dear hubby doesn't like it chunky, so I put it in the blender, hot. When I took the lid off, it exploded out of the blender and burned my forearm, had to go the emergency room. It took the top layer of skin off from my elbow to the wrist.
yikes! NEVER PUT HOT LIQUIDS IN A CLOSED BLENDER!!!!!
 
There are so many of these and they are fun, and I run the risk of repeating myself, so excuse me if I do. I was visiting a boyfriend at his bachelor quarters. Even then I was a fairly accomplished cook, so ... well, you tell me. All I was doing was heating a frozen pizza. A real no-brainer, right? Well I grabbed what I thought was a pizza pan from the drawer under the oven to use for the purpose, and of course it wasn't metal, it caught on fire, and it was one of his room-mates antiques. I freaked; I didn't know. It looked like a plain old metal plate, and was stored with the pizza pans and cookie trays, etc. How was I to know? Our relationshiip was doomed anyway, but burning his room-mate's antique pewter something-or-other probably didn't help!
 
breaking my arm in two places after slipping on wet ceramic .... and yes that was today
 
Haha! My worst kitchen disaster has nothing to do with food but it did happen in the kitchen. I bought hair removal wax which you pop into the microwave for 1minute and then it is melted and ready to use. My microwave at uni took exactly 1 minute and then you could stir the wax for a bit and then only would it melt the rest.
But then I shoved it into my mum's fancy new microwave. I walked away for a couple of seconds. When I returned, less than 45 seconds later everything melted away...including the container. It was such a mess to clean - you have no idea!

I've realized that any time I try to do something with the microwave that doesn't include food items, like melting wax, etc. I tend to have a disaster on my hands. The only thing I've managed is warmingup wet washcloths to use as a warm compress. Other than that, I don't put non-food items in the microwave.
 
Another time, I was making green chili. Well, dear hubby doesn't like it chunky, so I put it in the blender, hot. When I took the lid off, it exploded out of the blender and burned my forearm, had to go the emergency room. It took the top layer of skin off from my elbow to the wrist.
yikes! NEVER PUT HOT LIQUIDS IN A CLOSED BLENDER!!!!!

Ow, I concur! I learned that lesson long ago...and never take the top off the pressure cooker before it's completely done un-pressurizing.
 
I made garlic butter to go with some prawns i'd bought, and was so proud that i kept lifting the pan to smell it.

Anyway, i lift the pan, and don't get a great whiff, so i bring the pan closer, failing to realise that my face happens to have a chin and my chin was in the way and also failing to realise how hot the pan was.


So, needless to say i burned myself on the chin and walked round looking like an idiot until it cleared up. And because it was right in the middle of my face, everyone kept asking how i'd done it! D'oh!!
 
While helping a friend move I was unpacking her kitchen items. I put the whole stack of plastic lids that fit her matched containers on the stove. It was a gas stove and the heat from the pilot light was enough to turn all her lids into a paper weight.

The next payday I went out and bought her another set of matched containers.
 
My worst kitchen disaster: Well i remember, I had prepared the tea once for myself and after my mother woke up she just asked me how did i filter the tea, then I just remember, I did not filter the tea at all. There are more instances when I had cooked some dishes and I had put an excessive salt in the dishes thereby spoiling them all
 
today i made ny bread. noticed my yeast said nov. i pushed it anyway. it rose as it should. however when baked the crust is way to hard and the loaf fairly flat. gonna dip in french onion soup anyway.

all that work for lousy bread.
 
Chicken enchiladas ala floor.

I was makeing some green enchilada sauce from a recipe that was really a pain.Every ingrediant was fresh and it also seemed to include every thing you could ever think of.Word to the wise, the blade on your blender goes inside of the screw on base not the other way around.I made it half way to my pot before the bottom fell out.What a mess and a great memory.
 
I almost burned down my kitchen on New Year's Day. I placed a plastic & rubber coated stainless steel bowl (OXO) in the oven to warm up the plastic so it can be peeled off easily from the outer shell of the bowl. (The pastic was partially melted from my wife placing this bowl next to the hot stove several days prior so I wanted to remove the rest of it by softening it in the oven)
I left it in the oven and went to check my email thinking I'll come back in a couple of minutes. That never happened.
About 15 minutes later I smelled this awful, toxic fume in the house. I panicked, ran into the kitchen and saw heavy black smoke pouring out of the oven door.
I made the mistake of opening the oven door. It fed fresh oxygen and a huge 3 foot wide ball of flame shot out of the oven and shot straight up to the top of our 15ft kitchen ceiling, blackening the entire side of the wall. It singed part of my eyelashes.
For the next hour I couldn't open the oven door as flames kept shooting out every time I tried to crack open the oven door. During that time I had a fire extinguisher in place and buckets of water just in case.
I just waited it out till the oven cooled. The oven was ruined. It was covered with toxic crap and still is. The inner insulating glass cracked. I felt very bad.

I was very stupid that morning. I could have been badly burned. I haven't been that frightened since the Northridge quake of '94 when I thought the whole house was going to come down. Yes, I was stupid that morning. Boy, was I stupid.
 
decorative rice

my worst recent disaster was when my husband and I were cooking a Mexican dinner for his brother and sister-in-law. I always make rice in the microwave. Her microwave is obviously much more high power than mine - and I got distracted. When I took the rice out - it had all piled up on the sides of the Corning-ware dish and hardened into a dried pile of brown crunch. We laughed - pulled it out of the dish, put little, red, dried chile peppers on top for decoration and set a red candle in the middle of it - made a great candle ring to decorate the table.
 
I am not sure what counts as the worst, but I've had a few bad ones:

I was trying to bake a turkey wing in a glass pan for a past girlfriend and was trying to check and see if it was done. I was afraid it was drying out so I took a glass of cold water and poured it into the hot glass pan. The entire pan disintegrated into tiny glass cubes all over the oven!

I was frying myself a burger and decided I wanted lemon juice and pepper on it. I proceeded to pour the lemon juice onto the burger and suddenly the oil in the pan erupted into flames that seemed as high as the ceiling. I quickly grabbed the nearest lid and clasped it over the pan. I can't remember if my burger was okay or not. :)

I think most vegans who want brownies come across this one: I looked at the ingredients on a box of brownie mix and noticed it contained all vegan ingredients -- any eggs or milk was to be added later by the consumer. "Cool", I thought. "I will just take some Ener-G Egg Replacer (basically tapioca starch) and use it for the egg substitute." I used the egg replacer powder for the eggs and put it in the oven. When it came out of the oven, the chocolate flour part was literally as hard as a rock and it was floating in this sea of water and oil! Most inedible brownies ever! Trust me, I tried! I've since looked up some actual recipes for vegan brownies. :)

Once, when working at KFC, I was washing dishes and had two large piles of dishes piled very high on both of my clean breading stations. I stood between the two tables and began to slip on the wet floor, so I grabbed onto one pile of dishes to stablize myself. The pile began to tilt and I began to slip some more, so I grabbed the other pile of dishes. Suddenly, it was me on my butt and all the dishes on the floor in one huge crash!

I've set the fryers on fire a few times working at KFC by accidentally leaving them on after I drained the oil. Fortunately, I know how to put out a fire too!
 
My most memorable kitchen disaster occured when my wife's WHOLE FAMILY was over for mother's day, Memorial day, something big holiday like that. The whole family gets together for these events. I had recently gotten a large container of Emeril's Essence from Sams Club, so I decided to use it as a rub for the chicken I was grilling for the 20+ people at my house. I went WAY overboard on the spice amount. I basically coated the chicken in the Essence, and no one could eat it. Since then I have noticed that when Emeril uses it he takes a pinch and BAMs it on the top of the dish. All has been forgiven though, the family has gladly eaten everything I have cooked since then!
More recently though I was frying up some tortilla chips, and as I was turning them over my spring loaded tongs slipped in my hand and snapped open. Oil splashed on me and my wife, who was standing next to me washing dishes. I wasn't burned too bad, but some got on her bare arm. Not fun! Good to keep some aloe in the kitchen along with that fire extinguisher!
 
I broiled a bundt cake!! This was a classic air-head moment. When I preheated the oven, I specifically checked that both knobs were on broil. (Oven had issues so it was important to be precise!!) I just wasn't thinking. I knew how to bake a cake!! I was just rushing and not thinking.

The funniest part was that my parents were downstairs eating (right next to the oven). My husband and I were upstairs. We smelled the smoke and were wondering what my parents were doing. We went downstairs and they were just sitting there, completely oblivious to what was going on. My husband opened the oven door and thick, black smoke poured out. He slammed the oven door shut and said, "What the h*ll is in there?!" I told him it was a bundt cake...I made it as a surprise! :LOL: He opened the front door, then opened the oven and ran with the cake...throwing it outside. It landed in a snowbank. I will never forget the sizzling sound it made as it melted into the snowbank! (This happened about 17 years ago!)

The next day, my dad retrieved the cake. It was completely black...like charcoal. He wrapped it in plastic wrap and left it on the kitchen counter for days, offering it to everyone who visted. (A nice joke at my expense!!)

About a week later, my dad spread peanut butter all over it, tied a rope to it and hung it on the tree outside the kitchen window for the birds. They loved it. (It looked like a tire swing.) They pecked at it for weeks before it finally broke apart and fell to the ground.
 
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