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Old 06-14-2012, 03:56 PM   #1
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The Perils of Chief Longwind

Imagine if you will a deep and dark blue indoor/outdoor carpet, set in a dining room, with a fairly standard dining room table sitting on it. Now imagine this guy who thinks he knows how to cook making a poolish on the kitchen table, and when done, placing that poolish in a gallon-sized zip lock bag, then removing all the air from that bag. Sounds OK so far.

Now imagine that the guy who thinks he can cook is going to be late for work if he doesn't hustle and get out the door. So he lifts the bag full of poolish and sets it on the dining room table, seemingly far enough from the edge to not fall off.

He goes to work from 8 to 11 a. today because he's taking flex time for extra hours put in on Monday and Tuesday. He plans on checking the poolish when he gets home, and turning it into bread dough, to be refrigerated and used on Saturday.

Now you all have this picture in your head, right? Ok, my DW has a crafting class she's attending. So I figure I'll go in and give her a ride home when she's done. I ended up staying there a couple hours, helping various folk with their projects. I punch holes through leather, help run beads onto lines, and just provide general support. We didn't get out of there until about 2 p.m. But it's not over yet.

DW broke another person's needle-nose pliers, so we had to go to a sewing shop to get a replacement pair. And of course, there is no store ever created that my DW doesn't get stuck in, whether she's planning on purchasing anything or not. But she always does spend money. She can't help herself.

Finally she's ready to go. It's 3:00 p.m. We drive home and she has a full grown tomato plant, in a pot, and the pliers to deliver to the lady who runs the crafting shop. I go to check my poolish.

Horror! It outgrew its space on the table, and drooped over the edge until it fell to the carpeted floor. Of course it broke its seal and left about half a cup of poolish on my carpet. Now if you drop a piece of cheese on this carpet, you simply pick it up. If you spill milk, the weave is dense enough that you have plenty of time to get a towel, or paper towel to blot the milk with before it soaks into the carpet. But poolish, well it just sticks like glue. You have to get it very wet, liquify it, then blot it up for about ten minutes. Then you have to scrub the carpet with fresh water to remove any stuck on gluten.

Fortunately, the bag landed in such a way that the poolish wasn't contaminated. I added enough additional flour, with a little cooking oil, to make enough bread dough for a good sized loaf of bread. That dough is now sitting safely in the fridge, waiting to be wrapped around hot dogs on Saturday.

Moral of the story, don't spill your poolish on the carpet. It's a very foolish thing to spill poollish on the carpet.

Seeeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North

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Old 06-14-2012, 04:04 PM   #2
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And spillage is the reason we have tile floors!
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Emeralds are real Gems! C. caninus & C. Batesii.
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Old 06-14-2012, 04:47 PM   #3
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And spillage is the reason we have tile floors!
In response to your tag line at the end; Emeralds are real gems, but saphires and rubies are easier to work with due to them being heat resistant and a hardness second only to diamond in the natural world. I love working with saphires, but setting faceted stones with your own basket creations is a real challenge. Still trying to figure out how to make strong, but delicate looking prongs to hold the stone in the setting, all sterling silver of course. Stone shape is like a canoe, about 9 mm long by 3 mm wide. Pretty, and pretty difficult. Star sapphire or star ruby could be treated like a cabochon and secured with a decorative bezel. Alas, I have no star sapphires to work with.

Seeeeeeya; Chief Longwind of North
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Old 06-14-2012, 05:40 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chief Longwind Of The North View Post
Imagine if you will a deep and dark blue indoor/outdoor carpet, set in a dining room, with a fairly standard dining room table sitting on it. Now imagine this guy who thinks he knows how to cook making a poolish on the kitchen table, and when done, placing that poolish in a gallon-sized zip lock bag, then removing all the air from that bag. Sounds OK so far.

Now imagine that the guy who thinks he can cook is going to be late for work if he doesn't hustle and get out the door. So he lifts the bag full of poolish and sets it on the dining room table, seemingly far enough from the edge to not fall off.

He goes to work from 8 to 11 a. today because he's taking flex time for extra hours put in on Monday and Tuesday. He plans on checking the poolish when he gets home, and turning it into bread dough, to be refrigerated and used on Saturday.

Now you all have this picture in your head, right? Ok, my DW has a crafting class she's attending. So I figure I'll go in and give her a ride home when she's done. I ended up staying there a couple hours, helping various folk with their projects. I punch holes through leather, help run beads onto lines, and just provide general support. We didn't get out of there until about 2 p.m. But it's not over yet.

DW broke another person's needle-nose pliers, so we had to go to a sewing shop to get a replacement pair. And of course, there is no store ever created that my DW doesn't get stuck in, whether she's planning on purchasing anything or not. But she always does spend money. She can't help herself.

Finally she's ready to go. It's 3:00 p.m. We drive home and she has a full grown tomato plant, in a pot, and the pliers to deliver to the lady who runs the crafting shop. I go to check my poolish.

Horror! It outgrew its space on the table, and drooped over the edge until it fell to the carpeted floor. Of course it broke its seal and left about half a cup of poolish on my carpet. Now if you drop a piece of cheese on this carpet, you simply pick it up. If you spill milk, the weave is dense enough that you have plenty of time to get a towel, or paper towel to blot the milk with before it soaks into the carpet. But poolish, well it just sticks like glue. You have to get it very wet, liquify it, then blot it up for about ten minutes. Then you have to scrub the carpet with fresh water to remove any stuck on gluten.

Fortunately, the bag landed in such a way that the poolish wasn't contaminated. I added enough additional flour, with a little cooking oil, to make enough bread dough for a good sized loaf of bread. That dough is now sitting safely in the fridge, waiting to be wrapped around hot dogs on Saturday.

Moral of the story, don't spill your poolish on the carpet. It's a very foolish thing to spill poollish on the carpet.

Seeeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North
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Old 06-14-2012, 05:45 PM   #5
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Too funny! Reminds me of the movie, "The Blob!"
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Old 06-14-2012, 07:06 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chief Longwind Of The North View Post
In response to your tag line at the end; Emeralds are real gems, but saphires and rubies are easier to work with due to them being heat resistant and a hardness second only to diamond in the natural world. I love working with saphires, but setting faceted stones with your own basket creations is a real challenge. Still trying to figure out how to make strong, but delicate looking prongs to hold the stone in the setting, all sterling silver of course. Stone shape is like a canoe, about 9 mm long by 3 mm wide. Pretty, and pretty difficult. Star sapphire or star ruby could be treated like a cabochon and secured with a decorative bezel. Alas, I have no star sapphires to work with.

Seeeeeeya; Chief Longwind of North
Umm, in my case, note the C. Caninus and C. Batesii which refer to genus Corallus and the two species of Emerald Tree Boa, Northern and Amazon Basin, respectively. They are both truely Gems of the Rainforest!
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Old 06-14-2012, 07:06 PM   #7
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Chief, I feel for you. I once made pizza dough for 30 youth and put it in the fridge to hold it until I was ready to go to make it for youth group that night. It went into three packets, all in large freezer ziplock bags. I went out to purchase the toppings and a few other errands.

When I came home my husband meets me at the door and says "go look in the fridge" in a very befuddled tone (no hi you are ya!). I got to the fridge. I don't even have to open it. There is pizza dough oozing out through the seal from when he opened it. I finally got up the courage and saw all three bags split open and pizza dough EVERYWHERE. It wasn't supposed to rise anymore once it was in the fridge but no one told it that. While I quickly made more DH cleaned out the fridge - it surrounded bottles on the door, anything and everything that was on the shelves and even seeped into one of the crispers - anyone like lettuce on their pizza?

I hope your bread on Saturday is the best you have ever made! It would go great with some Balderson 7 year!
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Old 06-14-2012, 07:10 PM   #8
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You may have stopped the poolish plan for now, but, like Dr. Evil, it will return. It's sitting there in the refrigerator, ignoring the snide comments of the camembert (as if it has room to talk) and suffering the insufferable chutney, working out where it went wrong. And it has concluded that its most telling error was to move to quickly, leaving the staging area on the table before it had grown sufficiently large to achieve full movement under its own power. And, when the light goes out, as legend says it always does when the door closes, it sits there in the dark, consumed by dark thoughts, and muttering, "Next time. Next time."

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Old 06-14-2012, 07:22 PM   #9
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That is just TOOOO funny!!!!!

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Originally Posted by GLC View Post
You may have stopped the poolish plan for now, but, like Dr. Evil, it will return. It's sitting there in the refrigerator, ignoring the snide comments of the camembert (as if it has room to talk) and suffering the insufferable chutney, working out where it went wrong. And it has concluded that its most telling error was to move to quickly, leaving the staging area on the table before it had grown sufficiently large to achieve full movement under its own power. And, when the light goes out, as legend says it always does when the door closes, it sits there in the dark, consumed by dark thoughts, and muttering, "Next time. Next time."

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Old 06-14-2012, 07:25 PM   #10
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Examples of both species of Gems.

Antonella, female C. Batesii



Rica, female C. Caninus

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