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Old 06-21-2013, 05:50 PM   #51
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Glad things are getting settled.
Thanks PF. I still want to drive her convertible in the parade in our little town and fling handfuls of Mom at the crowd.

Bad idea of course. And if you dump some cremains at a gravesite in Canada, it's considered littering.
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Old 06-22-2013, 12:44 PM   #52
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Thanks PF. I still want to drive her convertible in the parade in our little town and fling handfuls of Mom at the crowd.

Bad idea of course. And if you dump some cremains at a gravesite in Canada, it's considered littering.
Then it sounds like you shouldn't dump cremains in Canada graveyards...Dad once told me he wanted to be put bit by bit into public ashtrays, he has since changed his mind.
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Old 06-23-2013, 12:36 AM   #53
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Hi; I'm sorry for your loss, as I have experienced that same loss with my own mother, father, and stepfather. I know how hard it is, even with strong faith. I watched each of them pass, and it was painful. But something that struck me, that didn't seem to be experienced by anyone else, that at the instant they passed from this life, the body, at least to me, became litteraly, an empty vessel. I knew that they were no longer inhabiting the physical body, but rather, left for another place, a place that I can't yet go to. And I also knew that I would be able to go there, and see them again, one day in the future. It wasn't a belief for me, but an observation about what happened at that direct instant.

My Dad wanted his ashes sprinkled into one of his favorite fishing streams, out in the middle of nowhere, and we did that. For my sister's sake, some were placed in an urn and into a cemetery, but only for her sake. The body, or what happened to it was unimportant to me, except to honor my Dad's wishes, because, he will get a new one.

I know I'm spouting beliefs that many don't adhere to. But for me, this makes life and death make so much more sense, and easier to understand and live with.

I truly hope that you have something too, that makes it all make sense and worthwhile to you.

We may not live next to each other, but here on DC, we are a real community, almost a family. And I care about you. my prayers are with you.

Seeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North
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Old 06-23-2013, 01:01 AM   #54
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Chief, thank you so much for your beautiful words. Mom has been reduced to a portable box of ashes, and those will be deposited in the place she loved so much. I'm a bit of a class clown/joker as a few of us are here, and sometimes that's how we cope. It is, and has been a very tough time. I so appreciate your wisdom.
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Old 06-23-2013, 12:13 PM   #55
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Chief, thank you so much for your beautiful words. Mom has been reduced to a portable box of ashes, and those will be deposited in the place she loved so much. I'm a bit of a class clown/joker as a few of us are here, and sometimes that's how we cope. It is, and has been a very tough time. I so appreciate your wisdom.
Coping is different for all of us, I think we share the same mechanism. Hugs and you know I wish you the best.
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Old 06-23-2013, 12:20 PM   #56
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Coping is different for all of us, I think we share the same mechanism. Hugs and you know I wish you the best.
Thanks so much, PF!
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Old 06-23-2013, 03:36 PM   #57
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Sweetie know how much we all love and care for you. You will be in our hearts and thoughts evermore. Do what's best for YOU never mind what others think. Your mom and family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Take care, know your loved.
ma
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Old 06-23-2013, 03:45 PM   #58
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Sweetie know how much we all love and care for you. You will be in our hearts and thoughts evermore. Do what's best for YOU never mind what others think. Your mom and family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Take care, know your loved.
ma
Thanks Ma! I pulled rank, and now think I've got it covered.

I have new names for the sibs. Don't ask what they are....
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Old 06-25-2013, 08:24 PM   #59
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.....I'm a bit of a class clown/joker as a few of us are here, and sometimes that's how we cope. It is, and has been a very tough time. I so appreciate your wisdom.
((hugs)) Give it time Dawg. Even if it never gets easier for you, you'll adjust to the change. Sometimes approaching grief with humor is best for your heart. My Mom missed my Dad so badly during her 8 years of widowhood. She had medical issues to begin with, but just didn't care after he died. I had my time to say goodbye all those years and spent good times with her. Once she passed on I was happy for her that she was back with Dad where she wanted to be. My Aunt-in-Law just couldn't understand how I could act so lighthearted at my Mom's wake, but it's how I coped too. Don't let others judge you for what works for you.
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Old 06-25-2013, 08:30 PM   #60
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((hugs)) Give it time Dawg. Even if it never gets easier for you, you'll adjust to the change. Sometimes approaching grief with humor is best for your heart. My Mom missed my Dad so badly during her 8 years of widowhood. She had medical issues to begin with, but just didn't care after he died. I had my time to say goodbye all those years and spent good times with her. Once she passed on I was happy for her that she was back with Dad where she wanted to be. My Aunt-in-Law just couldn't understand how I could act so lighthearted at my Mom's wake, but it's how I coped too. Don't let others judge you for what works for you.
Aww, thanks CG! We're closing in on sprinkling time.
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