Mom's gone

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You are all the best! :wub: Thank you all for the kind thoughts and words of wisdom.

CWS, it is so hard to see a strong woman go downhill. Hugs to you.

Am still working on the obit and memorial, along with sorting out several lifetimes of stuff that we brought back. I am so glad we didn't have a service yet, there was a major blizzard on the day my sister wanted it, and it would have been rushed. We will postpone it for a time the other out of town friends and relatives can make it. Mom was cremated, so there is no rush. She'll keep.
When we had my mother's memorial we got a DVD made by the funeral home. We assembled a bunch of pix of my mum, in chronological order, so they told the story of her life. Then we chose some music that she liked (some of it was Danish). They put together a lovely slide show with captions for various "segments"/events. We threw in some place pix that we found on the web: Copenhagen, the Statue of Liberty for the end of their ocean crossing, a photo they had of the L.A. City Hall. I really like that DVD and watch it every now and again. You should think about doing something like that. If you don't make it too long, and included friends and family in the pix, people will probably enjoy watching it at the memorial.
 
When we had my mother's memorial we got a DVD made by the funeral home. We assembled a bunch of pix of my mum, in chronological order, so they told the story of her life. Then we chose some music that she liked (some of it was Danish). They put together a lovely slide show with captions for various "segments"/events. We threw in some place pix that we found on the web: Copenhagen, the Statue of Liberty for the end of their ocean crossing, a photo they had of the L.A. City Hall. I really like that DVD and watch it every now and again. You should think about doing something like that. If you don't make it too long, and included friends and family in the pix, people will probably enjoy watching it at the memorial.

That sounds lovely, Taxy, and a great idea. Mom had everything scripted out, and she wants a bag piper. A live one. They're hard to come by. I had ordered some bag pipe CD's, according to Mom they were not acceptable. :LOL: I have corresponded with a piper, but there would have been no way to get him there in the midst of a blizzard on Saturday.
 
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My mom passed away this afternoon. A friend found her on the floor, called the ambulance, and she died in the hospital.

It hasn't really hit me yet, I'm still in shock. Lots of phone calls, texts, and emails going on...

I miss her.

I just saw this. I too have lost parents, all three of mine. I now what it feels like. But I promise, you will get to see them again. I firmly believe this. A part of them is in you, and so lives on in this world as well. I know you are strong. And I hope the sorrow passes quickly, and is replaced with the joyful knowledge that she is truly in a better place.

Seeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North
 
I just saw this. I too have lost parents, all three of mine. I now what it feels like. But I promise, you will get to see them again. I firmly believe this. A part of them is in you, and so lives on in this world as well. I know you are strong. And I hope the sorrow passes quickly, and is replaced with the joyful knowledge that she is truly in a better place.

Seeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North

Thanks Chief. I know she's in a better place now, no more pain or sickness. I just hope she approves of the piper I hire....
 
I am so sorry for the loss of your mom, may time ease the pain that no words can. JoAnn

Thank you, JoAnn. I really appreciate all the kind thoughts and words of comfort from our wonderful DC family!
 
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An update. We are not planting Mom, she will be sprinkled. Sibs disagreed with the digging up and displacement of Mom's dad in order to place her cremains in with him. And they didn't like the date I chose for the ceremony. So we will all head to the little island where we spent our summers, and Mom will become fish food. Maybe off the end of the dock. Works for me.
 
An update. We are not planting Mom, she will be sprinkled. Sibs disagreed with the digging up and displacement of Mom's dad in order to place her cremains in with him. And they didn't like the date I chose for the ceremony. So we will all head to the little island where we spent our summers, and Mom will become fish food. Maybe off the end of the dock. Works for me.

Glad things are getting settled.
 
Glad things are getting settled.

Thanks PF. I still want to drive her convertible in the parade in our little town and fling handfuls of Mom at the crowd.

Bad idea of course. And if you dump some cremains at a gravesite in Canada, it's considered littering. :huh:
 
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Thanks PF. I still want to drive her convertible in the parade in our little town and fling handfuls of Mom at the crowd.

Bad idea of course. And if you dump some cremains at a gravesite in Canada, it's considered littering. :huh:

Then it sounds like you shouldn't dump cremains in Canada graveyards...Dad once told me he wanted to be put bit by bit into public ashtrays, he has since changed his mind.:rolleyes:
 
Hi; I'm sorry for your loss, as I have experienced that same loss with my own mother, father, and stepfather. I know how hard it is, even with strong faith. I watched each of them pass, and it was painful. But something that struck me, that didn't seem to be experienced by anyone else, that at the instant they passed from this life, the body, at least to me, became litteraly, an empty vessel. I knew that they were no longer inhabiting the physical body, but rather, left for another place, a place that I can't yet go to. And I also knew that I would be able to go there, and see them again, one day in the future. It wasn't a belief for me, but an observation about what happened at that direct instant.

My Dad wanted his ashes sprinkled into one of his favorite fishing streams, out in the middle of nowhere, and we did that. For my sister's sake, some were placed in an urn and into a cemetery, but only for her sake. The body, or what happened to it was unimportant to me, except to honor my Dad's wishes, because, he will get a new one.

I know I'm spouting beliefs that many don't adhere to. But for me, this makes life and death make so much more sense, and easier to understand and live with.

I truly hope that you have something too, that makes it all make sense and worthwhile to you.

We may not live next to each other, but here on DC, we are a real community, almost a family. And I care about you. my prayers are with you.

Seeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North
 
Chief, thank you so much for your beautiful words. Mom has been reduced to a portable box of ashes, and those will be deposited in the place she loved so much. I'm a bit of a class clown/joker as a few of us are here, and sometimes that's how we cope. It is, and has been a very tough time. I so appreciate your wisdom.
 
Chief, thank you so much for your beautiful words. Mom has been reduced to a portable box of ashes, and those will be deposited in the place she loved so much. I'm a bit of a class clown/joker as a few of us are here, and sometimes that's how we cope. It is, and has been a very tough time. I so appreciate your wisdom.

Coping is different for all of us, I think we share the same mechanism. Hugs and you know I wish you the best.:heart:
 
Sweetie know how much we all love and care for you. You will be in our hearts and thoughts evermore. Do what's best for YOU never mind what others think. Your mom and family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Take care, know your loved.
ma
 
Sweetie know how much we all love and care for you. You will be in our hearts and thoughts evermore. Do what's best for YOU never mind what others think. Your mom and family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Take care, know your loved.
ma

Thanks Ma! I pulled rank, and now think I've got it covered.

I have new names for the sibs. Don't ask what they are....
 
.....I'm a bit of a class clown/joker as a few of us are here, and sometimes that's how we cope. It is, and has been a very tough time. I so appreciate your wisdom.

((hugs)) Give it time Dawg. Even if it never gets easier for you, you'll adjust to the change. Sometimes approaching grief with humor is best for your heart. My Mom missed my Dad so badly during her 8 years of widowhood. She had medical issues to begin with, but just didn't care after he died. I had my time to say goodbye all those years and spent good times with her. Once she passed on I was happy for her that she was back with Dad where she wanted to be. My Aunt-in-Law just couldn't understand how I could act so lighthearted at my Mom's wake, but it's how I coped too. Don't let others judge you for what works for you.
 
((hugs)) Give it time Dawg. Even if it never gets easier for you, you'll adjust to the change. Sometimes approaching grief with humor is best for your heart. My Mom missed my Dad so badly during her 8 years of widowhood. She had medical issues to begin with, but just didn't care after he died. I had my time to say goodbye all those years and spent good times with her. Once she passed on I was happy for her that she was back with Dad where she wanted to be. My Aunt-in-Law just couldn't understand how I could act so lighthearted at my Mom's wake, but it's how I coped too. Don't let others judge you for what works for you.

Aww, thanks CG! We're closing in on sprinkling time.
 
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