As I said before, I cook for me. Shrek is the one with Diabetes. It took me a while to realize that it is HIS responsibility to eat correctly for his health, not mine. He attended all the nutrition classes, he understands and he chooses to ignore it...that's his right.
My problem was, I was looking at it as a failure on my part as a wife and a nurse. It took discussion with a therapist to find out it wasn't my problem. It hasn't stopped me caring, but it has stopped the conflict and my feelings of anger and despair.
Now you've got it! I think some of the wives/cooks in the family view themselves as failures because of their inability to satisfy everyone. Well, guess what, that's not your job. Someone told me a saying a long time ago that makes worlds of sense, in many areas of life, and that is:
"If you try to please everyone, you wind up pleasing no one."