First: This question is too deep for me and I would not respond were it not that you say you asked a year ago, presumably unsuccessfully, and this current question is a couple days old. I have a hunch that the solution will involve;
1. Pork fat (smoked would be nice, but not essential)
2. Cumin
3. Onion
4. Garlic
5. Peppers and chilies
6. Tomatoes
You said: I am looking for a baked beans recipe (possibly BBQ???) that is not very sweet.
...
Thanks Robo... this combination of ingredients you listed... are the beans still not sweet like the usual baked beans?
I'm going to guess you mean not as sweet as, for instance, Van de Kamps canned "baked beans". Not picking on any brand just trying to set a benchmark. If you tell us what you don't want we'll better be able to suggest a direction. Please advise something that, in Memphis Tennessee, I might recognize, that you don't want it as sweet as.
I love beans and make them from scratch often but I have no idea what "usual baked beans" are. Northern Boston baked beans I've tasted bear little resemblance to beans you would get with good southern barbecue, and I won't even get started on Texican beans.
I think all "baked beans" are sweetened with molasses or brown sugar or both. In the south the sweetness is often offset with vinegar, peppers (chilies) and maybe Kentucky bourbon or Tennessee whiskey.
I sympathise with trying to make something without ingredients some say are essential, but beans aren't tall hat, french chef rocket science. Everything needed is available virtually everywhere. Out of curiosity, what part of our country and, more important, what kind of environment, did your husband have the beans he liked so well?
Since virtually everone in America has a mother or aunt who made the best baked beans ever, this post should have angered enough of them that if you post a little more guidance on what you're looking for, there will be plenty of responses, if only to tell me how wrong I am.