Haha, I fogot that cilantro is also something I would add to my Thai curries. I'd chop it and sprinkle on top immediately before serving. I would NEVER put cilantro in the dish at any stage of cooking before serving.
Another criticism of Asian fast food: Almost all of any Asian food I ever ate was freshly cooked and served immediately. How long does it take for cilantro to go bad and get all yucky under the heat lamps? Or on a steam table?
Sprinkling with cilantro is something you might do just like French chefs sometimes sprinkle parsley on the dish before serving, as kind of like a garnish.
I think there may be a genetic difference in taste receptors that causes some people to not like cilantro. I have never tasted the "soapy" thing, although I've seen it mentioned and discussed far too often to discount it. Obviously some people taste cilantro differently, taste it as soapy, and I'm glad I'm not one of them.