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Old 05-25-2006, 09:31 AM   #61
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Beth, I'm sorry you felt this way about your post; being a member of several forums, and a past member of the infamous FoodTV forums, I think the way the topic was handled was totally appropriate. You have a belief; others may have different beliefs, and they responded in an intelligent, lively manner. Your sensitivity to responses made was equal to the reaction you got from others re your original post being condescending.

Bottom line about this forum is this; this group of global foodies is SO diverse, in cultures, eating habits, economic status, cooking/kitchen knowledge, and religious beliefs. The thing that brings us together IS the lively discussion, and the fact that no one tries to force their own beliefs on anyone else. I happen to eat meat; my hubbie doesn't, but he eats fish; my son doesn't eat meat or fish. I don't try to force burgers and roast chicken on them, and they don't make me eat tofu if I don't want to.

The fact that we can all come here, and take whatever we want to from the forums is the beauty here. If you feel you were being slammed and criticized, then you mistook the posts of others - just as they may have mistaken yours.

Bottom line - you have your opinion, others have theirs.

Hope you stay with us!

PS - There's no need to shout here - internet etiquette perceives posts in all caps to be shouting.

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Old 05-25-2006, 10:26 AM   #62
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Originally Posted by marmalady

PS - There's no need to shout here - internet etiquette perceives posts in all caps to be shouting.
Marmalady has pointed something out here that I believe you may have overlooked beth. The printed word is a difficult medium. As communicators, we rely heavily on the intonation and facial expression of the people we are communicating with. Therefore, when one is only able to glean meaning from the printed word misunderstandings can happen. For example, Marmalady points out that your last post seems to indicate you are "yelling" at all of us on the thread. We realize that is not your intent of course, but that is one possible perception.

It has been my experience in life, and as a moderator on this board, that when someone lets you know that you have possibly upset them you should apologize and attempt to make your meaning clearer. And if you are upset or offended by something, you should let the "offender" know that you are requesting clarification of a point as you don't wish to become offended unnecessarily. Now, this paragraph was not directed at any particular person or persons, it is merely information I thought I would share so that future hiccups might be more easily resolved.

Beth, it would be a shame to lose you as a poster, you have much to offer. You must be comfortable though, we understand that.

Marmalady, beautifully written. Thank you for the clarity of your post.

To everyone, I had considered locking this thread, but I am so impressed with the way everyone is expressing themselves, I am leaving it open. Thanks to all of you.

Resume debate about Velveeta and Spam please. Sorry to hijack!

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Old 05-25-2006, 10:39 AM   #63
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Originally Posted by bethzaring
Well folks, lets just duke it out right now

I chuckled when mylegsbig recently said he wanted to use the best ingredients in a home made version of hamburger helper and was intending to use Velvetta, I was thinking, I don't think so. ...Velvetta does not make the cut...And I now realize it is not even refrigerated in the grocery stores... But by the amount of dry shelf space that was devoted to velvetta, that ain't gonna happen soon.
It is not okay to mock/scoff anyone. You started this post with two banging over the head icons looking for a debate. Mission accomplished. Suggestion - you could have started a poll, but whatever try not to offend people with your opinion... this is not a classsroom where we must be taught a lesson.
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Old 05-25-2006, 10:57 AM   #64
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I have to definitely agree with Mish here. Whether you meant it or not, your original post DID come across as extremely condescending & mocking - like you felt you had to "teach" the rest of us something, & that your views & eating habits were ultimately superior (the "competence level" remark was the clincher for me). Again - this may not be what you meant, but it is the way you came across.

Yup - I buy Velveeta & Spam upon occasion, & I'm also guilty of enjoying a fast-food meal once in awhile. At the same time, I'm also very much aware of good nutrition & at my age definitely do not need someone - teacher/nutritionist/or otherwise - feeling the need to bonk me over the head with the drawbacks of processed food. And I think everyone else here who occasionally "succumbs" to purchasing a processed food product knows this as well.

We're all adults here, & I'd be really really surprised if anyone here, due to your advice, jumped up & said "gee, I didn't know Velveeta was a processed food & processed food isn't a great idea on a regular basis".
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Old 05-25-2006, 11:27 AM   #65
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Ain't nuthin in the werld wrong with a toasted velveeter sammich with nice ripe maters! :)
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Old 05-25-2006, 11:46 AM   #66
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Thank you marmalady, alix, Mish and Breezycooking for your excellent comments, I truely appreciate them and have taken them to heart. I am humbly sorry for offending anyone. I may not be starting any more posts, but I do enjoy answering questions when I can.

I have not participated in a forum before. What happens when a thread is locked, does it disappear?

Thanks again, Beth
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margaret Mead
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Old 05-25-2006, 11:57 AM   #67
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When a thread it locked it remains visible, but no one is able to add any more posts or edit anything.

Thank you everyone for keeping this thread civil and for seeing both sides of the coin and most of all from learning from this thread. On any other board this type of thread could have easily turned very ugly, but at DC were are all better than that as is shown by this thread so thank you all!
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Old 05-25-2006, 12:39 PM   #68
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Have to agree with Mish. When I read that first part, it seemed to me that you wanted us all to agree that Velveeta is awful.
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Old 05-25-2006, 01:36 PM   #69
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Beth, I truly hope you continue to post; these forums are all about sharing, and your philosophy about food is just as valuable as anyone else's. We all make choices in how we live, what we eat, where we live and how we dress. It's the beauty of America, that we can make those choices. Perhaps, with your post, you truly educated someone on the 'dangers' of Velveeta. Maybe some person will make a decision based on your thoughts. I truly think the thing most folks objected to was the sort of being dictated to. If, as you said, the folks are are pretty much educated about food matters, then the assumption has to be that most folks wouldn't want to live on a steady diet of Velveeta. But - the motto, 'All things in moderation' truly applies here.

Enough - I'm off my soapbox. As I said above, I think I echo the thoughts of others when I say we'd be sad to not hear from you anymore!
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Old 05-25-2006, 05:50 PM   #70
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Originally Posted by mish
this is not a classsroom where we must be taught a lesson.
I beg to differ... if we are not learning something here and it is not a classroom, then what is the purpose of this forum? I always have looked at this forum as a classroom. In fact, the very existence of this forum is evident that it is a learning tool. If it weren't, nobody would try to exchange ideas and teach each other about our personal experiences with food.

In this age of childhood obesity, Type II diabetes, rampant heart disease, etc... I am GLAD to have a nutitionist here. Beth, teach me all you can!

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