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Old 03-20-2013, 12:20 AM   #21
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Well, went to talk the teacher and principal. Of course they tried to blame my daughter. I tried to be polite which really was not easy seeing the stubbornness of them both. I have suggested an alternative policy, will see what happens. In all honesty I doubt it will help. Talked toy daughter told her to try to avoid the bathroom issue as much as she can.
What are they blaming her for? Are they claiming that she isn't really going to the washroom? Are they saying she needs to learn to hold it in? Because if that's what they are saying, that's just wrong. As my Scottish ex would have said, "It's not on!"
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Old 03-20-2013, 09:17 AM   #22
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Mostly, that she wants to go right away when the class starts. Problem is they have no break before this class. I am sure she is using this as an excuse to get away, she thinks this teacher hates her and is afraid to go to class.
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Old 03-20-2013, 11:35 AM   #23
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Well, went to talk the teacher and principal. Of course they tried to blame my daughter. I tried to be polite which really was not easy seeing the stubbornness of them both. I have suggested an alternative policy, will see what happens. In all honesty I doubt it will help. Talked toy daughter told her to try to avoid the bathroom issue as much as she can.
I'm sorry to hear that, CharlieD. I know you were most likely polite. Can you get your family doctor to write a letter that states your daughter needs to have access to the washroom (it doesn't matter that she doesn't have a medical condition, she is at that age where things happen unexpectedly and can be very embarrassing)?

Your daughter is not to blame. This is a really difficult time for girls that age for lots of reasons. The school officials should understand and accommodate that. And, you are a really good Dad for standing up for her--kudos to you. Twenty years from now, she will remember how her Dad went to the school and fought for her--and know you loved her best.
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Old 03-20-2013, 11:47 AM   #24
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Mostly, that she wants to go right away when the class starts. Problem is they have no break before this class. I am sure she is using this as an excuse to get away, she thinks this teacher hates her and is afraid to go to class.
Well, that is another issue. I took German, Spanish, Latin, Ojibway, Norwegian, and French when I was in grade 10. Several of those classes were at the local college. My high school Spanish teacher ridiculed me in class for 20 minutes one day because "only one in a million people could study or speak more than one language and I wasn't one of those." (He was wrong--but I only learned that later). It was horrible. I ran out of the class and hid in ... the washroom. Three of my classmates came with me. He said that I could not handle learning all those languages at one time. I studied 12 languages and dedicated my M.A. thesis to him. But I was so hurt and humiliated.

I was so proud of my Dad for storming into the high school and demanding that teacher be reprimanded (maybe my Dad could have been a little more diplomatic). I knew then that my Dad loved me more than life itself, and I know you love your daughter more than life itself. Regardless of how stupid the policy may be, I applaud you for standing by your daughter.It may not make any difference re: the policy. but she will remember that. And, btw, I got an A in Spanish (whether I deserved it or not).
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Old 03-20-2013, 12:47 PM   #25
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CW that is for sure a heart warming story. Though i have to agree with your teacher, as far as number of the languages you took at the same time ;) no offense please, but his approach suck, just like the stupid bathroom policy. And e special thank you for the kind words. BTW, I did yelled at the teacher last week publicly, when she went on the walk with girls but then left them alone in the middle of the street and went back by herself. I happened to be at school when girls came back and call her on that, she just laughed at them. That made me so mad, I screamed at her in front of everybody.
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Old 03-20-2013, 01:08 PM   #26
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CW that is for sure a heart warming story. Though i have to agree with your teacher, as far as number of the languages you took at the same time ;) no offense please, but his approach suck, just like the stupid bathroom policy. And e special thank you for the kind words. BTW, I did yelled at the teacher last week publicly, when she went on the walk with girls but then left them alone in the middle of the street and went back by herself. I happened to be at school when girls came back and call her on that, she just laughed at them. That made me so mad, I screamed at her in front of everybody.
Wrong, CharlieD, the brain can handle learning a number of languages (and other things). We only use 10% of our brain. I studied second-language acquisition in college. He was wrong. I won't bore you with how the brain acquires language skills and how we are able to put each language in a "black box."

Can you enroll your daughter in another school (is that an option)? If you can, then telling her current school she is leaving translates to "we're losing money." Are there trustees for the school? Can you talk with them? It all just seems very WRONG.
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Old 03-20-2013, 03:12 PM   #27
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Mostly, that she wants to go right away when the class starts. Problem is they have no break before this class. I am sure she is using this as an excuse to get away, she thinks this teacher hates her and is afraid to go to class.
I think you may have gotten to the cause of the problem - the teacher. I would not have been pleased with her sarcastic remark to your daughter about her dramatics/theatrics. In my day, I recall children getting hit on the hands with a ruler, or told to stand in a closet. One teacher threw chalk at a student for talking during class. I don't have any answers. I'm sorry that you & your daughter have to be subjected to a teacher that makes such a fuss about a student asking to go to the restroom.
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Old 03-20-2013, 03:25 PM   #28
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I used to tell my kids, "Don't come home and tell me the teacher did something mean to you." As far as I was concerned, she had 25 or more students in a class. Then one day her fourth grade teacher who had a bad habit of throwing things at the kids to get their attention, threw a ball. It missed the intedned victim and hit my daughter straight in her eye. She ran outof school straigth home. I was a raving maniac when I went up to the school. He got fired and was brought up on charges by the School Committee. He lost his license to teach. The teacher is not always right.

CWS, it is a known fact that young folks have the ability to learn languages much easier than adults. My grandson is three y.o. He speaks English to my son, Italian to his mother and Albanian to his maternal grandparents. And he goes from one language to another all in the same conversation. He has been doing this ever since he started to form words. I wish you could see him sitting around the holiday table with three languages being spoken to him all at once. My DIL speaks five languages and is the reason she is in International Banking. Her mother speaks seven. Her father speaks two.
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Old 03-20-2013, 04:56 PM   #29
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Tell your daughter to take her own break "before class starts" so what if she's 30 seconds late for class. Most teachers take 15-20 minutes just to get their acts together, then maybe teach something. Most classes when I was in school had a 5 min grace period before the tardy slips were diligently handed out.

I frankly would have told the principal and teacher " Let her go when she needs to without a hassle. Or I'll be taking all of my kids out of your lacking uneducated, self supporting, over payed teachers hands. My wife and I will be home schooling our kids." No matter what they say or tell you that you can't or it's illegal. It's not. Yes you can.

That will substantially decrease your daughters anxiety. She won't need to do the eye roll. That is incredibly rude for anyone to do at any age.
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Old 03-21-2013, 12:08 AM   #30
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You didn't spend all that time potty training her to allow some other person make her wet herself...
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