Bold New Stock Terms ????????

[Maidrite]

STOCK MARKET TERMS for 2008 and beyond.

CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET -- A short-term random market movement causing an investor
to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance,
the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband isn't happy.

VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors GOING TO A CUBS GAME as the
market keeps crashing.

BROKER -- What my stock adviser has made me.

STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets
equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the
toilet.

YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per
share.

WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo
@ $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a
nuthouse.

**PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use!!!

YIKES !!!!!!

 

[attie]

That's about it Maidrite, there's a lot of angry people around the world, and rightly so

 

[simplicity]

That's funny. Thanks Maidrite!