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Old 02-28-2006, 07:31 AM   #1
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Talking Classified funny

Classified Ads


The Following Were Actually Taken From Classified Ads In Newspapers:
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL LITTLE DOG.

FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 COCKER SPANIEL
1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG

FREE PUPPIES... PART GERMAN SHEPHERD PART STUPID DOG

FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG.
LOOKS LIKE A RAT...
BEEN OUT AWHILE..
BETTER BE REWARD.

1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer

SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...
ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.

2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES:
1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15

TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS OWN 1988 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800

COWS FOR SALE. NEVER BRED CALVES.

ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.

FULL SIZED MATTRESS.
20 YR. WARRANTY
LIKE NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL.

NORDIC TRACK $300
HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBY

BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING
"WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"

HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER
"IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"

HARRISBURG POSTAL EMPLOYEES GUN CLUB

GEORGIA PEACHES
CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.

NICE PARACHUTE:
NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE

TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.

EXERCISE EQUIPMENT:
QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS - $175.

OUR SOFA WILL SEAT THE WHOLE MOB.
100% ITALIAN LEATHER.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
SELLING WASHER & DRYER $300.

ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES
FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER

OPEN HOUSE
BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON
FREE COFFEE & DONUTS AND NOW FOR THE BEST OF THE LOT:

FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 negotiable. No longer needed. Recently
married; wife knows everything.

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Old 02-28-2006, 07:39 AM   #2
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This was also among one of the classified adverts in rome...

Free to good home

Friendly Rottweiler.
Eats everything.
Especially loves children.
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Old 02-28-2006, 08:34 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by urmaniac13
This was also among one of the classified adverts in rome...

Free to good home

Friendly Rottweiler.
Eats everything.
Especially loves children.
Hmmmmmmmmm . . . . . . amazing how a slip of the tongue, or in this case pen/computer, can make what you wanted to say completely different!
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Old 02-28-2006, 08:59 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by urmaniac13
This was also among one of the classified adverts in rome...

Free to good home

Friendly Rottweiler.
Eats everything.
Especially loves children.
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LEO'S WEBSITE:
http://www.leomw.zoomshare.com/
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Old 02-28-2006, 09:58 AM   #5
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SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...
ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS


NORDIC TRACK $300
HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBY


Too funny
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