I'm such a lousy cook my cat only has three lives left.
When we go on a picnic, the ants bring Rolaids.
I don't throw anything out. Last year the Health Department condemned my refrigerator.
My husband does a lot of the cooking around our house. At least, I think he does. I eat out myself.
They say the great chefs put a lot of feeling into their cooking. I put a lot of tobasco in mine--you can feel that for days!
I really hate to cook. For breakfast I had a tub of Cool Whip.
My idea of a "Happy Meal" is any meal I don't have to cook.