vitauta
Executive Chef
i'll have what she's having....
DC's own coffee klatch
- Thread starter vitauta
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I just need to sit and relax a bit before starting my to-do list for today. My Mom has been gone for 2 1/2 years now, and I still have days like today where I miss her so much that I spend the morning crying. It's nothing in particular that sets it off, but just an empty feeling in my whole body. Hubby is truly my best friend that I have ever had, but my Mom was my favorite woman ever. She taught me so many things like how to cook and bake, but she taught me so much more like how to be patient, how to love others, how to be the rock for the family, how to be the best Mom, Grandma, and Great Grandma the world has ever seen!
As some of you remember (since I have told the story before), Mom and I used to have a tea party across the miles-her in Michigan, and I in Colorado. One of us would call the other, and we would chat while drinking tea out of our matching china cups. We would chat about anything and everything, and when we were finished we put the tea cups away for next time. Well, I decided this morning that I wanted to have tea with Mom, so I got the dusty old tea cup out of the hutch (next to her picture) and washed it and I am going to have a cup of tea with Mom now. Don't mind me if I cry. Guess I just need to get it out of my system for a bit.........
As some of you remember (since I have told the story before), Mom and I used to have a tea party across the miles-her in Michigan, and I in Colorado. One of us would call the other, and we would chat while drinking tea out of our matching china cups. We would chat about anything and everything, and when we were finished we put the tea cups away for next time. Well, I decided this morning that I wanted to have tea with Mom, so I got the dusty old tea cup out of the hutch (next to her picture) and washed it and I am going to have a cup of tea with Mom now. Don't mind me if I cry. Guess I just need to get it out of my system for a bit.........
ahoymatey2013
Senior Cook
Oh the joys of having 3 DVRs in my home! While I like to cook my hubby's thing is the tv and recording movies so I don't ever miss a show because I can record up to 6 things at one time. He even put in a DVRs up at the camper so even up there he can record stuff. That's just not my thing but the tv keeps him from going out so I can deal with it but he wants me to watch stuff and I just don't like today's movies so I sit down and fall asleep every time
I just got up after 2 hours of sleep and I am waking up so I can clean up and go shopping forums picnic on Saturday.
ahoymatey2013
Senior Cook
I'm sorry that you are hurting today Chopper.
Chopper, I think having a cup of tea with your mum is a wonderful idea. (((Hugs)))
Thanks. I choose a pomegranate raspberry tea to start off this morning. It was really good, and I think Mom would have liked it too. After two cups I took a walk with the dogs. They were having so much fun running around and sniffing that I couldn't help but cheer up. I had a friend tell me the other day that I just needed to stop letting myself feel sad about not having Mom around. That is easier said than done, and probably not really necessary. Just so you know, i am not sad all of the time, but once in a while it gets the best of me. i will stop sharing those feelings with that friend. I have great memories, but I will always be sad that I don't have her to share things with any more. I think I will have a little more tea out on the deck and then wash up my special cup and put it away again for a while. I won't let it get quite so dusty this time and will use it again soon. The hugs were wonderful. Thanks again.
Cooking Goddess
Chef Extraordinaire
Oh chops, I know just how you feel.
I'm going to guess that your friend either still has her Mom/parents in her life or else she didn't have the same special relationship with her mom like you had with yours. Her loss. You hold tight to those memories. They're certainly something special.
ahoymatey2013
Senior Cook
I don't think a person can truly get over a parent's loss, no matter what their relationship was like.
One thing a friend is for, is to lean on when it's needed. I'm a cold hearted person but when my bestie needs me I am there for her as long as I don't have to hug her but if she really needed a hug she knows I would give her one.
My friend was brought up in foster care & she had it rough. She has so many brothers & sisters that she doesn't know & she just lost one of her unknown sisters in a car accident the other week. Now, you have to remember that she knows how I am & I know how she values her family so when we were shopping at Dollar General I snuck off to the cards & handed it to her in the store to read so I could put it back. I got a good hearted giggle from her & then a thank you for being me & being there for her. Her bday is coming up, I think we'll have to go back down to the store so I can give her a card.
One thing a friend is for, is to lean on when it's needed. I'm a cold hearted person but when my bestie needs me I am there for her as long as I don't have to hug her but if she really needed a hug she knows I would give her one.
My friend was brought up in foster care & she had it rough. She has so many brothers & sisters that she doesn't know & she just lost one of her unknown sisters in a car accident the other week. Now, you have to remember that she knows how I am & I know how she values her family so when we were shopping at Dollar General I snuck off to the cards & handed it to her in the store to read so I could put it back. I got a good hearted giggle from her & then a thank you for being me & being there for her. Her bday is coming up, I think we'll have to go back down to the store so I can give her a card.
Cooking Goddess
Chef Extraordinaire
That is exactly what my uncle used to do to my aunt! B-day, Mother's Day, he covered them all. 
Lots more hugs, Chopper. I would like to read some stories about your Mom and you.
I know when my Mom (and Dad) go I will have a horrible time of it and I hope I have loving friends around me to help with the burden.
Story about my Mom:
Mom grew up rather privileged...kinda like the debutante who married the farm boy. So there were lots of things she had just never encountered, reptiles and amphibians being some of those things. Daddy got sent to Guam and he was allowed to bring the family. It was an adventure for we three girls, torture for Mom, the heat, humidity and the wildlife. Wild pigs that would run out of the jungle, geckos and shrews in the house. She was a wreck.
One morning she opened the kitchen door and a 5 pound frog hopped in...they say you could hear her screams in Hawaii.
Cherish the stories, even if they would make her blush. Happy and funny memories are the best things to write when you are feeling down and every memory keeps your Mom permanently placed in your heart.
Thinking of you Chops (big hug)
That is a lovely story with the tea cups
I am very close with my mum and I know I would be like you and miss her so much if she wasnt with me anymore, it would be extremely hard
That is a lovely story with the tea cups
I am very close with my mum and I know I would be like you and miss her so much if she wasnt with me anymore, it would be extremely hard
Addie
Chef Extraordinaire
As soon as I finish the ironing for Kylie I will be right over. So sit there and just enjoy those scones.
Addie
Chef Extraordinaire
I know it is too late for a lot of us, but you should try to record the stories your parents have to tell. You not only have the sound of their voice, but a family history. And if they are reluctant to talk, tell them it is for the grandchildren. You want them to remember their grandparents. And by the way, you should start recording some of your stories also. Record stories not only of your parents childhood, but the years you were growing up. Have them tell what new inventions came their way to make life easier. News events that impacted their life, etc. You get the idea.
vitauta
Executive Chef
good morning, all! i have brought in a box of donuts to go with our morning coffee (okay, or tea) to start up our own celebration of National Donut Day!!
dig in folks, i'm leaving this box of assorted donuts on the counter...you may notice one of the jelly donuts is missing....
dig in folks, i'm leaving this box of assorted donuts on the counter...you may notice one of the jelly donuts is missing....
Addie
Chef Extraordinaire
good morning, all! i have brought in a box of donuts to go with our morning coffee (okay, or tea) to start up our own celebration of National Donut Day!!
dig in folks, i'm leaving this box of assorted donuts on the counter...you may notice one of the jelly donuts is missing....
I am going to take the plain cake one. Less sugar and I just happen to like them. They are great when you warm them and put butter on them. Thanks.
Thanks everyone for the support.
I can't remember the last time I had a donut! I'm glad you brought some cream filled. So often those are overlooked when people buy donuts, and I do love them!
I'm having some English breakfast tea this morning. It is a beautiful morning and the birds are singing. Every so often the peacock across the street will start talking and the other birds stop for a bit, and then he stops and they all start singing again. I am not sure what that is. 
I was the youngest of four children born within four and a half years. My Mom was a busy woman having three in diapers at once. I bet she didn't complain much though because she just got things done and loved being a mother. When I look back at pictures now, there are aren't as many pictures of me, and I am guessing that by the time I was born there just wasn't as much time to take pictures. It didn't mean that I was loved less! Mom had the great ability to make each child think that they were her favorite, and I have no doubt that at any given moment each one was her favorite. He is a story of when I was her favorite.
I was in kindergarten, which meant that I went to school just in the morning, and my siblings went to school all day. This was the last year that Mom was a stay at home mom, so in the afternoon, she was all mine! When the bus dropped her baby off from school Mom was always waiting outside to greet me! I felt like an only child for the first time in my life, and I loved it! She would take me places that only she and I would go, like the dime store for lunch. We didn't have a lot of money, so I am not sure how she pulled that off, but she did (at least once, because I remember it well). We sat in a booth and I got to order all by myself! I had chili, and so did Mom. I thought I was going to fall off of my chair when she offered a milk shake instead of a glass of milk. We shared the shake, and it may have been the best one I ever had! That day Mom said that her and I had something special. I have never forgotten that day.
Now a big leap to last summer when my Dad came to visit on what may have been his last trip to Colorado. One of my sisters came along with him, so one night we were all talking and laughing about Mom. It was nice to laugh about fun times! Anyway, after talking about Mom and I going off for lunch the last time I was visiting her before she passed away, my Dad said, "You and your Mom really did have something special!" I didn't know anyone had noticed.
I can't remember the last time I had a donut! I'm glad you brought some cream filled. So often those are overlooked when people buy donuts, and I do love them!
I'm having some English breakfast tea this morning. It is a beautiful morning and the birds are singing. Every so often the peacock across the street will start talking and the other birds stop for a bit, and then he stops and they all start singing again. I am not sure what that is. I was the youngest of four children born within four and a half years. My Mom was a busy woman having three in diapers at once. I bet she didn't complain much though because she just got things done and loved being a mother. When I look back at pictures now, there are aren't as many pictures of me, and I am guessing that by the time I was born there just wasn't as much time to take pictures. It didn't mean that I was loved less! Mom had the great ability to make each child think that they were her favorite, and I have no doubt that at any given moment each one was her favorite. He is a story of when I was her favorite.
I was in kindergarten, which meant that I went to school just in the morning, and my siblings went to school all day. This was the last year that Mom was a stay at home mom, so in the afternoon, she was all mine! When the bus dropped her baby off from school Mom was always waiting outside to greet me! I felt like an only child for the first time in my life, and I loved it! She would take me places that only she and I would go, like the dime store for lunch. We didn't have a lot of money, so I am not sure how she pulled that off, but she did (at least once, because I remember it well). We sat in a booth and I got to order all by myself! I had chili, and so did Mom. I thought I was going to fall off of my chair when she offered a milk shake instead of a glass of milk. We shared the shake, and it may have been the best one I ever had! That day Mom said that her and I had something special. I have never forgotten that day.
Now a big leap to last summer when my Dad came to visit on what may have been his last trip to Colorado. One of my sisters came along with him, so one night we were all talking and laughing about Mom. It was nice to laugh about fun times! Anyway, after talking about Mom and I going off for lunch the last time I was visiting her before she passed away, my Dad said, "You and your Mom really did have something special!" I didn't know anyone had noticed.
GREAT story chopper.
Thanks for the donuts vituata! Any lemon filled ones? Mmmmmm! TWO! Woot! You know what I like best about these donuts? The filled donuts just have regular sugar on them rather than icing sugar. Delicious!
Thanks for the donuts vituata! Any lemon filled ones? Mmmmmm! TWO! Woot! You know what I like best about these donuts? The filled donuts just have regular sugar on them rather than icing sugar. Delicious!
vitauta
Executive Chef
with sweet loving memories like you and your mom made together, chopper, you cannot help but emerge from your sadness spells lifted by the love and special bond between you that is forever alive....
sorry. this note got posted before i was finished writing.
sorry. this note got posted before i was finished writing.
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Thanks. When I was growing up I always knew that there was one person in this world that would love me no matter what else happened. I still have that with Hubby, but there is something about a mothers love.....
Mom really knew how to live her "dash."
The Dash
by Linda Ellis
I read of a man who stood to speak
at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone,
from the beginning…to the end.
He noted that first came the date of her birth
and spoke of the following date with tears,
but he said what mattered most of all
was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the time
that she spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved her
know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own,
the cars…the house…the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend our dash.
So, think about this long and hard.
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left
that can still be rearranged.
If we could just slow down enough
to consider what’s true and real
and always try to understand
the way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger
and show appreciation more
and love the people in our lives
like we’ve never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect
and more often wear a smile,
remembering that this special dash
might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy is being read,
with your life’s actions to rehash…
would you be proud of the things they say
about how you spent YOUR dash?
