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Old 11-29-2007, 07:13 PM   #31
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Tell them the road goes in both directions!!! Not that our families ever listen to that.
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Old 11-29-2007, 07:17 PM   #32
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Christmas has always been a big fight in our family... as a child of divorced parents... now add Paul's family into the mix and it gets quite stressful. We've always had to drive for hours and then "deal" with my family and drive more hours to have fun with his.... a few years ago we started doing X-mas with his family one year and Thanksgiving with mine switching the next year so that my Mom gets x-mas everyother year ( according to her it only counts if we are there to celebrate on December 25th. One day early or late and it doesn't count. She doesn't get her Christmas! She's quite a pain about it.


This year however
I put my foot down!!! I'm having Christmas at my house. I get to be the mom and plan the menu and do the decorating and be in charge. It's much nicer and so far (even though there have been pleanty of complaints) I'm liking it much better!! : )
I'm so glad you worked this out, pdswife! I found myself feeling pushed and pulled from many different directions to the point that I dreaded this time of year and felt exhausted afterward. Then I realized that it wasn't that I had lost the meaning and joy of Christmas - there just wasn't any time left over for it!!! So 8 years ago, I told everyone how much I loved them and invited them to come and visit the week before or the week after but told them we would be having our Christmas at home so that we could truly focus on what it should be.

Then I told everyone very early the next year that I wanted to stop Christmas gift exchanging from then on. I explained that I have 7 children and it's unfair to expect others to buy for so many and that also, we are fortunate to have all that we need and most of what we want so we'd prefer no one buy gifts for us. Just call or visit or come for coffee or send us great wishes. I told them we would be selecting a needy person or family in our city and we would be providing gifts for them. The card always reads from our family and all our friends and relatives.

There were complaints about our new Christmas arrangements for a couple of years but then, I started to get positive comments from relatives. They said they love me and the children and appreciate that I don't want or expect Christmas gifts or anything else, just their love. My friends have always told me how much they appreciate our low-maintenance friendship. And my children get to have a lovely Christmas at home and the pleasure of playing Santa to someone in need. It's worked out great for all of us!

Oh, and like most of you, I love to give gifts and I do it year round. I just don't feel like I have to do it all on one day of the year anymore!
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Old 11-29-2007, 07:37 PM   #33
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bad experience...too stressful now.
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Old 11-29-2007, 07:51 PM   #34
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Barbara L, I think you and I could be sisters concerning Christmas. I, too, love the church programs and could listen to Christmas music and the story of the birth of the Christ child over and over. I realize it will never be the same as it was years ago when my children were small and at home and also my father was living, but also things have moved on. I have grandchildren that are a joy even if they never remember to send thank yous. They do tell us. Even Charlie, the one just turned 4 is such a big part of our life. I tell him "Charlie, I love you". He says "you sure do" and that is worth everything to know that they realize they are loved. I do find myself remembering Christmas in the past, but I suppose most people relive those times over and over - some sad, some sweet.
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Old 11-29-2007, 08:43 PM   #35
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As a child, I loved that Christmas was coming. We attended church on a VERY regular basis and now, not so much if at all. We can't agree on one. Love the music, love the presentation, love the songs and the singers, the decorations. It was always something so very special.

God is no less in my life, and sorry if that's no okay to say. True though. Just wish it was more about Him than everything else.

I loved reading all these comments as we do all have much in common. Thanks to all of you for dropping notes on the subject.
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Old 11-30-2007, 12:26 AM   #36
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like almost everything else in life, it's what you make of it.

you really can make it a merry christmas (and happy hannukah. i've got a little gb on my shoulder after one of his holiday posts a long time ago ) for someone, if you should so wish it to be.

materialism and selfishness go hand in hand.

umm, here's your soapbox back. i need to go shopping.
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Old 11-30-2007, 12:34 AM   #37
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I dont like it either. Dont need the holiday to be nice and caring for others, should be done year round. All I see it as is a BIG Bday party for the kids. This year we are doing things a little different and buying family type gifts, in the long run it will be enjoyed much more by everyone and be a great bonding time for us all!
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Old 11-30-2007, 01:09 AM   #38
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Do you 'really' enjoy this time of year?
In a half a nutshell no for various reasons. But in the other half of the nutshell I love it - so I'm just a mixed nut this time of year!
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Old 11-30-2007, 08:53 AM   #39
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umm, here's your soapbox back. i need to go shopping.
is this where I say thank you for the soapbox back
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Old 11-30-2007, 08:59 AM   #40
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lol, lefse. let me put a bow on it first...
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