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Old 06-26-2009, 11:37 PM   #1
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Flirting?

Hey gang, I want to ask most of the ladies how I can tell if some one is flirting or just being nice to you?

I'm so out of the dating loop I don't know when woman are flirting with me or being nice to me. And I've just started to date again so any tips would be helpful.

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Old 06-27-2009, 01:37 AM   #2
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I don't know much about western ladies but as an Indian lady I can tell you if someone being nice to you she will help you, may be she will give you some suggestions but she will not praise you unnecessarily like, "you look good" or "you are handsome" or "you are intelligent" etc.

If she exaggerates your qualities then she is flirting.
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Old 06-27-2009, 07:33 AM   #3
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Chile Chef - Many ladies will when comfortable with you, flirt. Flirting does not imply something exists our than the comfort level to be friends. I can't tell you the number of nice ladies I know that flirt outrageously without further intent than to have fun.

Now if you want indications that they are interested in you, they will find reasons to be near you when it doesn't quite add up to what you expected. For example, the lady that last flirted with me *and* wanted to pursue something further, flirted outrageously with me over the course of an hour or two, and since we were at a wedding reception, stepped past that by saying she felt like dancing, not when the active fun music was playing, but when the slow music came on. Of course, she could have just have felt awkward about her dancing skills, but I think not ;-). That was about the time I made sure she knew I was married, and then asked *her* to dance the next time some fun music came on.

If you want to test the person flirting, ask her if she'd like to go out for coffee "some time"? That way you are not applying any pressure, and if she had no interest in you past the flirting, she'd make an excuse to not accept your invitation politely. If she accepts, and it was a successful meet-up, than towards the end of that get together, ask her it's she'd like to go play putt-putt sometime, or something else equally non-threatening and phrase it in such a manner she can gracefully bow-out. By the time you get to that point, she has given you more clues as to if she is interested in you, or interested in friendship.

Just call me... Dear Bob ,

Bob
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Old 06-27-2009, 08:57 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by radhuni View Post
I don't know much about western ladies but as an Indian lady I can tell you if someone being nice to you she will help you, may be she will give you some suggestions but she will not praise you unnecessarily like, "you look good" or "you are handsome" or "you are intelligent" etc.

If she exaggerates your qualities then she is flirting.
I know I get that all the time Ma'am. and I'm used to that.

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Originally Posted by CasperImproved View Post
Chile Chef - Many ladies will when comfortable with you, flirt. Flirting does not imply something exists our than the comfort level to be friends. I can't tell you the number of nice ladies I know that flirt outrageously without further intent than to have fun.

Now if you want indications that they are interested in you, they will find reasons to be near you when it doesn't quite add up to what you expected. For example, the lady that last flirted with me *and* wanted to pursue something further, flirted outrageously with me over the course of an hour or two, and since we were at a wedding reception, stepped past that by saying she felt like dancing, not when the active fun music was playing, but when the slow music came on. Of course, she could have just have felt awkward about her dancing skills, but I think not ;-). That was about the time I made sure she knew I was married, and then asked *her* to dance the next time some fun music came on.

If you want to test the person flirting, ask her if she'd like to go out for coffee "some time"? That way you are not applying any pressure, and if she had no interest in you past the flirting, she'd make an excuse to not accept your invitation politely. If she accepts, and it was a successful meet-up, than towards the end of that get together, ask her it's she'd like to go play putt-putt sometime, or something else equally non-threatening and phrase it in such a manner she can gracefully bow-out. By the time you get to that point, she has given you more clues as to if she is interested in you, or interested in friendship.

Just call me... Dear Bob ,

Bob
Dear Abby, Err Dear Bob, Here's what happened and you tell me ok?

Ok Last Thursday I was walking out of the Dark room, and I ran into the cleaning lady, I scared her and made her jump, She said normall all the students don't use the darkroom this late even though the darkroom stay's open until 9pm on Thursdays.


So I told the lady I was sorry for scaring her and she said it was quite alright, Then we started talking about the darkroom and the next line she said Well the darkroom stays open Thursday 9pm but I'm here until midnight, She was smiling when she said that.


I just don't know why she would have said the here until midnight.
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Old 06-27-2009, 09:25 AM   #5
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I know I get that all the time Ma'am. and I'm used to that.

Dear Abby, Err Dear Bob, Here's what happened and you tell me ok?

Ok Last Thursday I was walking out of the Dark room, and I ran into the cleaning lady, I scared her and made her jump, She said normall all the students don't use the darkroom this late even though the darkroom stay's open until 9pm on Thursdays.


So I told the lady I was sorry for scaring her and she said it was quite alright, Then we started talking about the darkroom and the next line she said Well the darkroom stays open Thursday 9pm but I'm here until midnight, She was smiling when she said that.


I just don't know why she would have said the here until midnight.
Sounds like a possible "come on" to me. She might have been testing to see if you would take the hook to see if you were at all interested.
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Old 06-27-2009, 09:48 AM   #6
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I would consider that a bit odd. Any female (alone with a stranger), that would suggest that she works past even others being there I would be leery of. I would think there might be some judgment issues with her, and not pursue anything past hi/bye. That wasn't flirting. More likely a poor decision of a come-on under the circumstances.

Just my opinion.

Bob
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Old 06-27-2009, 09:48 AM   #7
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Sounds like a possible "come on" to me. She might have been testing to see if you would take the hook to see if you were at all interested.
I thought so, but I wasn't sure. I've been out of the dating loop too long to know what a come on is unless it's latent come on.



I tell you what though, She wasn't your typical cleaning lady. She was tall, skinny, blond hair, blue eyes, and really dark skin, She was really nice looking.



If I see her again any time soon, I will talk to her some more.
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Old 06-27-2009, 09:51 AM   #8
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Originally Posted by CasperImproved View Post
I would consider that a bit odd. Any female (alone with a stranger), that would suggest that she works past even others being there I would be leery of. I would think there might be some judgment issues with her, and not pursue anything past hi/bye. That wasn't flirting. More likely a poor decision of a come-on under the circumstances.

Just my opinion.

Bob
That's what I though as well Bob, Because she didn't if I was a murder or anything sicker, Sleeze ball or whatever. Although I'm not any of that, as I said in my previous post, she wasn't bad looking at all.
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Old 06-27-2009, 11:25 AM   #9
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I thought so, but I wasn't sure. I've been out of the dating loop too long to know what a come on is unless it's latent come on.



I tell you what though, She wasn't your typical cleaning lady. She was tall, skinny, blond hair, blue eyes, and really dark skin, She was really nice looking.



If I see her again any time soon, I will talk to her some more.

So exactly what is a cleaning woman supposed to look like?

I've seen them in all shapes sizes and ages :-) Even a few rather cute ones, but I normally would not flirt with them as they are on duty when I see them so to speak.

Bob
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Old 06-27-2009, 11:29 AM   #10
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So exactly what is a cleaning woman supposed to look like?

I've seen them in all shapes sizes and ages :-) Even a few rather cute ones, but I normally would not flirt with them as they are on duty when I see them so to speak.

Bob
I'm not exactly sure, Bob. I'm just saying she very attractive for per profession, She could almost be a a sexy bartender, store clerk that works at a clothing shop, so and so on.
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