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Old 12-02-2006, 12:28 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jkath
but God gave us a much greater gift: a wonderful little person, who solely relied upon us for absolutely everything. I'd never trade that for the world!
I`m not a Christian, but I can certainly say Amen to that!
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Old 12-02-2006, 12:30 PM   #12
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I know everyone here has great advise to offer. Kids don't come with instruction manuals. I feel that we're blessed with kids to bring out the best in us (most of the time) and help us grow and mature. When I first met my husband I knew he would be a great father and that we'd be together forever. When you find the right person, you usually don't plan out your kids, they just come and you happily accept it because you know you're with the right person to support you through it all. My husband and I were pregnant through college and pregnant with our second when my DH was going through nursing school. Our third was lucky since we were established in our careers already. We somehow survived and are still raising our 3 kids. I could not imagine my life without our kids. They are our reasons for everything we do.
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If you have much, give of your wealth. If you have little, give of your heart. - Arab proverb
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Old 12-02-2006, 02:01 PM   #13
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Thank you or your insights you dear people! I think I wanted to hear the views of people who were not our parents or in laws. Whe I was sick they wanted to harvest eggs from me, but we said no. We discussed fertility treatment then and decided that the agonies and expence of treatment were not right for us.....so it all might be moot anyway, although I feel fertile, if that means anything, lol.

Very few of our friends who are our age are married, or in steady relationships (we are both 27), those that are are more established I think, financially. Certainly the ones who have babies, I think just two of our couple friends have babies, are much wealthier than us...but if we are waiting for more disposable income it might be a long time....I would want to be fitter but I am working on that anyway :) You have all given us some things to chew over!
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Old 12-02-2006, 02:20 PM   #14
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We discussed fertility treatment then and decided that the agonies and expence of treatment were not right for us.....so it all might be moot anyway, although I feel fertile, if that means anything, lol.
It does, on lots of different levels, and yes, the treatment is Very HARSH! on a par with Chemo

I had this "Feeling" that my wife was still Functional (fertile) irespective of what the "Specialists" said. and you know what? I was Right!
the evidence wakes me up each morning with a Huge Smile and a scream DADDY!!!!
there`s no such thing as the "right Time" either, if you wait for that, you`ll wait forever! beleive me, when it happens you Always manage to find a way
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Old 12-02-2006, 03:56 PM   #15
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Becoming a parent is up to individuals. They have to be in a good financial situation because having children is quite expensive.
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Old 12-02-2006, 05:36 PM   #16
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Guess i could say "Planned? What's that?" I was 18 in grade 12 and SURPRISE---Love him dearly even though he is soon to be 19 and thinks he knows it all and can do all on his own . Two more children followed,but as that marriage fell apart--i declined on his offer for a fourth baby--I'm crazy,but not insane(haha).When my youngest daughter was 11 i found myself once again a mother to be . Telling the father to be just after his 42 birthday-came as a little shock. Our little guy was not planned,but a surprise that happened when being on the pill i became very sick and was put on antibiotics....The shock has worn off and we are enjoying everyday ----except for those days when he gets into the nail polish remover and it removes the paint off the dressers and finish on the computer monitor(yesterday was not a good day)
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Old 12-02-2006, 07:54 PM   #17
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Planned? LOL
Paul came back from Japan after serving 14 months with the Marines as their Corpsman (Medic) We married right away..9 months, 1 hour and 21 minutes and John was born..17 years later our Kevin arrived. Can't decided if we were fast or slow..LOL
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Old 12-02-2006, 11:23 PM   #18
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...we tried for about 8 years and nothing, did the fertility scans etc... she was told it would be "Impossible" to conceive without intervention, and so we went on a 4 year waiting list.
about a year and a half still being on this list, she fell pregnant :)
no intervention needed and Ceratinly NOT "Impossible!" as 2 "specialists" said it would be!
I had to laugh when I read this. We had a couple at my church years ago who were told (after many tries) that it would be impossible for them to conceive a baby. Little did the doctor know that as he was telling her this, she was already pregnant with triplets!

Barbara
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Old 12-03-2006, 12:29 PM   #19
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We simply did the math and figured that if we didn't to attend their high school graduations with canes and walkers that we had probably better get serious! I didn't realize how empty my life was until I had my children. It was like the first 30 years was just preparation for motherhood. I also became permanently vulnerable but have learned to live with that feeling. I have never enjoyed anything as much as being a mother!
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Old 12-03-2006, 04:19 PM   #20
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Well, for us we'd been married a couple of years and decided to stop using birth control. Actually, we rarely used birth control because we both didn't actually care for any! Then our son came. That was 1985, I was 23 and my husband was 25. We knew we wanted another one, and didn't want them further than 3 years apart, so we got busy about a year and change, afterwards. Our daughter was born 3 years, 3 weeks and 3 days after our son. I was 26 and my husband was 28. When our daughter was just shy of 1 year old, I permanently closed shop. Like I said, we really didn't care for birth control and it didn't take much effort for me to start feeling the baby kick. I had 6 pregnancies, obviously there were a few setbacks along the way.
Lulu, my husband and I were young and broke more or less. We both had nice jobs, young as we were. We had a nice apartment, small but nice. We managed to travel a few times in the first two years of marriage. We had a new car. However, we had no money to speak of in the bank, and no real saving plan. But, we both knew that there would never be enough money or enough room or the time every be really right, except the present. We were committed to each other and knew we'd be fine, regardless. We also wanted to be young parents.
So now, 21 years later, my husband and I, though seperated, are financially comfortable and as close to each other as ever. Sure, it would be great to have more money, but I wouldn't change anything we've done along the way.
You'll never really be ready, emotionally and financially. When you discover your pregnant, that's when you suddenly realize you are ready.
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