Funniest/Most Embarrassing Restaurant Experience

[Cooking Goddess]

Remember the first time Julia Roberts met an oyster in "Pretty Woman"? How about "When Harry Met Sally"' Meg Ryan's *ahem* demonstration in the restaurant...Billy Crystal was ready to die. Or a monk serving soup to poor Peter Boyle in "Young Frankenstein"...ouch!

We all have at least one story. The summer I turned 12 my unmarried aunt (who lived with us) decided to take me on her annual vacation to visit cousins in Chicago. Our first full day there my cousin's husband decided to take us to a tres elegante restaurant. Told us to order whatever we wanted - he was a successful plastics chemist in the 1960s. My Mom had been no slacker in introducing me to fine foods, so I ordered a small prime rib. It came with au jus. When they served our dinners a small pitcher of something came along. My ever-helpful aunt decided to pour my au jus on my rib...even though I told her I would do it when I wanted it. Surprise! The waitress had mistakenly picked up another patron's maple syrup for their fritters! Needless to say I was not enjoying the fact that everyone else had their meals and I had to wait for my redo. They were willing to wait but I told them they should enjoy their food that was still hot and fresh while I waited. Everyone got a good laugh - even my disposition improved when my food finally arrived. One of my younger cousins even moved the next pitcher of au jus away from my aunt just to make a point!

FWIW, I got a lot of mileage out of that story for the rest of my aunt's life - and she lived a very long life.

OK you guys, your turns. I bet there are some good ones out there just waiting to be told.

 

[jabbur]

I love lobster but had ever only had lobster tails. Didn't know it came any other way! On our honeymoon at Cape Cod I ordered lobster and was shocked to get the whole animal. I had difficulty eating something that looked like it could get up and walk away! The antennae were especially off-putting to me. I managed to get most of the tail eaten and the waitress asked me if I wanted a box! I politely told her no thank you and she replied
"But there's still a lot of meat left here in the claws" I still declined but I was a bit embarrassed anyway. The next time I ordered lobster I made sure they "took care of it" before it came to my table.

 

[vitauta]

I think I may have told this story somewhere before, but if I did, it bears retelling. a newly married friend of mine and his bride went out to dine at a ritzy restaurant one night. upon finishing their exquisite meal, the young wife asked to have a remaining duck leg packaged up to take with her. the waiter condescendingly replied, 'we don't give out doggie bags at this restaurant.' upon which the young lady stood up, grabbed the duck leg off her dinner plate, shook it at the waiter, and countered, 'oh yeah? just watch me!' as she exited the restaurant, with her husband at her side, smiling and supporting her elbow on their way out....

I think he said one of the tables applauded them....

 

[PrincessFiona60]

Okay, we were at the Holiday Inn for our monthly "fancy" meal (this included any meal that was eaten out), I was probably around 7 years old, my two sisters younger. We were behaving and several tables had remarked on our great manners to Mom and Dad as they were leaving. Daddy decided that he just did not recognize the three proper ladies, he decided to stir things up. Our dessert, orange sherbet, in silver dishes on top of paper doilies and plates were brought to us. Just before we took our first bite Daddy whispers loudly, "Don't eat the doilies!" The three of us lost it, laughing full roar. A couple of tables wondered aloud about the rude kids, the waitress told us to ignore them. Dad still has this urge to tell us not to eat the doilies...

 

[simonbaker]

I was 15 & helping out some good friends at an elequant banquet & the last course was flaming banana's foster. As I was serving the last couple of patrons one of the champange glasses of the ice cream slid right into one of the ladies purses. I was extremely embarrased. It just happened that 4 years later I worked part time for the lady while going to college.

 

[taxlady]

Okay, we were at the Holiday Inn for our monthly "fancy" meal (this included any meal that was eaten out), I was probably around 7 years old, my two sisters younger. We were behaving and several tables had remarked on our great manners to Mom and Dad as they were leaving. Daddy decided that he just did not recognize the three proper ladies, he decided to stir things up. Our dessert, orange sherbet, in silver dishes on top of paper doilies and plates were brought to us. Just before we took our first bite Daddy whispers loudly, "Don't eat the doilies!" The three of us lost it, laughing full roar. A couple of tables wondered aloud about the rude kids, the waitress told us to ignore them. Dad still has this urge to tell us not to eat the doilies...

Those people who thought you kids were rude are weird. Kids having a good time in a restaurant is not rude.

 

[taxlady]

I'm reminded of the time I went to a Chinese resto with a several friends. We ordered a bottle of Royal de Neuville, a French, sparkling rose. It comes in a Champagne style bottle with a Champagne style mushroom shaped cork. We did our best not to giggle when the waiter opened the bottle with a cork screw.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

Those people who thought you kids were rude are weird. Kids having a good time in a restaurant is not rude.

This was back in the '60's when kids were seen but not heard.

 

[Addie]

My son Poo and his wife took me to a very nice restaurant that was famous for its seafood. I forget what they ordered, but I ordered Shrimp Scampi. They shrimp were those small ones. Not what I ordered at all, but I said nothing. I went to put my fork into the shrimp and kept having to stab it. They were so overcooked and tough. Then I tried the pasta. The chef poured the alcohol at the last minute and didn't give it a chance to cook off. Now I don't drink and never have. So I can taste alcohol when it is present. I am willing to eat sauces that have alcohol in it, as long as it has been allow to cook off. This was totally not edible. Why not just give me the bottle of booze to guzzle down. I just left my food on my plate and played with it so it looked like I was eating. I ate a lot of bread that meal. (YUK!)

When the waitress came to clear she asked me if anything was wrong with the food. I showed her how hard the shrimp were and the alcohol content. Even my son agreed after tasting it that my complaint about the alcohol was valid. She brought the plate back to the kitchen and told the chef the problem. I look up and standing there at the kitchen door is the whole kitchen staff staring at our table. My son stood up and stared right back at them. (Bless his heart!) We got the whole meal for all three of us on the house. Including their dessert of Tiramisu. And the owner gave my son a pass or ticket for the next time they came the meal would be on the house again. He apoligized for the behavior of the kitchen staff. I wasn't embarrased by them, only amused. I DARED to question the chefs cooking abilities.

 

[buckytom]

i have so many odd or embarassing restaurant experiences, so i'll just start with one. more to come

when i first met my wife (in late november) i had only been dating her a few weeks when i asked her to go to atlantic city with me for new years eve, to stay over with me at a casino/hotel. she agreed, but just days before the holiday, i got into a bar fight in which my nose was broken.

i couldn't pick my new girlfriend up with for a special weekend away with me having a swollen nose and raccoon eyes, so i went to bloomingdales to the clinique counter to get cover up makeup.

apparently, my tone is honey glow. lol.

i learned how to dab it on, and figured that i would! just tell her( my eventual wife to be) that my odd look was just that i was tired.

you know, makeup ain't as hard as women will have you believe.

so, while we ate dinner in one of one casino restaurants, the a.c. in the restaurant went out, and the place heated up quickly. i became sweaty pretty fast. not knowing what to do, i just wiped with a napkin.

you shoulda seen her face.

after explaining myself, she kinda understood, but more was impressed at how much effort i put into it, as well as wasn't too sure what she was getting into. lol.

i'm amazed she ever allowed me another date after that.

ok, so up next, why red wine and white dresses don't match.

 

[Cooking Goddess]

I think I may have told this story somewhere before, but if I did, it bears retelling. a newly married friend of mine and his bride went out to dine at a ritzy restaurant one night. upon finishing their exquisite meal, the young wife asked to have a remaining duck leg packaged up to take with her. the waiter condescendingly replied, 'we don't give out doggie bags at this restaurant.' upon which the young lady stood up, grabbed the duck leg off her dinner plate, shook it at the waiter, and countered, 'oh yeah? just watch me!' as she exited the restaurant, with her husband at her side, smiling and supporting her elbow on their way out....

I think he said one of the tables applauded them....

Excuse me vit, but we're all baring our souls here. What about YOU? The friends' story is nice but what about YOUR story? You have to have one!

Or wait...could it be...were YOU the bride in ^the^ story???

 

[Barbara L]

This was back in the '60's when kids were seen but not heard.

Also back in the '60s when we were driving from California to Missouri, we stopped at a cafe somewhere in Arizona or New Mexico. My sister and I went to the restroom together (I think we were 7 and 8). Imagine the looks we got as we burst out of the restroom yelling, "Mama, Daddy, there's a big black cockroach in the bathroom!"

 

[GotGarlic]

When I was in college, I had a job as a waitress at a restaurant at the Naval Air Station. One evening I was carrying a large tray of dishes and bent over slightly to pick up an empty plate from a table. The dishes on the tray started to slide and it almost tipped over onto a woman's head. As I tried to get control of it, I caught her husband's eye - his eyes widened as he realized what was about to happen. At the last moment, after a big dip, I was able to balance the tray and get back to the kitchen without hurting anyone. Whew!

 

[Claire]

Mine is also as a waitress. A pretty high end steak house. I was bringing a tray of condiments to go with a baked potato, and they slid off my tray, the container of sour cream landing on a woman's (very expensive) shoes.

Once we were at an NCO club for a pizza. That is to say, my parents, my sibs, and a friend. I was 17 or so I think. We waited and waited and waited and .... a waiter appeared with a tray with 7 glasses of ice water, which he proceeded to over-balance and pour down my father's neck. At this point my parents hadn't gotten their drinks, we hadn't gotten our sodas. The only thing the wait staff had brought to our table had been poured down my father's back. My father stood and said that he'd walked out of better places and we all marched out. At the time I was a teenager and it embarassed me. Now, of course, i'd do the same. Not that the kid screwed up, but it had been easily a half hour of no service at all.

 

[Zhizara]

I had a similar experience to Addie's. When I was out to dinner with my husband, celebrating a large tax refund, we went to an unfamiliar place where I ordered a lobster.

When it was served, it stunk. It had gone bad, it certainly hadn't been alive when it was cooked. The cook came out and tried to argue with me that it was good, but I know bad seafood when I smell it.

We left. I wasn't about to make myself sick or give the argumentative cook another chance at me.

 

[Addie]

I had a similar experience to Addie's. When I was out to dinner with my husband, celebrating a large tax refund, we went to an unfamiliar place where I ordered a lobster.

When it was served, it stunk. It had gone bad, it certainly hadn't been alive when it was cooked. The cook came out and tried to argue with me that it was good, but I know bad seafood when I smell it.

We left. I wasn't about to make myself sick or give the argumentative cook another chance at me.

If you don't know your seafood, then don't order it. The worst day to order it is on a Monday. It is what was unloaded from the boats on Friday, so you know it isn't fresh. Bad seafood can make you so sick, one minute you think you are going to die, and the next you are hoping that you will.

 

[Steve Kroll]

In 2005, we took a trip to Paris for DW's 40th birthday. Also along was our then 12 year old daughter, who we brought with us because we thought it would be educational to expose expose her to new experiences. First night there, we were hungry and a little jet-lagged, so we wandered down the street from the hotel to a place called Le Florimond that had been recommended by guy at the front desk. Noticing that our tourist French was not all that good, he added that the owner and waitstaff spoke decent English, so we shouldn't have any problems.

The restaurant turned out to be a nice little place. Bright and cheery and not too expensive. I ordered the veal special and Mrs. K had a chicken dish. Our daughter looked at the menu and asked "What is crepinette de veau?" Taking a guess, I told her that "crepinette" sounded like some sort of small crepe, and that I was pretty certain "veau" was veal.

When the waiter came to take our order, our daughter proudly announced she would have the crepinette de veau. The waiter sort of paused and gave my wife and I a look that said "are you sure?" When he got nothing but puzzled looks back from us, he then asked our daughter "You do know that you are ordering sweetbreads?"

I looked across the able at her and, trying not to raise too much of a panic, said "I'm not sure you would like that, honey."

Well, I think all she heard were the words "sweet" and "bread" and thought it sounded wonderful. So she said "yes, that's what I would like."

A short while later, out comes a plate covered with little fried chunks of veal brains/glands/parts slathered in brown gravy. The look on her face was priceless. She asked "What is this? Where are my crepes?" (We found out later that "crepinette" mean "folds", as in the folds of brain tissue. Go figure.)

I have to admit that she was a real trooper. Even after I explained to her that her dinner was made from a baby cow's organs, she said she would try to eat it anyway.

I think she had two bites before I traded her for my veal cutlet. I couldn't really be mad at her, because it was my poor French that caused the problem. As it turned out, the dish itself wasn't bad at all. Kind of a weird texture, but good flavor. Just goes to show that a little gravy makes almost anything edible.

She told the story to her class the following week, and she still tells it to this day.

 

[Barbara L]

Mine is also as a waitress. A pretty high end steak house. I was bringing a tray of condiments to go with a baked potato, and they slid off my tray, the container of sour cream landing on a woman's (very expensive) shoes...

I was on the receiving end of a server's slip, but fortunately it landed on my casual pants and not on expensive shoes.

Some friends treated me to lunch at a Chinese restaurant. When we were almost finished the server was clearing some dishes and dropped a big cup of bright red/orange sweet and sour sauce into my lap. She was so worried, and my friends were looking at me like they expected me to explode. I saw it for what it was, an accident, and spent most of the time reassuring the poor girl that it was an accident and was everything was ok.

 

[jharris]

I was on the receiving end of a server's slip, but fortunately it landed on my casual pants and not on expensive shoes.

Some friends treated me to lunch at a Chinese restaurant. When we were almost finished the server was clearing some dishes and dropped a big cup of bright red/orange sweet and sour sauce into my lap. She was so worried, and my friends were looking at me like they expected me to explode. I saw it for what it was, an accident, and spent most of the time reassuring the poor girl that it was an accident and was everything was ok.

You are a class act Barb.

Thumbs up!

 

[Barbara L]

You are a class act Barb.

Thumbs up!

Awwww! Thank you. I just try to treat others how I would like to be treated.