"Discover Cooking, Discuss Life."

Go Back   Discuss Cooking - Cooking Forums > The Back Porch > Off Topic Discussions
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 03-30-2008, 12:14 AM   #71
Master Chef
 
Chief Longwind Of The North's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: USA,Michigan
Posts: 9,229
For poison ivy, poison oak, or poison sumack to be effective, the plant oils that are contained in the leaves need to come into contact with the skin. And even then, if you wash quickly with plenty of water, and a good grease-cutting soap, like Dawn Dish detergent, the chances of irritation is minimal. I and a host of boy scouts found ourselves literally wrestling in poison ivy, in our swim suits. When our scoutmaster saw what was happening, he ordered us into the lake (Lake Superior). Not one of us were affected in any way.

Bucky, this rain slicker and broad brimmed rain hat will protect you. Sorry 'bout the color. I know the bright yellow makes us look jaundiced, but we're not posing for pictures anyhoo.

Now, let's see. They're throwing potentially irritating chemicals our way, via poison ivy plants. Hmmmm. Naw, we can't do that. There are kids in the house. What say we just set up the water canon and douse them with ice water. We'll fill up the house, flush 'em out into the open, where we can hit them up close and personal with the skunk juice.

Seeeeeeeya; Goodweed of the North
__________________

__________________
“No amount of success outside the home can compensate for failure within the home…"

Check out my blog for the friendliest cooking instruction on the net. Go ahead. You know you want to.- http://gwnorthsfamilycookin.wordpress.com/
Chief Longwind Of The North is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-30-2008, 11:56 AM   #72
Sous Chef
 
B'sgirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Utah
Posts: 863
Quote:
Originally Posted by Goodweed of the North View Post
Bucky, this rain slicker and broad brimmed rain hat will protect you. Sorry 'bout the color. I know the bright yellow makes us look jaundiced, but we're not posing for pictures anyhoo.
Says who? We've got satellites. How do you think we are going to override all your sound equipment with old Rod Stewart tunes?

Maverick, as for the water balloons, they seem to have a solution for the poisons. We may have to resort to sending vast quantities of termites their way. Are their any pests that can seriously damage cooking equipment? I think we need to invest in some of those. We can send aphids, slugs, and grasshoppers to take care of their gardens. I seem to have a poison-resistant variety in mine we can send them.
__________________

__________________
Michelle
http://foodmakeshimsick.blogspot.com/

B'sgirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-30-2008, 12:18 PM   #73
Master Chef
 
expatgirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Texas girl living in Kazakhstan
Posts: 5,575
You two cowboys amaze me..............still riding off into the sunset..........
__________________
The only difference between a "cook" and a "Chef" is who cleans up the kitchen.
expatgirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-31-2008, 12:19 AM   #74
Chef Extraordinaire
 
buckytom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: My mountain
Posts: 18,750
Quote:
Originally Posted by Goodweed of the North View Post
That polka music is dangerous though. We'll have to pick up some noise-cancelling headphones.
Seeeeeeeeya; Goodweed of the North

i say we just go with it.

up for a polka, gw?

deeeeeeeee deeeeeeeee deet
diddley diddley
deet diddley diddley...

we'll just wait 'em out, that's the best part of a seige.

lol about the hot dogs. that's exactly what i was thinking.

just think mav; if you eat or spray just about anything with artificial flavors or fragrances, it was made with the water downstream from where umm, the effluence shall we say, of my house goes...
__________________
in nomine patri, et fili, et spiritus sancti.


Meh nom eh noh...doot dooooo do do do.
buckytom is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 03-31-2008, 12:53 PM   #75
Master Chef
 
Chief Longwind Of The North's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: USA,Michigan
Posts: 9,229
I'm with ya Bucky. We'll just wait 'em out. They're young and inexperienced at this kind of stuff. Meanwhile, I've got this floorless tent kind of thing. It's a portable ice shack that sets up in a snap. It'll keep whatever off of us while we're cooking. I'll borrow the DW's mini tv/dvd player and bring some tunes. I'm thinking some good hobo dinners, or maybe some brats, or even a pot of chili would be good. You bring the portable fridge and beverages for yourself. I'll be drinking fruit smoothies myself.

And as for our basically unarmed, and unimaginative opponants, I think we should load the trebuchets and start firing. Oh, and I have made a concoction of Gorilla Glue and Vaseline that we can load into the balloons, with a firecracker or two, to create an airburst over their rides. That'll gum up the windows, door handles, etc. Claenaing their cars will keep 'em busy for a while, out in the open, so we have a clear shot with the skunk juice balloons.

And their sattelites, we just have to sample their sending frequencies, fire off a 180 degree out of phase signal to the same sattelites and they have just lost communications. Yep. It's true. I am an Electronic Engineering Technologist (or so says my Bachelor's Degree). It won't be hard to disable these ametures. Besides, we'll be in the tent. They can't photograph what they can't see.

It's so good to have such a wide range of interests. It gives you a lot to draw upon in times like this.

Seeeeeeeya; Goodweed of the North
__________________
“No amount of success outside the home can compensate for failure within the home…"

Check out my blog for the friendliest cooking instruction on the net. Go ahead. You know you want to.- http://gwnorthsfamilycookin.wordpress.com/
Chief Longwind Of The North is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-31-2008, 02:36 PM   #76
Sous Chef
 
B'sgirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Utah
Posts: 863
You are forgetting we have China on our side--the Chinese can override any satellite signal there is out there so you can say goodbye to your DVD player and tunes. And have you heard of those new security x-ray machines? They most certainly will be able to see through your tent.

You'll never hit my car, but I'd appreciate it if you'd aim something really destructive right at my kitchen. Then maybe my insurance would pay for me to replace the badly-built cupboards in there.

And Mav, since they actually seem willing to eat tripe and pig snout, they will probably end up with some nasty stomach worms. We need to cut off their supply of remedies for that sort of thing. And don't let them near any makings for hot sauce. And don't let them tell you we don't have ammo--I've got an unlimited supply of dirty diapers and rags used to clean up vomit from the kid's illness. They'll never survive those. Bwoo-ha-ha!
__________________
Michelle
http://foodmakeshimsick.blogspot.com/

B'sgirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-31-2008, 06:59 PM   #77
Master Chef
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Cicero, IL
Posts: 5,093
If the polka doesn't stop em, just hand me a guitar, that screeching will stop anything! Then there is my singing, been known to cause all kinds of maladies and seizures...
I say our best bet is to hire a couple of chefs and just feed em their favorite foods non-stop until they're too stuffed to move anymore.
Don't worry about yer car B'sgirl, that is what a garage is for, LOL. Put it in there and it will be nice and safe.
But I agree, if they are gonna aim anything destructive at us, it better hit my bathroom and my kitchen! And if all else fails, send the Chinese out with their pots and pans and instructions to take anything they find and turn into food to serve GW and BT!
__________________
Maverick2272 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2008, 12:47 PM   #78
Master Chef
 
Chief Longwind Of The North's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: USA,Michigan
Posts: 9,229
You must have AMATURE stamped on your foreheads. For the X-Ray machine to work, first, you must get very close as x-rays are a form of electro-magnetic energy where the strength of the beam attenuates by the square of the distance. I can gaurantee that you won't get very close. As for the food (tripe and such), I need only freeze it to below -10 F. to kill off tapeworms, or heat it to 160 to kill off any other little nasties. And since the hot dogs will be cooked to an internal temp of about 190' F, I'd say we've got nothing to worry about.

And those diapers and such don't have the mass/volume ratio to hurl to our distance. Friction with the air will overcome their inertia long before they reach us. You will simply end up with a yard full of dirty diapers.

Oh, and the Chinese are a very proud and noble society. They wouldn't hook up with you. They would dismiss your efforts as foolilshness. And besides, between BT and myself, we can cook up whatever kind of food suits their pallate, and then some. And you know what they say, an army lives on its stomach. All you have to offer is twinkies and spam! Ahhhahahahah!

One more thing, our entertainment is a function of on-site DVD's and CD's rather than airwaves, so their is nothing to jam. We create the signal on-site and pump it through speakers. And you don't know the physical properties of wave propagation enough to know how to neutralize our sound that's directed at you. But I know how to stop yours, and have the necessary equipment in place. And as BT said, we can deal with polkas.

And that electric guitar only works when there's electricity. I also know how to shut that off, as well as your phone service. It's handy that I do that kind of stuff for a living, wouldn't you say?

But you talk a good game. You just need to take a few physics and electronics classes to back it all up, say 4 to 6 years worth.

Hey Bucky, you got the grill fired up yet? I'm gonna be firing off the first salvo in a few. I think we should celebrate with some surf 'n turf. The beverages are iced. That's a great mini fridge you brought out. And I'm impressed that it uses solar radiation to replace the propane flame that would normally drive the fridge. But that propane tank secured in your work trailor is sure gonna come in handy at night.

Tell me, if Mav and crew bring us lobster, is that good enough to call off the siege? Or should we really make them pay?

Seeeeeeeeya; Goodweed of the North
__________________
“No amount of success outside the home can compensate for failure within the home…"

Check out my blog for the friendliest cooking instruction on the net. Go ahead. You know you want to.- http://gwnorthsfamilycookin.wordpress.com/
Chief Longwind Of The North is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2008, 02:41 PM   #79
Sous Chef
 
B'sgirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Utah
Posts: 863
Quote:
Originally Posted by Goodweed of the North View Post
Oh, and the Chinese are a very proud and noble society. They wouldn't hook up with you. They would dismiss your efforts as foolilshness. And besides, between BT and myself, we can cook up whatever kind of food suits their pallate, and then some. And you know what they say, an army lives on its stomach. All you have to offer is twinkies and spam! Ahhhahahahah!Seeeeeeeeya; Goodweed of the North
Now there is where you are wrong, the Chinese are already on my side. I've had one of their spies stationed at my house for the last 8 months and they certainly do not dismiss our efforts as foolishness.

And never mind the density of the diapers, I'm quite confident they will hit their target just fine. You might as well have a chunk of a neutron star thrown at you. Hmmm, that gives me an idea....
__________________
Michelle
http://foodmakeshimsick.blogspot.com/

B'sgirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2008, 05:17 PM   #80
Master Chef
 
Chief Longwind Of The North's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: USA,Michigan
Posts: 9,229
Hey BT. Maybe we otta get something a little more sturdy than my tent.

Seeeeeeeya; Goodweed of the North
__________________

__________________
“No amount of success outside the home can compensate for failure within the home…"

Check out my blog for the friendliest cooking instruction on the net. Go ahead. You know you want to.- http://gwnorthsfamilycookin.wordpress.com/
Chief Longwind Of The North is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



» Discuss Cooking on Facebook

Our Communities

Our communities encompass many different hobbies and interests, but each one is built on friendly, intelligent membership.

» More about our Communities

Automotive Communities

Our Automotive communities encompass many different makes and models. From U.S. domestics to European Saloons.

» More about our Automotive Communities

Marine Communities

Our Marine websites focus on Cruising and Sailing Vessels, including forums and the largest cruising Wiki project on the web today.

» More about our Marine Communities


Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:02 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.