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Old 09-08-2008, 12:49 AM   #21
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Barb L you are too much. Hand them the remote indeed. My dad went to bed at 9 pm ever night of his life he did not care who was there he went to bed. Then every body took the hint.
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Old 09-08-2008, 04:20 AM   #22
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Sometimes I look at my watch and say "Heavens, I didn't know it was so late! I'm so sorry for keeping you here so long but I was just enjoying your visit and the time got away from me! Let me walk you to the car so you can get home to bed." Of course, this only works for people who have some social sensitivity. For those that don't, I apologize for having to end the evening but tell them that I turn into a pumpkin at 10 o'clock!
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Old 09-08-2008, 07:23 AM   #23
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I feel your pain. I have a friend or something like that who lives about 2 hours away. She always tries to make plans that include her and her husband staying overnight. I don't mind getting together but not always for a weekend. To watch them sit here on a Sunday morning, reading the paper and I have no idea when they intend to leave. Since neither of them work, they don't realize the value of a Sunday is to me. I usually just beg off with an excuse. I shy away from friendships that just cause me stress.
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Old 09-08-2008, 12:32 PM   #24
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It is now the morning after. Yikes, what a night.

Just about the time I'm looking around for a "blunt object" with which to throttle him, he hands me one! A pound of silver as a gift. One of those giant proof coins.

So, I folded like a box-kite hitting a stone patio. While the girls talked, he asked for a "few knives" that needed sharpening, and oh yes, could I polish them with paste and glass. And he looked over each one like he was paying for them.

I hadn't eaten, I knew my wife had to eat with her thyroid meds, so like a big dummy I ask if anyone else is hungry. We drive up the street to a Chinese restaurant my wife and I enjoy (inside the zone of a banger shooting gallery) and eat and talk and putz and wool-gather and wile away the hours until it's 10:30PM on my wife's school night. (She's a teacher.)

We get back to my house to gather up his stuff, and he sees my nakiri laying on the bamboo board. He looks up nonchalantly and asks, "Are these business related or personal?"

I use a biker epithet outlining that everything I have is for sale, except the motorcycle and the wife. He shrugs, and asks, "Take a check?"

As they leave, his POSILQ (person of opposite sex in living quarters) gives me a big hug, and they fade into the evening.

I have a gift, dinner, and a profit. Why does he do this to me? And for a kink in the keester, I really like him.

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Old 09-08-2008, 12:42 PM   #25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GB View Post
It might sound corny, but honesty is the best policy. It might not be the easiest policy, but it is the only way to get your needs addressed correctly. Tell your guest that you would love to have him over, but you need to call it a night by x o'clock. Direct honesty is the best way to go.
LOL....it's rare I agree with GB...rotf. But he hit the nail on the head with this one. It was exactly what I was thinking reading this thread.
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Old 09-08-2008, 12:52 PM   #26
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Jeekinz, oh, I have no problem with honestly stating my true feelings, in fact my wife would be happy if I just shut up once in a while.

And since retirement I have no impulse control whatsoever. I mean, here I am a tinker in the land of chefs. How many weeks I have gone here without a ban? Astounding!

The crux here is that this is a really good friend. And to a biker, I would consider him a bro in all of the traditional descriptions. And let's be honest, I probably drive him nuts.

I know that I can never have my own way 24/7, but sometimes this feeling wells up, and I cannot shake it.

The sad thing is that I am going to have to deal with this--if I want to keep our friendship and care for my wife under the new circumstances. It's a tightrope to walk. Perhaps that's the thing I hate.
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Old 09-08-2008, 12:55 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by Chico Buller View Post
Jeekinz, oh, I have no problem with honestly stating my true feelings, in fact my wife would be happy if I just shut up once in a while.

And since retirement I have no impulse control whatsoever. I mean, here I am a tinker in the land of chefs. How many weeks I have gone here without a ban? Astounding!

The crux here is that this is a really good friend. And to a biker, I would consider him a bro in all of the traditional descriptions. And let's be honest, I probably drive him nuts.

I know that I can never have my own way 24/7, but sometimes this feeling wells up, and I cannot shake it.

The sad thing is that I am going to have to deal with this--if I want to keep our friendship and care for my wife under the new circumstances. It's a tightrope to walk. Perhaps that's the thing I hate.
There are a whole bunch of words here, but none of them address why you could not just be honest with him and tell him you need him out of your house by a certain time.
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Old 09-08-2008, 01:07 PM   #28
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There are a whole bunch of words here, but none of them address why you could not just be honest with him and tell him you need him out of your house by a certain time.
If you read between the lines, he's too nice for his own good! lol
I 'm guilty of the same thing! sad but true!
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Old 09-08-2008, 01:26 PM   #29
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GB, if you grew up in that environment, you learn the ropes of that group.

For example, there is a world of difference between a friend and a bro. You might not like the bro or what he does. But he is part of what you consider an extended family. You have taken on that responsibility.

You must have a no-brother-good-inlaw that drives you nuts and drinks up all of your good single malt. But your wife loves him, deep inside he's an alright guy, so you cut him slack as you would for no one else.

Then again, you have a friend who is a confidant, the kind of guy who is always welcome for the big-screen and a Packer game.

This guy drives me nuts. I don't know how to resolve it. Frankly, deep inside, I'm hot sure I can or want to.
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Old 09-08-2008, 01:37 PM   #30
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I know exactly what you are talking about. My wife has this girl friend, I'm friends with her husband, oh, well, I think I'm more friends with her actually than with him. He is the nicesest man you'll ever meat, but her, I can't stand her. She is the loudest, never leaves, always invites her self over at the most inappropriate times. I do like her, but I hate her. I think I hate my self around her. Because I can never say "no" and she doesn't get it. She has no class what so ever, but she really is very funny, it's like a free cloun at the party. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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