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Old 01-29-2014, 03:05 AM   #11
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Mamma is home!! Oh, such a long journey for her. She feels well, and Papa is so happy to have her back............She sends her best to all of you!
Such a relief for you to know your Mamma made it safely. Now you make sure she isn't a stranger around here now that she's back home. You know we'll still want to see posts from her.
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Old 01-29-2014, 03:14 AM   #12
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Thank you, Laurie! I was so worried about the fog. I know what it is there.

With love,
~Cat
We get bad fog here so I understand. In fact, it has been foggy lately and I just don't drive in it.
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Old 01-29-2014, 08:35 AM   #13
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I'm glad they make it home safely, Cat. I think the American kids can't wait to get away from their families because they want to experiment with things their parents don't allow them to do. But when something goes wrong, then they turn to their parents who are waiting in the wings to pick them up.

When I moved into my own apartment, I stayed out until 5 AM the first 2 weekends. Having a curfew at 25 years old was my worst problem living at home. But after I didn't have anyone telling me not to stay out, it lost it's appeal and I was back to a more reasonable time schedule. I think it was knowing I could do it if I wanted to. Also, I think since my mother didn't know what I was doing, she didn't worry as much.
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Old 01-29-2014, 12:25 PM   #14
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I'm glad they make it home safely, Cat. I think the American kids can't wait to get away from their families because they want to experiment with things their parents don't allow them to do. But when something goes wrong, then they turn to their parents who are waiting in the wings to pick them up.

When I moved into my own apartment, I stayed out until 5 AM the first 2 weekends. Having a curfew at 25 years old was my worst problem living at home. But after I didn't have anyone telling me not to stay out, it lost it's appeal and I was back to a more reasonable time schedule. I think it was knowing I could do it if I wanted to. Also, I think since my mother didn't know what I was doing, she didn't worry as much.
Mamma worries when I sleep, I think! I'm the only child and very far away, so obviously I believe perhaps her "worry factor" is quite high, yes?

This is something I don't understand. If you do things your parents don't want you to do, how do you face them? Especially when they are spending very much money on you and trusting you to be responsible? This is wrong, I think.

Then if you're doing things like that, how do you have fun? There has to be some type of structure and order and discipline, yes? If there isn't this, how would you grow up properly? Right now I'm too immature to be out alone, and I know this. I'm so grateful DA had a use for me! I don't think I'd be happy in the dorm with all that noise and those dumb parties. I think I'd be afraid to be alone in an apartment.

Is this what is called a cultural difference? Or is it how I am being raised or perhaps both? It's so confusing. I get along so much better with older people who are much smarter than me, and the reason I love Carl and Laki is because they're very smart and sensible. I get along very well with young children also because they are precious and fun and sometimes I can teach them little things.

Sometimes I feel like I just can't connect to most people my age. I can't become involved with their activities, and I don't want to, because I do know they are probably doing things their parents don't approve of, yes?

Life is confusing sometimes. But I do know I can look my family in their faces because I'm trying to be correct. I fail them, I'm sure, sometimes, but at least I don't have to keep anything secret from them.

Not any more, since I told Mamma I was scared to come here!

Somehow, telling her that made everything just fine. Parents are odd.

With love,
~Cat
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Old 01-29-2014, 01:04 PM   #15
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If you do things your parents don't want you to do, how do you face them? Especially when they are spending very much money on you and trusting you to be responsible? This is wrong, I think.
I don't believe for a minute that acting against the wishes of parents or other authority figures is unique to this country. In fact, I know it isn't, as I have friends in London and Switzerland who have gone through the same thing with their own children.

It might be wrong, but it's also human nature. I would think it would be more unusual to NOT want to rebel a little. My own daughter, who is a wonderful and very mature young lady, had a period in her life where she didn't want to listen to her parents. But in the end, her rebellious period taught her that we weren't wrong about some of the things we told her. She just had to find out for herself.
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Old 01-29-2014, 01:49 PM   #16
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...
This is something I don't understand. If you do things your parents don't want you to do, how do you face them? Especially when they are spending very much money on you and trusting you to be responsible? This is wrong, I think....
But sometimes they aren't trusting their child to be responsible. They assume that the child won't be responsible.

My mother was the kind of person who felt that she knew what was best for everyone. She tried to control people "for their own good". It drove me crazy. I moved from Copenhagen to Montreal. My relationship with my mother improved with that much distance between us. Short visits were improved.

Many years later, while talking to her on the phone, I said, "I love you Mommy. I realize that you have always been the best parent you knew how to be." She misunderstood and replied, "I'm glad you finally understand that I was right."
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Old 01-29-2014, 05:44 PM   #17
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She's leaving me, and honestly I hate this. Yes, I know, I have to grow up, I have responsibilities, I can't let emotions get to better me and all that.

I helped her pack up her things. Carl has made arrangements tomorrow to drive us to the airport because I might be too upset. I hate being brave and I told Mamma this. I told her I didn't want her to leave and then I was a stupid baby and cried.

She hugged me, and we sat on the bed and we talked. For the first time, I learned how she had cried for days and days and days after sending me here. She told me Papa had tears at times also.

I never knew this. They were so calm and told me I was to come here to take care of DA and receive my education, and there was no argument, no choice, and that was all. I accepted this but they never showed me any emotions except to tell me to do this.

I didn't know until now. I hate growing up. It all gets so confusing. For young people such as me, we are pulled in so very, very many directions. We must take care of our family members, we have to deal with family issues such as a new fishing vessel, we must keep our grades up, we must put aside our own romantic feelings for the better good.

I'm sorry. I am complaining. I just feel a bit overwhelmed and I hate losing Mamma.

I'm so glad Carl will be there.

With love,
~Cat
You'll miss her horribly but it won't be forever and you can Skype and send emails (do you have a web cam on your computer?) It won't be long before you can see her and Papa again.

"Chin up" as we say over here when someone needs cheering up.

Don't forget, you've got us.
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Old 01-29-2014, 05:52 PM   #18
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Having a curfew at 25 years old was my worst problem living at home. .
Worse than that, if my parents were away overnight I had a babysitter (usually grandmother) until I was EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD!!!!

Mind you, if I had children now I think I'd have their feet nailed to the floor until they were 30 let alone 18!
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Old 01-29-2014, 05:55 PM   #19
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Worse than that, if my parents were away overnight I had a babysitter until I was EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD!!!!

Mind you, if I had children now I think I'd have their feet nailed to the floor until they were 30 let alone 18!
My mom made me stay with my grandma if my parents went away when I was in high school! Highly insulting to me at the time (but very wise now that I think about it).
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Old 01-29-2014, 06:03 PM   #20
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I don't believe for a minute that acting against the wishes of parents or other authority figures is unique to this country. In fact, I know it isn't, as I have friends in London and Switzerland who have gone through the same thing with their own children.

It might be wrong, but it's also human nature. I would think it would be more unusual to NOT want to rebel a little. My own daughter, who is a wonderful and very mature young lady, had a period in her life where she didn't want to listen to her parents. But in the end, her rebellious period taught her that we weren't wrong about some of the things we told her. She just had to find out for herself.
Oh my! I do understand rebelling. I did that once. I was 16, I think, and the reel on Catina broke and the hook hit me in the head and knocked me out. Papa called for a helicopter and I woke up in time for to see the basket lowered to the deck. I rebelled. I refused to go, and Papa had enough, so he picked me up and put me in the basket and said I was OFF THE BOAT!

I was taken to the hospital in Constanta and the doctors said I had a bad concussion. Papa did know best. I never crossed him again until they came here for the holidays, and I told you all of that. That was different.

Rebelling is scary. It's just easier to know they have my best interests to their hearts and to do right by them. That way, everyone is happy, yes?

With love,
~Cat
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