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Old 07-01-2011, 06:15 AM   #1
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My dad has passed away

I'm sad to say that my dad passed away this morning. His health had been deteriorating the last couple years and the last one was especially bad. It appeared that maybe there was a crack in the clouds but on Monday he was admitted to the ER with a high fever. It appears that he may have developed pneumonia. In the course of treatment his heart stopped twice. His very dedicated doctors & nurses revived him but after years of fighting his body just couldn't take any more; his kidneys had completely failed and his heart, already weakened from a heart attack and congestive heart failure, just couldn't bear the strain of dialysis any longer. With no viable medical options and no chance of a decent quality of life, we were forced to conclude that we loved him too much to put him through any more suffering.

My only consolation is that there was time to gather the entire family to his bedside. He passed quietly in his sleep, surrounded by his loving wife of 43 years, three adoring children, his brother and his wife & many grandkids & nephews. He was ready to go, he just didn't want to go alone. And he didn't.

Dad wasn't much of a cook (depending on if you asked him or us) but he was a life-long sportsman. He was a fanatical fishermen, expert handloader and crack marksmen. He was also an expert sharpener; I think his knife collection (which I will sort thru) contains over 200 very fine blades. Dad forgot more about hunting, fishing and general woods-lore than most people will ever know. His skin was weathered brown like old leather, and a roof never seemed to suit him. He always felt he was born a century too late. He felt the call of nature deep down in his bones. I sorely wish he could have breathed his last under a canopy of stars or knee-deep in a mountain stream holding a fly rod instead of in a hospital bed.

No man that knew him ever had a truer friend and no son or daughter ever had a better father.

The pain is fresh and his loss will no doubt only grow more acute as it sinks in. I was never much for faith, but Dad was. If it's your way I humbly ask for your prayers for him. Please keep him in your thoughts. I know that he's not really gone; his essence will be with me and those who loved him, for as long as we live. I think I finally get that now.

I will close by offering a favorite poem up to Dad. Don't worry, Dad. I won't stand by your grave and weep. You're not in there, you're in my heart.

_________________________ _________________________ ___

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die



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Old 07-01-2011, 06:22 AM   #2
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oh, i'm truely sorry for your loss, rob. that was beautiful what you wrote about him.

he really must have been a great man to have raised such a caring son.

i will say my rosary for him this morning, that he is seated at god's side, knowing how much he was loved.
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Old 07-01-2011, 06:41 AM   #3
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May God bless you and your family during this time of mourning.
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Old 07-01-2011, 07:07 AM   #4
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Sorry to hear of your loss Rob....I know the pain of your loss is numbing ~~ Try to grab hold of just a small bit of the faith that your dad had...Now and in the days to come it will give you a peace and calm that passes all understanding....God bless you and your family during this time....
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Old 07-01-2011, 07:13 AM   #5
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Sorry for your loss Rob. Thank you for sharing such a personal experience. I'm gladdened to hear your Dad had a chance to enjoy the great outdoors.
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Old 07-01-2011, 07:42 AM   #6
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Our thoughts are with you and your family
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Old 07-01-2011, 08:11 AM   #7
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I am so sorry for your loss. May he rest in peace.
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Old 07-01-2011, 08:18 AM   #8
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Rob, the memories don't fade, but over time, the pain does.

Thoughts and hugs your way....
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Old 07-01-2011, 08:52 AM   #9
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I am so sorry for your loss, my thoughts and prayers with you and your family.
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Old 07-01-2011, 09:13 AM   #10
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I am very sorry to hear of your loss. May God bless and be with you and your family.
We will keep you in our prayers.
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Old 07-01-2011, 09:27 AM   #11
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I am so sorry Rob! He was a great man. I did not know him, but the evidence is in the son he raised.
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Old 07-01-2011, 09:54 AM   #12
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So sorry for your loss, Rob. and what a sweet story you told of him. Hold those memories close as you give yourself both permission and time to mourn. (It isn't over in a week.)

As time goes by, I think you will find him on your shoulder whenever you're facing a challenging situation. He will, as always, be urging you on to success.

Sending you hugs, and will remember him, you and your family in my prayers.

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Old 07-01-2011, 10:01 AM   #13
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I am deeply sorry for your loss, Rob. Thank you for sharing a little bit about him. In the times to come thoughts of your dad will bring a smile to your face and a warmth to your heart.

Our thoughts are with you.
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Old 07-01-2011, 10:39 AM   #14
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Your Dad sounds like a pretty amazing man Rob. Losing a father hurts so much, I'm so sorry. I said a prayer this morning for you before posting. I just want you to know that whenever you feel like you want to share more about your Dad we'd love to hear about him.
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Old 07-01-2011, 10:45 AM   #15
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so very sorry to read of your loss

thank you for the beautiful tribute you wrote of your father
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Old 07-01-2011, 11:46 AM   #16
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My condolence, Rob, I believe I would've enjoyed his company on a stream or across a campfire. Take care.

I know the melody for the lyrics you posted. No doubt it will pop into my head now unbidden throughout the day, and next. I will think of you and your family when it does.
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Old 07-01-2011, 03:48 PM   #17
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i'm sorry to hear about the passing away of your dad. from your loving and eloquent eulogy we get a sense of a devoted and loving family man who enjoyed a harmonious unity with nature as well. i'm sure his passing causes a painful sense of loss in you, and i am very sorry for your suffering. the best dad's never get to live long enough. they do however, leave behind the very best essences of themselves in their beloved sons with which to carry on. your dad will continue to live on in your heart, as you said, and so long as that memory of the heart endures, your dad will never leave you in the only way that has ever really mattered. peace be with you and yours during these difficult times.
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Old 07-01-2011, 04:23 PM   #18
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So sorry to hear of your dad's passing. My deepest sympathies. What beautiful words you wrote.
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Old 07-01-2011, 04:26 PM   #19
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May your warm memories give you comfort at this time of sorrow. My thoughts are with you.
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Old 07-01-2011, 04:33 PM   #20
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Rob the pain will fade and peace will comfort you in your time of sorrow. Hold all the dear memories close to you and remember to hope and believe.
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