My friend is very ill.

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kadesma said:
babe, treasure the wind chimes and Hummingbird feeder..She is lucky to have a friend who loves her as you do. I know how this hurts and I pray for the three of you each day. I'll pray that the LORD watches over her and does what he thinks best. Hold her memory close babe she loved you as you love her.
kades
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you are so sweet, made me tear up. i cry at the drop of hat right now. thank up:(
 
babetoo said:
thanks june. the hospital has completed it's job to write my friend off. with the brain injury they caused and now the drugs they are giving her, she is reduced to a vegetable.

she doesn't know anyone, including her daughter. i am resigned that i will never see my friend again. everything reminds me of her. my wind chimes were a gift from her so when i hear them, i think of her. she gave me a hummingbird feeder for my birthday. such a thoughtful person. when i bake cupcakes i think of her. she gave me the silicone pans. .

pray that wallie will go peacefully , she might as well be dead, in the condition she is in. there is not hope it will ever get better.
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babetoo, the way I read this is, life makes it little easier to accept our loss. It somehow takes away the pain when we are reminded of the days we had with our loved ones. May be these things were given to help you find solace in your days ahead. The memories are so valuable and I am told that memories from long ago are remembered more than recent ones. This all must have something to do with life.

Hearing you say that you would rather be at rest than in the state she is in is a true sign of the love you have for her. Just like with my dogs, sad comparison but true, when they are no longer 'living' the way they should the vet will put them down. I would want someone to be 'living' than laying in a state of not knowing.

I thank you babetoo, for sharing your thoughts w/us. In some way, having others assure you that they are grieving with you helps. I am sure Thomas is of some consolation also. He knows what is going on. Just having him be near is great help. My prayers are with both you and wallie. Please keep in touch and take special care of yourself. wallie would want you to. do it for her. May God grant you peace whenever the day comes. let go, and let God!
 
babetoo said:
thanks june. the hospital has completed it's job to write my friend off. with the brain injury they caused and now the drugs they are giving her, she is reduced to a vegetable.

she doesn't know anyone, including her daughter. i am resigned that i will never see my friend again. everything reminds me of her. my wind chimes were a gift from her so when i hear them, i think of her. she gave me a hummingbird feeder for my birthday. such a thoughtful person. when i bake cupcakes i think of her. she gave me the silicone pans. .

pray that wallie will go peacefully , she might as well be dead, in the condition she is in. there is not hope it will ever get better.
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I'm new here and I'm so sorry for your loss. You have had a lifetime with her and I hope you have lots of fond memories of her.
 
thank you so much leeniek. yes i do have many very fond memories of our times together. she always laughed at my jokes. i teased her a lot. about being so short and skinny.

my granddaughter called this am . her other grandma fell and broke her hit. we are dropping like flies here in so. calif.

thanks again for your kindness and welcome to dc.
 
now i am really heart broken. have not seen wallie since she was moved to this hospital. it is in another town and transportation almost impossible. her daughter sent me a e mail with photo she took this a.m. i wish i had not opened it. she looks a hundred years old and is obviously out of it. my friend is gone, and i will miss her more than i can say.
 
Wyogal said:
Are there "patient advocates" in the area?
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i am sure there are. it is hard to get anything done via her daughter. she is mostly hell bent to a lawsuit. she has contacted a funeral home and her mom is not gone yet. she wanted to be cremated and i can to some extent understand her need to be prepared.

she argues with me over anything i suggest about a second opinion dr. she rants and raves about lawsuits.

she says she wanted everyone to see how her mom was. don't have a clue why. maybe the drama of it. i told her i could not visit. didn't want to see my friend like that. she made sure i did. i opened the e-mail , it had to title so did not know what it was about. i am so upset and depressed today. :(
 
wallie is back in icu. they took trac. out and she aspirated again. that makes three times. her daughter did not approve the removal of the trac. it has now been almost four months since the surgery. this can't have a happy ending.
 
oh dear, prayers going out to your friend, and you...
Can you contact a patient advocate? Because it's not about her daughter.
 
babetoo said:
i am sure there are. it is hard to get anything done via her daughter. she is mostly hell bent to a lawsuit. she has contacted a funeral home and her mom is not gone yet. she wanted to be cremated and i can to some extent understand her need to be prepared.

she argues with me over anything i suggest about a second opinion dr. she rants and raves about lawsuits.

she says she wanted everyone to see how her mom was. don't have a clue why. maybe the drama of it. i told her i could not visit. didn't want to see my friend like that. she made sure i did. i opened the e-mail , it had no title so did not know what it was about. i am so upset and depressed today. :(
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just fixed a mistake
 
Babe - I'd sit quietly, and hold you hand right now if I could... I feel for you, and send what positive thoughts I can.

Bob
 
goodweed, i am so sad to say but she will never be well. to much damage to the lungs from aspirating three times. when the took the trac. out she coded. now she is back on ventilator. they are saying they will hold her room seven days. she is in icu now. after seven days they would send to another town that is a lengthly drive away.her daughter says she would only be able to go once a week. does not feel she can stay on top of things that way. i frankly think they are trying to kill her or at least hurry up death. that to me was why they took trac. out, now say they can't get in back in. makes me crazy . thanks for your kind words
 
just got off the phone. some good news, my friend Wallie is now able to swallow. she had applesauce, first food in six months. daughter said she is more lucid. they took her off so many drugs and she is more alert. not a miracle but it is positive progress.
 
babetoo said:
just got off the phone. some good news, my friend Wallie is now able to swallow. she had applesauce, first food in six months. daughter said she is more lucid. they took her off so many drugs and she is more alert. not a miracle but it is positive progress.
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Yes, it IS good news, Babe. The miracle is that they finally took her off some of those meds she probably didn't need in the first place.

Prayers for both of you continue.
 
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