Originally Posted by CatPat
I am not Russian. In our family, we do not do this. It is a tradition of our family and this seems very odd. One does not give a couple gifts or money for it is of the bride to bring of the things of the household and it is of the groom to bring the home. These are how a couple starts with.
The wedding is a celebration of the ceremony, food and dancing.
I think I understand your tradition Cat. It is very similar to the German tradition. When Mrs D and I got married she brought her dowry, which were plates, pots and pans, bedding, towels etc. Things that were given to her over the years to plan for her marriage.
I provided the housing, which I did, and all the associated things like gardening tools, the car and repair tools.
In Germany, a church marriage isn't legal. You have to get married at the Rathaus (City Hall in front of the Burgermeister) first. Normally on a Friday, then if you wish on Saturday you can have a church wedding.
We didn't do the church wedding part.
On the Friday evening after the Rathaus ceremony, everyone goes to a local Gasthaus for a big meal and partying but no presents are exchanged or expected from the guests.
The bride and groom are expected to be the last to leave and normally just family will drop an envelope to the bride containing money as a gift, as they leave to go home. Sometimes very close neighbors will also drop off an envelope.
In America, much like Canada, it isn't anything close to the European tradition.
Gifts, before the wedding, and during, are very much part of the celebration here.
Something to get used to.