"Discover Cooking, Discuss Life."

Go Back   Discuss Cooking - Cooking Forums > The Back Porch > Off Topic Discussions
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 04-01-2008, 02:37 PM   #1
Sous Chef
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Dansville NY
Posts: 859
New Diet

The next time someone asks you a dumb question wouldn't you like to
>>>>> respond

>>>>> like this?.....

>>>>>

>>>>> Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for Athena

>>>>> the wonder dog at Wal-Mart and was about to check out. A woman

>>>>> behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an

>>>>> elephant? So since I'm retired, with little to do, on impulse, I

>>>>> told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the

>>>>> Purina Diet again.

>>>>>

>>>>> Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital

>>>>> the last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an

>>>>> intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices

>>>>> and IVs in both arms.

>>>>>

>>>>> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way

>>>>> that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and

>>>>> simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food

>>>>> is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have

>>>>> to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now

>>>>> enthralled with my story.)

>>>>>

>>>>> Horrified , she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the

>>>>> dog food poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff

>>>>> an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.

>>>>>

>>>>> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he

>>>>> was laughing so hard!

>>>>>

>>>>> And Now WAL*MART won't let me shop there anymore.




__________________

__________________
DawnT is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2008, 02:46 PM   #2
Executive Chef
 
miniman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Basingstoke, England
Posts: 4,687
You are so naughty Dawn. Mind you I have the sense of humour to do that as well.
__________________

__________________
miniman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2008, 02:50 PM   #3
Sous Chef
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Dansville NY
Posts: 859
I personally didn't do it but... How many times have I wanted to!!!
__________________
DawnT is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2008, 02:55 PM   #4
Chef Extraordinaire
 
babetoo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: escondido, calif. near san diego
Posts: 14,349
Quote:
Originally Posted by DawnT View Post
I personally didn't do it but... How many times have I wanted to!!!

very clever, dawn. made me laugh.

babe
__________________
"life isn't about how to survive the storm but how to dance in the rain"
babetoo is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



» Discuss Cooking on Facebook

Our Communities

Our communities encompass many different hobbies and interests, but each one is built on friendly, intelligent membership.

» More about our Communities

Automotive Communities

Our Automotive communities encompass many different makes and models. From U.S. domestics to European Saloons.

» More about our Automotive Communities

Marine Communities

Our Marine websites focus on Cruising and Sailing Vessels, including forums and the largest cruising Wiki project on the web today.

» More about our Marine Communities


Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:32 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.