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Old 01-01-2016, 02:02 AM   #1
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New Year's Eve ... LOL!!

Our pastor came to our home for New Year's Eve dinner and board games. He had lost his wife over the summer and they had no children.

Our neighbor is staying with us. She had an unfortunate issue with a used gas stove and a brother-in-law who messed up the connection. That resulted in half her kitchen being blown up and part of her garage.

She is staying with us until her home is repaired.

However, she had inherited her older brother's African Grey/parrot/buzzard creature. Her brother worked in the merchant marines, and when he passed, she got this feathered fiend.

This is the most foul-mouthed parrot I have ever seen. First of all, his name is PeckerHead. Second, he hates everyone.

Our pastor comes in, and the first thing PeckerHead says is, "What the @#$%&!! do you want?!"

He looked at PeckerHead, and replied, "Why the @#$%&!! are you asking me? Shut the @#$%&!! up!!"

Apparently no one had ever talked back to that parrot/buzzard.

We still haven't heard a word from PeckerHead.

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Old 01-01-2016, 08:56 AM   #2
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Yipes. At least your neighbor wasn't injured. The rest of your story is too funny. Better than any fiction at your library.
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Old 01-01-2016, 01:30 PM   #3
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Thanks for the first belly laugh of the new year!!
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Old 01-01-2016, 01:46 PM   #4
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Old 01-01-2016, 05:21 PM   #5
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I think I would have peed my pants laughing so hard,
not sure who would have been funnier CCL,
the bird or your pastor
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Old 01-01-2016, 06:10 PM   #6
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Thanks, CCL. Read it out loud to Glenn and both of us had a wonderful, out loud, belly laugh. Real life is definitely funnier than fiction.
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Old 01-02-2016, 11:21 AM   #7
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That's my kind of bird.

Long live PeckerHead.
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Old 01-02-2016, 11:28 AM   #8
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New Year's Eve ... LOL!!

My mom's grandfather was a sea captain. He would bring home all sorts of exotic pets, including a parrot that could swear like a sailor, and a marmoset that would burrow into her grandma's bun, and sort of lived there in her hair.
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Old 01-03-2016, 12:14 AM   #9
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LOL! Thanks y'all! I'm still laughing.

PeckerHead isn't. Now the only time he opens his mouth is when he's eating.

Also, the cats have come out of hiding, the dog doesn't growl at him any more, and my husband can talk without him yelling, "Shut the @#$%&!! up," or, "Go back to bed, you @#$%&!!"

In his thank-you note we found in our mailbox today, our pastor said how much he appreciated and loved the food and fellowship, how cozy and inviting our home is, then he added this:

"And cussing out that damned bird gave me more joy than anything since Tina passed. I've been looking for an excuse to cuss like that for six months, and oh, what a blessing it was!"

LOL! He was so strong and brave when his wife died, but we could tell he was holding a lot in and he had a small congregation to lead, and he never failed us. Ever.

I can imagine a good cussfest like that may have actually been good for his soul. It worked wonders for ours as well!
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Old 01-03-2016, 12:25 AM   #10
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I loved reading the follow up to your pastor...perfect!

CCL, I must say how much your generous spirit impresses many of us for taking in people in need like you do.
Our thoughts are going to what you did for Cat's family while they were in this country. Have you heard more about how they are doing?
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