Old Venting Thread

[Fisher's Mom]

I am going to have to spend 6 hours min in a car on xmas day to spend a max of 4 hours with family (2 different ones too). If I am "lucky" part of this time will coincide with the serving of a dismal buffet so I wont have to eat a sandwich in the car. x-mas eve when traditionally our good meal is served has been all but canceled and I am unable to go anyway because the "dogs make it too stressful" I have never been a big xmas fan but this one is shaping up especially crummy and if it would not make people angry I would just stay put and forget about it alltogether. My day is basically going to be an effort not to put my own grinchy feelings on the rest of the family. I am TRYING to focus on the good stuff but xmas frankly brings out the worst in me. I think next year I might just take off and go somewhere warm or find a pet friendly ski resort.

Awww, Pancho, I'm so sorry to hear you'll be in the car for so many hours on Christmas. No wonder you're not looking forward to it! I think you're a lovely person to do it at all - I'm not sure I'm that nice. Anyway, you will be in my thoughts and I hope something special and wonderful happens to you this season because you definitely deserve it. Big Hug to you and the dogs!

 

[miniman]

Ever wish you could start your day over and go back to bed and put the covers over your head?

Yes, but unfortunately it is not possible. It helps to take a deep breath, have a break and go back to it with a fresher eye.

 

[jpmcgrew]

Awww, Pancho, I'm so sorry to hear you'll be in the car for so many hours on Christmas. No wonder you're not looking forward to it! I think you're a lovely person to do it at all - I'm not sure I'm that nice. Anyway, you will be in my thoughts and I hope something special and wonderful happens to you this season because you definitely deserve it. Big Hug to you and the dogs!

Pancho, maybe you will get lucky and get the flu you better get it at least by tommorow.

 

[PieSusan]

Susan... I thought you were having a good day...what happened??

Someone that is supposed to be helping me is an incredibly impossible person to deal with and causes me great stress. I think that he is both a bit jealous of me and feels guilty because I do more for my mother than he does for his. He knows how upset I am and yet, every time he calls me, I wind up crying.

 

[PanchoHambre]

Pancho, maybe you will get lucky and get the flu you better get it at least by tommorow.

LOL... I do have a wicked cold.... anyway I am not such a nice person... I guilt tripped so the dogs are coming with me on xmas eve now... they will probably misbehave... oh well my brothers kid is a brat and he's invited

 

[Alix]

My very small and minor vent is that the home care aide who is supposed to give my Mom her meds seems to be more interested in her schedule than the times my Mom is supposed to get care. Mom ended up taking the wrong meds at the wrong time yesterday because she was left to her own devices. And she didn't get a meal prepped for her because instead of showing up after 430pm like she was supposed to, the aid was there before 330. A bit early for supper I think. Grrr.

Mom is fine, but I'm still a bit choked by all this mess. I'm settling down now. Thanks for letting me vent.

 

[PieSusan]

My very small and minor vent is that the home care aide who is supposed to give my Mom her meds seems to be more interested in her schedule than the times my Mom is supposed to get care. Mom ended up taking the wrong meds at the wrong time yesterday because she was left to her own devices. And she didn't get a meal prepped for her because instead of showing up after 430pm like she was supposed to, the aid was there before 330. A bit early for supper I think. Grrr.

Mom is fine, but I'm still a bit choked by all this mess. I'm settling down now. Thanks for letting me vent.

When my mom was home and I had some home healthcare workers for her, she would fire them constantly. One lied to me and said she took her to the doctors when the doctor called me and asked me why my mom never showed up. They mostly did nothing and sat around--they were suppose to do light housekeeping, feed her etc. I wound up still doing everything. So, eventually, I stopped using them.

So, I know exactly how you feel! Further, I thought things would get better once my mom went into a nursing home but she has recently informed me that a staff member has been mean to her, grabbed her and has hit her. I have her in what is suppose to be one of the nicest homes in Ohio. Grrrrrrrrr

 

[Alix]

Its frustrating isn't it? My Mom doesn't want to be a bother to anyone so she allows stuff she shouldn't. Then it leads to this kind of garbage. BAH! I get to go be the bad guy right before Christmas to the home care agency. *Sigh*

I'm really pretty fortunate, I have good people in place to help Mom with most of it so I don't need to be there all the time. I'm just still struggling to balance my life/work and hers. So far, all the balls are still in the air...lets hope I can keep them there.

 

[PieSusan]

Its frustrating isn't it? My Mom doesn't want to be a bother to anyone so she allows stuff she shouldn't. Then it leads to this kind of garbage. BAH! I get to go be the bad guy right before Christmas to the home care agency. *Sigh*

I'm really pretty fortunate, I have good people in place to help Mom with most of it so I don't need to be there all the time. I'm just still struggling to balance my life/work and hers. So far, all the balls are still in the air...lets hope I can keep them there.

I was forced to pay for a entire block of time even when I fired the aide who lied to me about the doctor's appointment. That really made me mad!

It is very hard to keep all the balls up in the air at the same time. Trying to be superwoman for a dozen years without taking good enough care of me made me very sick.

Be sure to take care of you, too! I didn't listen and I am paying for it now.

 

[Alix]

Thanks PieSusan, I am fortunate enough to have a husband who makes darned SURE I look after myself. If I start to slip he is very firm about reining me in. I appreciate your words of wisdom and support. Thanks! Sometimes one can feel very alone in this situation.

 

[kadesma]

Alix,
I'm sorry this has happened..seems people now days don't take things seriously it's collect the pay check and to hell with the rest..There is no feeling of care about the person they are taking care of...I was lucky and did it myself and with my dad hospice bless them helped me..With mom dementia came we kept her here it wasn't bad yet just the continual repeated questions..But one weekend mom was postive she had the flu, which to this day I swear she did..we took her to emergency and a week later my little coffee loving mom was gone..They fixed it so she gave up eating because they put this junk in it to make it like jelly, when they did it to her coffee it was all over, she would not eat,drink or even look us in the eye..that was the hardest week of my life and I still kick myself for not just taking her home when she asked me to...The flu like symptoms left the next day and they put her through so many doctors and tests it wore her little body out..I'll never forgive those doctors,nurses or that miserable hospital for this..Guess I've become a bitter old lady, cuz they nearly did the same to me. So Alix, be firm and let them know right from day one, this is my mom , do not overstep and do anything that will hurt her..If ya do you're gone!!! Wish I could come help you Alix, you can bet meds would be on time and so would her meals..You would smile and not have to worry
kades

 

[Alix]

Oh kadesma, what a horrible thing to happen! I know if it were up to you Mom would have the best care ever! You'd probably have a whale of a time together. She needs someone to perk her up a bit.

I guess part of this is my own frustration at not being able to be there to do all Mom needs done. Its good to hear that you at least had the opportunity and ability to be there for your Dad. I know how hard that must have been. You and your DH are special folk indeed. We need more of you around.

 

[Barbara L]

Christmas + Kidney Stones = Not much fun.

This round has been nagging at me off and on for a few weeks now. Not the worst pain I have ever had, but so aggravating. I just took another Hydrocodone and am off to take another hot bath. Maybe I can sleep for awhile (especially considering that I was not able to sleep at all last night--not from pain so much--just couldn't sleep).

Barbara

 

[texasgirl]

Awww Barbara. I hope the bath helps. I was hoping that I wouldn't see this thread today. I am sorry you are having pain today!! I hope the rest of your day is better!!

 

[PieSusan]

Christmas + Kidney Stones = Not much fun.

This round has been nagging at me off and on for a few weeks now. Not the worst pain I have ever had, but so aggravating. I just took another Hydrocodone and am off to take another hot bath. Maybe I can sleep for awhile (especially considering that I was not able to sleep at all last night--not from pain so much--just couldn't sleep).

Barbara

Ouch! That is not fun at all!!!! I hope you get some relief and enjoy the rest of Christmas.

 

[Barbara L]

Thanks. I'm feeling much better now. This has been very aggravating, since this has been going on for a few weeks. Fortunately the pain is never really severe, but it is bad enough. Actually, in some ways it is worse than short-term intense pain. It has been dragging on so long that I just feel worn out.

Enough complaining! I'm feeling better now, so I am going to take advantage of it and get some dishes washed. I get to talk with my family back in California in about an hour, so I am looking forward to that very much.

Barbara

 

[LPBeier]

Glad you are feeling better, Barbara but please take it easy. Don't go doing too much.

 

[Barbara L]

No danger of that happening! LOL Seriously though, I am not over-doing it, but I need to take advantage of any chance to get at least a little done. I really do appreciate everyone's concern.

Barbara

 

[kadesma]

No danger of that happening! LOL Seriously though, I am not over-doing it, but I need to take advantage of any chance to get at least a little done. I really do appreciate everyone's concern.

Barbara

Barbara,
Please take care, I pray you don't have any more problems and this clears up..It scares the ants out of me just thinking of what happened to me..Take it easy girl and get some help when you can.
cj

 

[Barbara L]

My problem is that with the depression, taking it easy is about all I do anymore. I went in to wash dishes a couple hours ago. All I got done was clearing the sink out and getting it ready. The "magnetic force" on the computer pulled me back in here and I have yet to wash a dish.

Barbara