Pet stories, let's start again

[PrincessFiona60]

Haha, can you imagine being in the dark and seeing glowing skulls and crossbones suddenly bouncing toward you accompanied by a miniature panting noise? The mischievous side of me thinks that would be a great prank.

To be licked to death by a creature with puppy breath who wants to sit on your shoulder.

 

[purple.alien.giraffe]

That is priceless

I love it and you are definitely trying to break my ribs.

Shhhh, calm deep breaths. No rib breaking. Just calm deep breaths. Calm deep breaths. In. Out. Better now? OK, laugh again!

I do this to my roommate. I'll get her laughing until she can't breath and is in pain and then I'll speak calmly in a soothing voice. We'll take deep breaths and she'll get all nice and calm. And just when she's about to loose the giddiness completely I'll tell her "OK, laugh again!" She always bursts back into giggle fits. She gets so mad at me because I usually do it to her when she's in a bad mood and wants to stay in a bad mood. It's great fun. Even more fun is when the cat decides to join in and starts batting at hers or my hair and just generally being cute and funny. I'm kind of surprised she's survived living with us.

 

[purple.alien.giraffe]

To be licked to death by a creature with puppy breath who wants to sit on your shoulder.

Heheheeeee. "It's eating me! It's eating me! Wait, it's just liking me. Bleh! Dog germs! Dog germs! Bleh!"

 

[PrincessFiona60]

To make Shrek laugh, all I have to do is mention, "Weekend at Bernie's," he can't even watch the movie or look at the box, anymore.

Thanks for the laughs, I'm copying that last so I can read it whenever I want.

 

[Claire]

ROFL! Ummm, yeah...the things our Dad's teach us. I tend to over explain and I have to start a story from the very beginning..."There was a big bang and the universe was created...and that's how the car got stuck in the front door of the bank."

We call this "I asked you what time it is, not how to make a watch." I laugh because a friend is really, really guilty of it. He'll start talking and notice everyone's eyes glazing over. He'll laugh and say, yeah, I know. I'm building a watch again!

 

[PrincessFiona60]

We call this "I asked you what time it is, not how to make a watch." I laugh because a friend is really, really guilty of it. He'll start talking and notice everyone's eyes glazing over. He'll laugh and say, yeah, I know. I'm building a watch again!

But, sometimes the brand of watch and the last time you changed the battery is integral to the answer...

 

[Claire]

.... not to mention I rarely wear my watch and when I put it on it could very well be in the wrong side of Daylight Savings Time, or for that matter, after a cross-country trip, in the wrong time zone entirely!

 

[PrincessFiona60]

.... not to mention I rarely wear my watch and when I put it on it could very well be in the wrong side of Daylight Savings Time, or for that matter, after a cross-country trip, in the wrong time zone entirely!

In the wrong quadrant of the galaxy, on the opposite side of the universe, which is ever expanding...because there was this Big bang...

 

[purple.alien.giraffe]

In the wrong quadrant of the galaxy, on the opposite side of the universe, which is ever expanding...because there was this Big bang...

Oh, but let me explain what I mean by big bang. Well, actually, first let me explain some things about the laws of physics and then we'll go back to the big bang so you know what I mean when I'm explaining it...

 

[PrincessFiona60]

Oh, but let me explain what I mean by big bang. Well, actually, first let me explain some things about the laws of physics and then we'll go back to the big bang so you know what I mean when I'm explaining it...

I think we could drive just about everyone bonkers.

 

[purple.alien.giraffe]

Both my parents, both my brothers and Sprout all over explain things too. Sprout is almost as non linear as I am. Dad and the two brothers give classroom quality lectures /eyeroll. Mom starts at the beginning and gives every detail right down to the hair on the leg of the fly that was on the horses tail... Just imagine those family dinners.

The worst though is trying to follow a conversation between multiple non-linear thinking ADD'ers. That poor guy in our study group that was normal. It wouldn't surprise me if he needed counsling for the trauma of that semester.

Speaking of trauma, and getting back on topic, you ever watch a cat pull a stack of laundry down on himself? Hehe. He flinches now at evey little sound whenever he walks by a pile of clothes.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

Nope, but Smudge fell asleep...literally. Right out of the front window, she had that, "I meant to that." look about her. She landed on her butt, there was no room for her to turn over in the short distance.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

Both my parents, both my brothers and Sprout all over explain things too. Sprout is almost as non linear as I am. Dad and the two brothers give classroom quality lectures /eyeroll. Mom starts at the beginning and gives every detail right down to the hair on the leg of the fly that was on the horses tail... Just imagine those family dinners.

The worst though is trying to follow a conversation between multiple non-linear thinking ADD'ers. That poor guy in our study group that was normal. It wouldn't surprise me if he needed counsling for the trauma of that semester.

Speaking of trauma, and getting back on topic, you ever watch a cat pull a stack of laundry down on himself? Hehe. He flinches now at evey little sound whenever he walks by a pile of clothes.

My kinda fun!

My brother...uber intelligent...was flunking most of his classes in high school, because he wouldn't do the work. He corrected my grammar one night and Shrek told him he was not allowed to correct me until he passed all his classes. The brat passed all his classes...

 

[Claire]

One of my favorite things with Rosebud is that she just loves .... ice cubes. I swear, she'd rather have an ice cube than food. With my other dogs, I had heat issues, couldn't get them to cool off. Wouldn't drink from a hose or gutter or stream. This gal, if you toss an ice cube in the bowl of water, she will play with it until she gets it out of the bowl, and then crunch on it when it is soft. I like it because I know cooling her paws is a good thing. THEN she'll chase it all around the house until it melts. It has been funny to watch.

 

[purple.alien.giraffe]

How is it that my cat is a fraction of my size but still manages to comandeer the greater portion of the bed?

 

[DaveSoMD]

During the night cats and dogs expand to fill the available space, but ONLY at night.. .. didn't you know that?

 

[purple.alien.giraffe]

My cat must be special then because I sleep during the day and the hubby sleeps at night and he does it to both of us.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

My cat must be special then because I sleep during the day and the hubby sleeps at night and he does it to both of us.

You need two of them...

I want to know why hairballs are only yacked at night...

 

[purple.alien.giraffe]

You need two of them...

I want to know why hairballs are only yacked at night...

And why always on the carpet not three inches from the hardwood floor where it would have been easier to clean.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

And why always on the carpet not three inches from the hardwood floor where it would have been easier to clean.

Do you know how far I can launch a cat, that's at the end of the bed, about to spew on my bedspread? From a sound sleep?