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Old 06-22-2008, 06:20 AM   #51
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Originally Posted by Barbara L View Post
I just found this site, MyStateWill.com : Intestacy Calculators show what happens without a will, which has a calculator to see what the spouse and kids will get if you die without a will. I tried a few different states with our information (living spouse, two kids). I checked about 10. Most were about the same, showing the spouse getting half of what the estate is worth and the two kids each getting a fourth. California split it evenly between the spouse and two kids. Interesting. Of course, this doesn't get into the taxes, etc. The site does mention specific laws pertaining to each state.

Barbara
That's an interesting site.

California and Texas are both community property states.

An example, if you die without a will in Texas the spouse will get one half interest in the house, and the children will receive the other half. Sometimes this is fine. If the surviving spouse needs to sell, he/she will only receive half its value, the children the other half. (This is a simple version).

I hope this information encourages others to have a will in place.

Thanks for posting it.
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Old 06-22-2008, 11:41 AM   #52
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We have wills and trusts all set up and ready to go. One word of advice..you may want to think about a new will once in awhile as your family grows and you have more to leave them.

As for what to do with our bodies.. cremate us quickly. I don't want any kind of service or party or anything. Just take my ashes to a beautiful beach and let them go. Paul wants his scattered off one of the huge rocks in Greece.
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Old 06-22-2008, 02:20 PM   #53
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It's interesting that people who have posted tend to want cremation and no service. While I have no problem with cremation, I do have a problem with the no service. I will not dictate to my family what to do. It must be something meaningful to them since I will technically not be there! If they want a full blown funeral with viewing etc, fine. If they want something private, fine. Whatever they need to do. Funerals do have a function. We have ceremonies and gatherings for so many of life's milestones. This is just one more. It may seem like a burden to the family to plan and deal with the many details, in some ways, it is helpful to have things you MUST do to keep you going. So my instructions to my family are "Do whatever you want."
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Old 06-22-2008, 02:28 PM   #54
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I'm going to be cremated and dumped in the ocean. If my survivors absolutely insist on leaving a memorial, they've been instructed to build a gazebo or bench on the beach for everyone to use and enjoy...if they insist they have been autorized to put up a small brass plate with my name and dates and such on the bench. No point in clogging up the earth with my remains...
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Old 06-22-2008, 03:02 PM   #55
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Cremation and work my ashes into a garden.
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Old 06-22-2008, 04:32 PM   #56
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Cremation and work my ashes into a garden.
cremation and urn buried next to my husband. we own plots.babe
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Old 06-22-2008, 04:59 PM   #57
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It's interesting that people who have posted tend to want cremation and no service. While I have no problem with cremation, I do have a problem with the no service. I will not dictate to my family what to do. It must be something meaningful to them since I will technically not be there! If they want a full blown funeral with viewing etc, fine. If they want something private, fine. Whatever they need to do. Funerals do have a function. We have ceremonies and gatherings for so many of life's milestones. This is just one more. It may seem like a burden to the family to plan and deal with the many details, in some ways, it is helpful to have things you MUST do to keep you going. So my instructions to my family are "Do whatever you want."
I agree completely. I know that when my mom died, the memorial service and funeral were very important to those of us still living. It was a chance to share some of our memories of my mom with friends and family. I couldn't care less if they throw me in a cardboard box when I'm gone! James would like to be cremated, so I will either be cremated or buried, and his remains buried with me (or me buried with his remains, depending on who goes first). I'm also not one to leave an urn of ashes on the mantel to remember him by. The memorial service and funeral are for the living, so that they can feel closure. When my favorite aunt died, in Minnesota, she was cremated and the majority of her ashes were buried there. Most of us were not able to go for that. In the spring everyone flew to California. We had a small (just family) memorial service at the cemetary where my mom, her brother, and their parents were buried. During that ceremony my aunt's three (grown) children sprinkled ashes on her parents', sister's, and brother's graves.

Barbara
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Old 06-22-2008, 05:02 PM   #58
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New here on DC, and with the recent sad turn of events, it makes one consider one's mortality, even at forty... While I believe carrying out a loved one's last requests a sign of respect, it's true, too, that a service is for the living - their way of remembering and mourning their dead. 'm not sure about a service, wanting one or not - I feel almost embarrassed to think of wanting one, like it's a vanity thing.

The only thing I know for sure that I want, is to be cremated and shot up in a firecracker. Not sure if that's even possible - I better check that out!
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Old 06-22-2008, 05:33 PM   #59
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Having parents and a grandmother that had protracted, long illnesses before they died, I've tried to do things differently. I was a single mother of three left with their burial/cremation expenses and no real idea if I was doing what they wanted. I did the usual stuff, plus researched and purchased long term health care insurance for my husband (I remarried a long time ago) and myself so that our children won't have to throw their own finances into a disaster to take care of either one of us, nor will we have to "spend down" and become paupers to get the care we may need. It's expensive, but I do sleep better at night. I figure if I have the insurance, I won't need it and I'm okay with that.
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Old 06-22-2008, 07:06 PM   #60
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This is simple - go to a good attorney where you live and him/her draw up a will to the specific instructions of both of you. It's not scarry and not expensive if you look around.
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