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Old 07-08-2009, 11:06 AM   #11
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I had to dig through my misc. pile of papers, but I found some more. I write these things down and throw them in a tray.

Quote by Chris Rock during the Bush administration:
You know the world has gone crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named, "Bush, Dick and Colon."
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I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.
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And by the late, but great Erma Bombeck...

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
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Never lend your car to anyone you have given birth to.
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Never participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill.
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Finally things have started clicking for me, my knees, my elbows, my back, etc...
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Old 07-08-2009, 11:17 AM   #12
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Albert Einstein explaining Relativity:

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.
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Old 07-08-2009, 02:30 PM   #13
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I don't have a favorite quote but here's a recent Charles Schwab billboard ad which was plastered around L.A. which I thought was amusing.

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Old 07-08-2009, 03:00 PM   #14
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Voltaire's letter to a critic:

I am seated in the smallest room in the house.
I have your letter before me.
Soon it will be behind me.
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Old 07-08-2009, 03:29 PM   #15
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quote

"It's always somthing, aint never nothing"
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Old 07-08-2009, 04:36 PM   #16
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I guess I like my sig line best, but if I come up with something else I'll let ya know by changing my sig line, lol!!
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Old 07-08-2009, 05:37 PM   #17
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These arrived in my in-box this afternoon:

Exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, “If you were my husband I'd give you poison,” and he said, “If you were my wife, I'd drink it.”

A Member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.” “That depends, sir,” said Disraeli, “on whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

“He had delusions of adequacy.” Walter Kerr

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” Winston Churchill

“A modest little person, with much to be modest about.” Winston Churchill

“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” Clarence Darrow

“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

“Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?” Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)

“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book. I'll waste no time reading it.” Moses Hadas

“He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.” Abraham Lincoln

“I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” Mark Twain

“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.” Oscar Wilde

“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play. Bring a friend... if you have one.” George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one.” Winston Churchill, in response

“I feel so miserable without you. It's almost like having you here.” Stephen Bishop

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” John Bright

“I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.” Irvin S. Cobb

“He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others.” Samuel Johnson

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” Paul Keating

“There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure.” Jack E. Leonard

“He has the attention span of a lightning bolt.” Robert Redford

“They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.” Thomas Brackett Reed

“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.” Charles M. de Talleyrand

“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” Forrest Tucker

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?” Mark Twain

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” Mae West

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” Oscar Wilde

“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination.” Andrew Lang

“He has Van Gogh's ear for music.” Billy Wilder

“I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But, this wasn't it.” Groucho Marx

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Old 07-08-2009, 06:36 PM   #18
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Quote

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
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Old 07-09-2009, 12:50 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chile Chef View Post
Isn't Bengali one of the Thunder cat's from the 1980's cartoon?
No Bengali is the language spoken in Bengal. World's 7th largest spoken language. Bengali is very rich in literature, culture and heritage and also a very sweet language.I am Bengali.
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Old 07-09-2009, 11:07 AM   #20
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I am a nobody.
Nobody is perfect.
Therefore, I must be perfect!
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You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see, but you can't close your heart to the things you do not want to feel.
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