Salt Made from Human Tears

[no mayonnaise]

Salt Made From Tears combines centuries-old craft with the freshest human tears which are gently boiled, released into shallow crystallisation tanks, then harvested by hand and finally rinsed in brine. Experience the full range of these flavours in this exclusive collection.

~ Salt Made From Tears of Anger
~ Salt Made From Tears Shed While Chopping Onions
~ Salt Made From Tears Shed While Sneezing
~ Salt Made From Tears of Laughter
~ Salt Made From Tears of Sorrow


Link

 

[Chief Longwind Of The North]

Though I know that salt is a mineral, and that when concentrated through evaporation of a brine, and heated to destroy whatever lurking organizms are roaming around that aren't already destroyed by the crystalline salt, it's still just weird enough to make me say, no thanks.

I know that from a chemical, or geological standpoint, salt is salt, is salt. But I'll still pass on salt derived from human tears. It's a bit too much like meat from a human thigh for me.

Seeeeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North

 

[sparrowgrass]

Unfortunately, they are out of stock according to the website:

We’re terribly sorry but the humans of Hoxton have been a little too full of joy and the tears have run dry. Regrettably it's taking a little longer than usual to fulfil your orders.

 

[sparrowgrass]

They also don't ship to the US.

 

[Andy M.]

They also don't ship to the US.

That's so sad

That's terrible

That's awful

Here, cry into this jar...

 

[Zhizara]

Rampant cases of pink eye YIKES!

 

[sparrowgrass]

Check out the link--those are supplies for gourmet MONSTERS! Talk to the ones who live under your bed--they are probably already ordering from this site.

(Also, LOL at Andy!!)

 

[buckytom]

my god, this is disgusting! salt is so plentiful around the earth, why would someone want to get it from a glandular reaction of other people? i mean, it can't taste any better than more pure forms right from the earth or sea. in fact, it probably requires more processing to make it safe and edible. with the exception of wiccans and cannibals, who'd buy this stuff?

just gross.


btw, we were going to have leg of youper tonight for dinner, but i hear it's already too "hammy" and stringy...

 

[GLC]

I prefer vintage tear salt. Like SPICY TEAR GAS FLAVOR - HOUSTON - 1968. I understand there are some good Paris versions, too.

In prehistoric times, such things had not been invented, and they had to induce tears by applying crude methods, like dropping rocks on feet.

And I suppose that if you have a problem with salt intake, you can use substitutes.

 

[kadesma]

While I find this disgusting and off putiing, each person has his own type of thing.Please try to remember others feelings when you post!!
kadesma

 

[buckytom]

i guess the next thing is that ore-ida is going to start selling the potatoes that grow in my ears that my mom warned me about.

 

[Dawgluver]

If you go into Customer Services, there's an explanation of products and the ingredients in them. The tears are sea salt with added herbs and spices!

 

[buckytom]

i don't wanna know what body part they get "herbs and spices" from.

 

[Sir_Loin_of_Beef]

P. T. Barnum sure got it right.

 

[Greg Who Cooks]

Come on. The site has to be a hoax.

AFAIK human tears are a body product, and medically speaking they are biohazard waste. Even if the site isn't a hoax, that's probably why they can't ship to US.

 

[Dawgluver]

It's not a hoax, they sell things like old fashioned candies, like humbugs, and flavored sea salt. They are just very creative in their labels.

 

[Greg Who Cooks]

Okay so it's not really from human tears then, right?

It's still kind of disgusting even if they're just creative names for otherwise ordinary salts. There's a real "yuck" factor there for me.

 

[forty_caliber]

There's a tear in my beer..... oh brother.

.40

 

[PrincessFiona60]

From the site:

We deliver to UK destinations only, via 1st class Royal Mail. We are looking into the possibility of shipping internationally, and will update this page as new destinations become available. Postage and packing is £4 for orders of up to £20, £7 for orders £20-£60, £9 for orders £60 - £75 and free for any order over £75. This charge helps cover our costs, making sure that the best proceeds from your purchase go towards supporting writing workshops for young people at the Ministry of Stories.
Our team of zombie volunteers sends orders once a week on a Saturday by 1st class Royal Mail, who aim to deliver within 1 working day. On average, you can expect your delivery within 12 working days of order confirmation, and hopefully sooner. Unless something truly hideous happens, in which case delays of several centuries are not unlikely.
If you live outside of the UK and would like to indulge in our high quality goods for monsters, you can find a selection of our products for sale on Firebox.com: Human Preserves, Cubed Earwax and Zombie Mints.

 

[tinlizzie]

Just the thing to sprinkle on your Crunchy Spring Frog candies.