The Emperor's New Clothes

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VeraBlue

Executive Chef
Joined
Jul 10, 2006
Messages
3,683
Location
northern NJ
We've all heard the tale...with the moral that it doesn't pay to kiss butt, royal or otherwise. In the end, it simply shows you that .....nude is good.!!:ROFLMAO:

Keeping in mind that this is a Disney-esque forum, :ermm:....what is the strangest, (or not, depending on the company, I suppose) thing you've done while doing your best Emperor impersonation?

I'll start, if for no other reason than I was an Emperor just 10 minutes ago:king:! I returned from work, still in my whites, knowing I needed to pass the vacuum in the living room. The house smells lovely...a pot of cinnamon water simmering in the kitchen, scented candles upstairs, freshly laundered linens in the budoir...and then there is me and my kitchen-y whites!:mrgreen: It simply would not do, and then it dawned on me (yea, like it's the first time I did what I'm about to tell you......NOT!:ohmy::-p) Off come the whites, tossed into the hamper, and back down the stairs to vacuum. Did I mention that my son is visiting his grandparents in Florida for the weekend?? Ah, what a relief. The work is done, I only briefly disrespected the living room, and now, safely ensconsed in my bathrobe, I'm off to the shower.

I know I'm not the only royalty in the room......Do tell. It's Friday, after all, what have you got to loose??
 
Why did you put on your bathrobe to go take a shower?

I think that everyone will agree that the minute one even so much as takes off their shoes and sits down, the phone rings, the door bell sounds, a utility truck pulls up, and a FedEx package arrives. Your mom is calling on the phone, a kid is at the door selling candy bars, the utility people are upgrading something and will be turning something off for an hour, and FedEx is delivering a replacement that you have been waiting on for months.
 
This is not one that happened to me, but it made me think of this story.

My fathers mother was apparently a very unique and interesting woman. Unfortunately she passed away before I was born so I never did get to know her. I have heard many stories though and this one is one of my favorites.

It was a very hot summer day in Brooklyn NY in the 1950's. My grandmother was doing her ironing downstairs in the basement. My young aunt was by her side. Since it was so hot grandma decided do iron sans clothes to try to stay cool. Well of course the doorbell rings and she starts to go upstairs to answer the door. My aunt stopped her and said mom what are you doing? Aren't you going to put anything on? Oops silly me. Of course I should put something on. So she puts on a pair of boots and opens the door :LOL:
 
When I was growing up, a lot of people still had their eletric meters in the house...nobody locked their doors back then, and the meter reader would walk right in the door and straight to the meter.
Ours was in the basement. My mother was down there one day, doing the laundry, and decided to take off her housecoat and throw it in the washer.
She got caught by the meter reader...LOL!

Vera, my husband and I are big fans of naked...it's been great, since the boy left home. :-p
 
Oh my. I'm giggling here at my keyboard. Thanks for the chuckles.

If I lived somewhere warm I'm sure I would find a nudist colony to live in. Clothes are a pita in my opinion.

My most memorable experience was when I was about 20 and lived in a high rise apartment in downtown Calgary. I lived across from the Suncor building. One hot summer day I came home from work and stripped off all my sticky office clothes, took a shower and didn't bother to get dressed. I puttered about having some dinner, and then decided to vacuum. I cranked my stereo and started rocking out while I vacuumed. As I went, I got that feeling...you know...the one where someone is watching you? I looked up through my balcony doors, across the street into the Suncor building. A lovely gentleman gave me smile and little finger wave from across the street. Oops.
 
We had some very dear friends who lived beside us at our first house. They had a key to come in & feed our cats when we would go on vacation. Well, I had just gotten out of the shower & decided to put the icing on hubby's b-day cake before getting dressed. Well, I had forgotten a few very important things: #1 My car was in the shop so it looked like no one was home, #2 hubby's b-day present was at our friends house, #3 I had asked our friend to bring it over sometime that day, #4 I told him that if no one was home to just bring it in & put it in the kitchen. I was standing at the kitchen counter totally engrossed in getting the icing perfect & my back door swings open, standing there is our friend with a guy he works with!! I just smiled sweetly & said that they needed to pick their mouths up off the floor, that they were acting like they had never seen a naked woman before. They started apologizing at the same time for not knocking. I assured them that no harm had been done, they didn't even know I was home. I left the kitchen, got dressed, & helped them lug hubby's present inside (it was one of those big tool boxes that go in the bed of a truck). Hubby got a good laugh out of it when he got home from work. Our friend met him in the driveway & started apologizing as soon as he got out of his truck.:LOL:
 
I once participated in the worlds largest (at the time) nude photo. There were 1200 of us. I figured the anonymity of it would make it much easier to do than if there were only a few people. I was right about that. Well that is until a few years later I was at work and a guy I work with called me on the phone and told me to sit down. He said he was watching HBO and they were doing a show on a photographer who does nudes. all of a sudden he sees ME in all my glory. And it wasn't just once or twice, but 4 times the camera zooms in right on me. From that day on I was known as "nude boy" and my wife was known as "Mrs. nude boy".

The cool thing is that for everyone who participated, the photographer mailed a large copy of the print. I have it framed and it looks great. I just wish I could have seen the actual shot when it was in the gallery.
 
After reading Miss VeraBlue's post I have finally, after 18 hours, composed myself to the point where I think I can relate a true story.

During my sophmore year of college I was dating a beautiful young lady. At this point we had not consumated the relationship. One fine day she was to bring a text book that we were sharing by my house. She arrived at the appointed hour only to find me in my bedroom asleep,:sleep: Totally/completely naked, except for a baseball cap and sunglasses:cool: When I awoke, to my complete shock and surprise the text book lay at the foot of my bed.:ohmy: She had departed the premisies without waking me. The next day after class we went to our favorite bench. This being the first time we had had a chance to discuss this "nude encounter" I was prepared to offer her my deepest apologies...before I could speak..she offered a proposal of marriage to which I happily accepted.:LOL:
 
StirBlue said:
Why did you put on your bathrobe to go take a shower?

I think that everyone will agree that the minute one even so much as takes off their shoes and sits down, the phone rings, the door bell sounds, a utility truck pulls up, and a FedEx package arrives. Your mom is calling on the phone, a kid is at the door selling candy bars, the utility people are upgrading something and will be turning something off for an hour, and FedEx is delivering a replacement that you have been waiting on for months.

I hate to walk back to the bedroom "moist"...hahahaha.
 
Constance said:
When I was growing up, a lot of people still had their eletric meters in the house...nobody locked their doors back then, and the meter reader would walk right in the door and straight to the meter.
Ours was in the basement. My mother was down there one day, doing the laundry, and decided to take off her housecoat and throw it in the washer.
She got caught by the meter reader...LOL!

Vera, my husband and I are big fans of naked...it's been great, since the boy left home. :-p


Isn't it wonderful?!!!!
 
Alix said:
Oh my. I'm giggling here at my keyboard. Thanks for the chuckles.

If I lived somewhere warm I'm sure I would find a nudist colony to live in. Clothes are a pita in my opinion.

My most memorable experience was when I was about 20 and lived in a high rise apartment in downtown Calgary. I lived across from the Suncor building. One hot summer day I came home from work and stripped off all my sticky office clothes, took a shower and didn't bother to get dressed. I puttered about having some dinner, and then decided to vacuum. I cranked my stereo and started rocking out while I vacuumed. As I went, I got that feeling...you know...the one where someone is watching you? I looked up through my balcony doors, across the street into the Suncor building. A lovely gentleman gave me smile and little finger wave from across the street. Oops.

It was the vacuum's fault. It's always the vacuum....
 
Uncle Bob said:
After reading Miss VeraBlue's post I have finally, after 18 hours, composed myself to the point where I think I can relate a true story.

During my sophmore year of college I was dating a beautiful young lady. At this point we had not consumated the relationship. One fine day she was to bring a text book that we were sharing by my house. She arrived at the appointed hour only to find me in my bedroom asleep,:sleep: Totally/completely naked, except for a baseball cap and sunglasses:cool: When I awoke, to my complete shock and surprise the text book lay at the foot of my bed.:ohmy: She had departed the premisies without waking me. The next day after class we went to our favorite bench. This being the first time we had had a chance to discuss this "nude encounter" I was prepared to offer her my deepest apologies...before I could speak..she offered a proposal of marriage to which I happily accepted.:LOL:


Those must have been some sunglasses:cool:, my dear!
 
When I was 10 or 11 my family moved to the country, but, next door to this property was a good sized mound with Austrailian Pines trees dividing our property and the 10 acres next door, unknown to my folks, it was a nudist colony. One day I was cooling my horse out and walking down my driveway and I looked to my right and OH MY :eek: there were about 15 naked older men! One was working on his car (it was August, the sun was shining and the car had lots of chrome) and I thought to myself wow that guy sure is brave, one wrong wiggle and OUCH.:blink: As I have gotten older, and being I live in the country still, I have learned to enjoy a few emporer moments. (I just don't work on my car) :blush:
 
Renee Attili said:
As I have gotten older, and being I live in the country still, I have learned to enjoy a few emporer moments. (I just don't work on my car) :blush:

I'm about to move into the back of beyond and am really looking forward to being able to wander around with no clothes on. It's been impossible over the last few years (we live in a ground floor flat with lots of windows - more window than wall in fact!). Even the bathroom is pretty exposed - as I noticed when I spotted next door's gardener clipping back a plant more than strictly required because he wasn't paying attention to what he was doing...
 
Oh yikes, I realy am royalty then. I am a big fan of the Emporer look! Inside housework in my house almost always gets done in underwear at the most because I nip about and almost work out and it is much easier to do it like that. I got caught out when I was a teenager. Our isolation stables were at the end of our garden and some distance from the rest of our stables, and a horse arrived with ringworm and needed box rest, so a sacrifical pony and the mare were put in these two, infrequently used stables. I sleep in the altogether but put pjs or tracksuits on for yard work in the morning, and other outside housework!, mainly because they wash and dry very quickly so I can use a set aday, then shower and get into my proper clothes, but I muck out really really quickly, and like with my bhousework, work up a sweat, so I often wear my pj bottoms and my under clothes on top (the pj top comes off when I get hot). I did not realise how overlooked those two stables where, being used to the realtive privacy of the rest of the yard. My mother heard an arguement between the next door neighbour when she found him very interested in my morning routine! My mother bought me lots of crop tops after that LOL.

I was brought up very comfortable with my own skin, as my parents made an effort to get past barriers they felt they had there....it worked too well!
 
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