The Thankfulness Club

[Cooking Goddess]

Today I am grateful that my mother has overcome a significant hurdle/imminent crisis. We were told that she may not make it past this weekend....that may well still be the case but she has perked up a lot and that is a blessing.

Enjoy these moments to cherish when she is no longer with you. I'll keep you in my prayers this Holy weekend.

 

[Cooking Goddess]

After a year of living in two cities due to jobs, my husband has returned home! No more weekend hubby. We are back together! He starts a new job April 20th.

Yay! So glad to hear things are back to a normal routine. Does this mean that he has changed employers too? Or just a different job location with his old one? And you ended up never having to change your job at all, right? Anyway, congrats. You survived!

You have to be a special kind of woman to be the wife of a man who is away from home more than he is with you. It takes a lot of patience and love. Glad to hear the two of are back together again. Good luck to your new found joy!

In some cases (my best friend back home, for one), the wife credits her husband's travel and being away from home for keeping their marriage together! Himself was never gone for more than a full week, but don't think we both didn't enjoy some of those breaks from each other. In fact, there are days even now when I ask if he doesn't have somewhere to go for a day or four.

 

[creative]

Today I am grateful for the kind words someone said to me in the hospital ward my mum is in. I had a distressing day (something went wrong with an important order...I cry easily these days being at a low ebb) so I really welcomed what transpired.

She was another patient on the same ward as my mother. She beckoned me to her as I was leaving and said she was touched by how I interacted with my mother....said she could see the love there and conveyed that my mum appreciated me and other words that consoled me. It was almost as if she was there to bring me some comfort...she appeared somewhat angelic to me. It was an unexpected but poignant encounter.

 

[Dawgluver]

Jabbur, some excellent news! Enjoy your hubby!

Creative, so glad the lady's words were of comfort to you. You are a good and caring daughter!

 

[Addie]

Yay! So glad to hear things are back to a normal routine. Does this mean that he has changed employers too? Or just a different job location with his old one? And you ended up never having to change your job at all, right? Anyway, congrats. You survived!

In some cases (my best friend back home, for one), the wife credits her husband's travel and being away from home for keeping their marriage together! Himself was never gone for more than a full week, but don't think we both didn't enjoy some of those breaks from each other. In fact, there are days even now when I ask if he doesn't have somewhere to go for a day or four.

My second husband was a commercial fisherman. For each trip he was gone for 15-30 days at a time. Then he would be home for 48 hours. Back to sea. You get used to it. For a while my first husband wanted to go back to sea. So I finally said, "Sure." He made one trip. Was on an oil tanker for three months. A little bit too long for me. He decided he no longer enjoyed being at sea and decided to stay ashore for good. He really missed us and the crazy hubbub in the house. And I was glad.

 

[Addie]

Today I am grateful for the kind words someone said to me in the hospital ward my mum is in. I had a distressing day (something went wrong with an important order...I cry easily these days being at a low ebb) so I really welcomed what transpired.

She was another patient on the same ward as my mother. She beckoned me to her as I was leaving and said she was touched by how I interacted with my mother....said she could see the love there and conveyed that my mum appreciated me and other words that consoled me. It was almost as if she was there to bring me some comfort...she appeared somewhat angelic to me. It was an unexpected but poignant encounter.

And she was so right. I think she saw how you needed some kind words at that moment. Prayers are sent her way.

 

[Addie]

Someone asked me this past week if I believed in God. I thought that was an odd question. Doesn't everyone? At least everyone I know does. That set me to thinking after I answered "Yes."

How many times have I turned to God during my darkest times. It is the very first place I go. And when I hear of anyone in distress or being in one of their dark hours, I always send a prayer up to God for them.

I don't always share my faith with others. I am rather quiet about it. I am not one to thump the Bible. But I am grateful for my faith. It has gotten me through some very tough times. Like the time the USCG showed up at my door at three in the morning to notify me that the boat my husband was on had gone down, but the crew had been picked up swimming in the Atlantic and were at the Marine Hospital. I dang near fainted before that poor sailor finished what he was saying. But when I lost a child, I don't think there is any despair deeper in this world. I got though the worst of it only because God saw to it that I stayed in the state of shock for a couple of weeks. And now I have two children that will never be out of the woods again. I live in fear of getting "that" phone call.

 

[Gravy Queen]

Addie if it brings you comfort then that's wonderful . But the answer is No , not everyone believe in God and everyone I know doesn't . It's our choices ,and like every faith we should respect a choice to either believe in a god or not to believe .


However I think , like politics , religion probably has a place on a different forum.

 

[creative]

Someone asked me this past week if I believed in God. I thought that was an odd question. Doesn't everyone? At least everyone I know does. That set me to thinking after I answered "Yes."

How many times have I turned to God during my darkest times. It is the very first place I go. And when I hear of anyone in distress or being in one of their dark hours, I always send a prayer up to God for them.

I don't always share my faith with others. I am rather quiet about it. I am not one to thump the Bible. But I am grateful for my faith. It has gotten me through some very tough times. Like the time the USCG showed up at my door at three in the morning to notify me that the boat my husband was on had gone down, but the crew had been picked up swimming in the Atlantic and were at the Marine Hospital. I dang near fainted before that poor sailor finished what he was saying. But when I lost a child, I don't think there is any despair deeper in this world. I got though the worst of it only because God saw to it that I stayed in the state of shock for a couple of weeks. And now I have two children that will never be out of the woods again. I live in fear of getting "that" phone call.

Whilst I see that having a faith, e.g. belief in God can prove a source of solace and comfort, I have also seen it become the reverse. For example, there are those who did believe in God up until something terrible happened to them - perhaps losing a partner - and they questioned their faith and lost it.

Also, not everyone believes in God....as I am sure you know, hence why there are atheists.

Although I am spiritually focused, I am also a realist. I do not want to be deluded. I have tapped into the divine source of love, also felt a tall 'being' on my right hand side at a time of great distress and had a mystical experience - shown to me - that we are all interconnected....like a fine mesh but a personal God (created in our own image) seems not to ring true. However, whatever brings out the good in others is fine by me.

 

[Addie]

Addie if it brings you comfort then that's wonderful . But the answer is No , not everyone believe in God and everyone I know doesn't . It's our choices ,and like every faith we should respect a choice to either believe in a god or not to believe .


However I think , like politics , religion probably has a place on a different forum.

I know, religion and politics are not for this forum. But this is a "thankfulness" site, and I stated what I am thankful for. I didn't ask for a discussion on the subject. And I don't think I violated any of the rules of this forum. If I did, I am sure the moderators will remove it and notify me. I will understand if they do.

My daughter's birthday and anniversary of her death is coming up and it got me to thinking. So I created my post. Right now is a rough time for me every year.

I apologize to you and the other members if I have offended anyone here.

 

[Gravy Queen]

No apologies needed and I am not offended , just expressed my opinion .

I didn't know your personal circumstances Addie but I am truly very sorry that this is a difficult time for you . X




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[Addie]

No apologies needed and I am not offended , just expressed my opinion .

I didn't know your personal circumstances Addie but I am truly very sorry that this is a difficult time for you . X

Sent from my iPhone using Discuss Cooking

Yesterday I made the mistake of watching a movie with Susan Hayward and William Lunden called "On Top Of The Mountain". I had seen it many years ago. About 20 years or so. I had forgotten most of it and the fact that there are two scenes where parents lose a child. One from drowning and the other through a miscarriage. If I had remembered those scenes, I would never have even given one second to thinking of watching it. I haven't broken down like that since the day I had to identify her body. Fortunately I was alone here and could really let go. I am talking deep wrenching hard sobs. So hopefully, I have it all out of my system now and can move forward. I don't know why it has been so hard this year. Some years the two events go by and I don't even remember to think about it. I can even sit here and write about it and not even get upset. So maybe I needed yesterday. And for that I am thankful.

 

[creative]

Addie...I am pleased to read (in the post above this one) that you had the opportunity to release much pent up grief. Hopefully this has provided closure for you.

 

[Addie]

Addie...I am pleased to read (in the post above this one) that you had the opportunity to release much pent up grief. Hopefully this has provided closure for you.

Thank you. I am feeling so much better. All these years and I didn't even realize it was what I really needed. I am the only surviving member of my generation in my family. No aunts, cousins, etc. Only the next generation. So I have always tried to put on a strong front. I am the one who makes all the hard decisions, calms someone down when they are upset, etc. "Ask Addie. She will know what to do." And I do.

So finally after losing both parents, a child, and my sister in the past 50 years, I gave in and broke down completely. It was my turn. I doubt if anyone had been with me, it wouldn't have helped. I didn't need comfort. I needed to give in and not worry about helping some other person. I needed to help myself and I did. I had such a calm when I finally stopped sobbing. I was able to remember all the happy thoughts about her.

Thank you for caring. I do feel so much better now. All these years I have been living with pain. And now it is gone.

 

[Gravy Queen]

Oh Addie . :-( well now I apologise , I had no idea . Sounds like you did need a release , sometimes we try so hard to be brave and help others that we can forget about ourselves . Then something triggers those feelings , like a film , plus anniversaries are so difficult, and it comes out , whoosh . I suppose it's probably better that those feelings do come out , rather than holding things in for whatever reason . Take care x

 

[Addie]

Oh Addie . :-( well now I apologise , I had no idea . Sounds like you did need a release , sometimes we try so hard to be brave and help others that we can forget about ourselves . Then something triggers those feelings , like a film , plus anniversaries are so difficult, and it comes out , whoosh . I suppose it's probably better that those feelings do come out , rather than holding things in for whatever reason . Take care x

Thank GQ. And that is exactly what I have been doing all these years. I almost can't believe how good I feel today. Now I can celebrate days regarding my daughter. I can share all the good memories I have of her. And I can finally be grateful for the time I did have with her on this earth. Instead of being angry that five children were orphaned, I can be grateful that she gave me five beautiful grandchildren. And I had the opportunity to finish raising one of them.

Thank you for caring.

 

[creative]

Addie...that was a lot to endure and for so long. It really feels that you have healed from this long suppressed situation and that this now must be freeing you up and giving you a new lease of life. Wonderful!

 

[Souschef]

A movie did it to me too

My late wife was brain injured in 1993. Even though she recovered physically for the most part, I was still her caregiver for 12 years.
We were able to travel a bit, and while on a plane I watched "50 First Dates' with Drew Barrymore and Adam Sandler. It was about a girl who was brain injured and would forget the previous day.
I think I went through 3 Kleenex and 2 cocktail napkins watching it.

 

[Cheryl J]

Aww...SousChef...

I love that movie...every time I hear "Wouldn't It Be Nice" by the Beach Boys I think of that movie. Can kind of relate to that with my late mom.

 

[Cooking Goddess]

Himself

I'm so thankful that my wonderful Himself really pitched in with helping me set up for the garage sale. He hates that kind of stuff, yet he was right beside me dragging stuff from the basement and sitting in the garage with me while waiting for "customers".

Now if I can just get him to start patching and painting around the house before he forgets how to do handyman work. I think I'll let him recover from this week before I ask...