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Old 07-12-2012, 08:05 PM   #2601
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I too have a state issued ID. I don't drive. I once went into a bank to cash a check. The teller said that it was not a real ID. She confiscated it. Created her own melee. I asked for the bank manager. I was so angry at her stupidity. I know it wasn't my picture on it. It is one of the best pics I have ever taken. I usually take care of problems in a very soft but firm voice. Not this time. I made sure everyone in the bank heard me. All of a sudden the line behind me melted and the people went to stand in other lines. She left her window crying. I got my check cashed and my ID back.
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Old 07-12-2012, 08:10 PM   #2602
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I am very upset at a certain person, who shall remain nameless (but is my sister). Pretty much anything my sister has ever done has been to benefit herself. I am absolutely not exaggerating when I say that over 50% of what comes out of her mouth is a lie (probably closer to 75%, but I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt). She isn't stupid (huge reader, great at all types of puzzles, etc.), but years of meth and cocaine use, as well as hard liquor and who knows what else haven't helped any. I only tell you this to show you a little about what we have had to deal with. She can be very nice, and very generous, but you have to constantly guard against getting stabbed in the back.

Anyway, as most of you know, my dad died in November and we had his funeral in December. Since he had bought two plots (one with my mom, in CA, and one in his family plot, in MO) we had his ashes divided, with the plan to go back to Missouri in May or June, have a little family reunion, and bury the remaining ashes. Unfortunately, finances haven't allowed us to do it yet.

My vent is that my sister suddenly decided that she is going to take his ashes back to Missouri herself, and she didn't ask any of us how we felt about it, or even let any of us know her plans until she had to. She had to tell her son because she wants him to go with her so that he can drive the rental car when they get there (she doesn't drive). My daughter (who has my dad's ashes) only found out yesterday, and my sister planned to leave either today or tomorrow. We are pretty sure she will tell the cousins in MO all kinds of stories about why we didn't come (my nephew didn't even know that she hadn't told us--he thought we knew but had declined), but that's not the thing that really bothers us. We know that it has to be done, but it was not her decision to make on her own. It should have been a family decision. It's not as if his ashes were going to go anywhere. It could have waited until a better time.

Thank you for letting me rant and rave and vent. I'm not looking for advice--the ashes will be turned over to her and she can go do it, and I will continue to pray for her every day as I always do, but I think this is really the last straw for my daughter and me. Sorry this is so long. I had actually written tons more, but most of that didn't need to be said. I just needed to write it, then I deleted it.
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Old 07-12-2012, 08:21 PM   #2603
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Originally Posted by Addie View Post
I too have a state issued ID. I don't drive. I once went into a bank to cash a check. The teller said that it was not a real ID. She confiscated it. Created her own melee. I asked for the bank manager. I was so angry at her stupidity. I know it wasn't my picture on it. It is one of the best pics I have ever taken. I usually take care of problems in a very soft but firm voice. Not this time. I made sure everyone in the bank heard me. All of a sudden the line behind me melted and the people went to stand in other lines. She left her window crying. I got my check cashed and my ID back.
Oh my.. I sure can understand you got angry. Plain ridiculous!
I can't believe people get that confused by an ID that's NOT a drivers license.
Ofc not everybody drives! Nonsense!
Makes me wanna boycott driving all together!
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Old 07-12-2012, 08:24 PM   #2604
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Originally Posted by Addie View Post
...Not this time. I made sure everyone in the bank heard me. All of a sudden the line behind me melted and the people went to stand in other lines. She left her window crying. I got my check cashed and my ID back.
I wasn't there but that sounds unnecessarily nasty.
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Old 07-12-2012, 08:45 PM   #2605
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Originally Posted by Barbara L View Post
I am very upset at a certain person, who shall remain nameless (but is my sister). Pretty much anything my sister has ever done has been to benefit herself. I am absolutely not exaggerating when I say that over 50% of what comes out of her mouth is a lie (probably closer to 75%, but I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt). She isn't stupid (huge reader, great at all types of puzzles, etc.), but years of meth and cocaine use, as well as hard liquor and who knows what else haven't helped any. I only tell you this to show you a little about what we have had to deal with. She can be very nice, and very generous, but you have to constantly guard against getting stabbed in the back.

Anyway, as most of you know, my dad died in November and we had his funeral in December. Since he had bought two plots (one with my mom, in CA, and one in his family plot, in MO) we had his ashes divided, with the plan to go back to Missouri in May or June, have a little family reunion, and bury the remaining ashes. Unfortunately, finances haven't allowed us to do it yet.

My vent is that my sister suddenly decided that she is going to take his ashes back to Missouri herself, and she didn't ask any of us how we felt about it, or even let any of us know her plans until she had to. She had to tell her son because she wants him to go with her so that he can drive the rental car when they get there (she doesn't drive). My daughter (who has my dad's ashes) only found out yesterday, and my sister planned to leave either today or tomorrow. We are pretty sure she will tell the cousins in MO all kinds of stories about why we didn't come (my nephew didn't even know that she hadn't told us--he thought we knew but had declined), but that's not the thing that really bothers us. We know that it has to be done, but it was not her decision to make on her own. It should have been a family decision. It's not as if his ashes were going to go anywhere. It could have waited until a better time.

Thank you for letting me rant and rave and vent. I'm not looking for advice--the ashes will be turned over to her and she can go do it, and I will continue to pray for her every day as I always do, but I think this is really the last straw for my daughter and me. Sorry this is so long. I had actually written tons more, but most of that didn't need to be said. I just needed to write it, then I deleted it.
Oh Barbara, I'm sorry you have to deal with this. You can rant all you want honey, you need to let some the tension go and just relax. You know who will deal with your sister one day. So please dont let her do anything more to upset and wound you. Be happy that James is there with you, supports you and loves you like he does. That is one thing she can't take from you tell you daughter to consider the source and to be brave. You both can and you have each other to lean on. We here all care for you and will listen any time you want to rant.
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Old 07-12-2012, 10:41 PM   #2606
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Thank you cj! I don't really let my sister get to me (I get mad, but I know what to expect of her). It is how she makes my daughter feel that really gets to me. Nancy is one of the strongest people I know, but my sister uses her (rides, helping with all kinds of things, etc., which she gladly does) and then makes Nancy feel like she has been spit on. Nancy called me yesterday to tell me about all of this, and she is fine now.

I'm glad you are here to vent to!
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Old 07-13-2012, 01:00 AM   #2607
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Originally Posted by Bolledeig
Grrr! I hate it when the cashier at the store ruins my day.
He refused to take my ID when I tried to buy my weekly dose of Corona just because it was not a Texas drivers license. What?!
Has never happened to me before.
I have a state issued ID/permanent resident card, Norwegian passport, Norwegian drivers license and another Norwegian ID card.
How are tourists supposed to get around then?
This has annoyed me all day!

Just because you havent seen the combination of colors or shapes on an ID card before doesn't mean you need to deny me my Corona or call the press.
Gosh..

I feel like I need revenge.
Really should have asked for a manager. A passport should be sufficient in the US.
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Old 07-13-2012, 10:15 AM   #2608
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Originally Posted by Bolledeig View Post
Oh my.. I sure can understand you got angry. Plain ridiculous!
I can't believe people get that confused by an ID that's NOT a drivers license.
Ofc not everybody drives! Nonsense!
Makes me wanna boycott driving all together!
On a positive note, you must look younger than your age!

Clerks in liquor stores are so afraid of getting caught of selling to minors they are sometimes overly cautious. They are taught how to spot a fake of the local driver's license so feel comfortable with that. If they see an ID that they've never seen before, they probably are concerned they don't know how to tell if it's real or fake.
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Old 07-13-2012, 10:27 AM   #2609
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When I was 25, I was carded in downtown Chicago. I showed a U.S. passport as ID. We had to go to a different bar.
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Old 07-13-2012, 10:48 AM   #2610
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Barbara L View Post
I am very upset at a certain person, who shall remain nameless (but is my sister). Pretty much anything my sister has ever done has been to benefit herself. I am absolutely not exaggerating when I say that over 50% of what comes out of her mouth is a lie (probably closer to 75%, but I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt). She isn't stupid (huge reader, great at all types of puzzles, etc.), but years of meth and cocaine use, as well as hard liquor and who knows what else haven't helped any. I only tell you this to show you a little about what we have had to deal with. She can be very nice, and very generous, but you have to constantly guard against getting stabbed in the back.

Anyway, as most of you know, my dad died in November and we had his funeral in December. Since he had bought two plots (one with my mom, in CA, and one in his family plot, in MO) we had his ashes divided, with the plan to go back to Missouri in May or June, have a little family reunion, and bury the remaining ashes. Unfortunately, finances haven't allowed us to do it yet.

My vent is that my sister suddenly decided that she is going to take his ashes back to Missouri herself, and she didn't ask any of us how we felt about it, or even let any of us know her plans until she had to. She had to tell her son because she wants him to go with her so that he can drive the rental car when they get there (she doesn't drive). My daughter (who has my dad's ashes) only found out yesterday, and my sister planned to leave either today or tomorrow. We are pretty sure she will tell the cousins in MO all kinds of stories about why we didn't come (my nephew didn't even know that she hadn't told us--he thought we knew but had declined), but that's not the thing that really bothers us. We know that it has to be done, but it was not her decision to make on her own. It should have been a family decision. It's not as if his ashes were going to go anywhere. It could have waited until a better time.

Thank you for letting me rant and rave and vent. I'm not looking for advice--the ashes will be turned over to her and she can go do it, and I will continue to pray for her every day as I always do, but I think this is really the last straw for my daughter and me. Sorry this is so long. I had actually written tons more, but most of that didn't need to be said. I just needed to write it, then I deleted it.
I too have a toxic sister. She is kind and generous, but then is confrontational and delusional, you are never quite sure which sister that you will see, I am pretty sure that she is bi-polar, but she'll never seek help for it. She has managed to push pretty much everyone away from her. An she too is intelligent, she is a high ranking military officer, but some of the things that come out of her mouth leave me shaking my head. You can make a very obvious statement and she will argue about it, even when she knows that she is wrong. My dad's death last year brought out the worst in her. The day that we knew that my dad would pass, she says "I can't be away from duty any longer", and she leaves to drive 1000 miles home! He passed before she even got out of the state.

She wants to open a business and have me bake for her, but I don't think that there is any way that I could work for her. This would be my dream job under any other circumstances, but I know better than to put myself in that position.
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