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Old 08-09-2011, 08:29 PM   #41
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Janet H
I would puree the whole mess of caned fruit and make sorbet and / or Popsicles.

For popsicles you could add in some vanilla yogurt and maybe a little extra orange extract to pop up the flavor.
Janet, I just might have to go out and get some mandarine oranges! Swirled with yogurt and frozen, that sounds really good!
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Old 08-13-2011, 01:18 PM   #42
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Yes, my mother has dementia--specifically vascular dementia because of the heart meds she has been on for years. My father also has memory issues. His are more typical of what you see in a person ageing. I live 1400 miles away and am the only child who comes to assist four times a year for a month at a time. This time, I'm having difficulties meeting my work deadlines because of Internet access issues and because my mother has deteriorated since April and is having more crisis moments. I am drafting a letter to my father because he only has 30% hearing and typically doesn't wear his hearing aids. Writing my concerns is easier than trying to shout them at him. They are financially able to hire someone to come and cook on a regular basis. My mother should be in assisted living, but my father will not consider it. I am between a rock and hard place and try to make things easier (label things, use up things, etc.) but she is getting worse faster than I can get things done. Today I found a black garbage bag in the garage that had (4) of my father's winter hats, used tissues, moldy beyond belief philly cheese, and the list goes on in it. My father was thrilled I found his hats--I was in tears as I sorted through the bag. I think she squirreled this bag away in June 2009 based on the magazines, etc., that were also in it.

I would love to bring her home with me. She is easy to have around if you are attentive to what she is doing. Right now, she is fixated on counting money, so I've given her a bunch of different denominations and suggest that she go count her money a couple of times a day. Sometimes she can, but most times she gets stuck when she has to count the bills that aren't 20s. I'm thinking of buying a Monopoly game and giving her the money from that to count...She can't dial a phone number, she can't take a phone message, and she can't fill out a check--but she can still sign her name. But yes, she has really bad days and then she has good days. The doctor wants her to stay in her home as long as possible. My brothers are of no help. One has had no contact with my parents for 4 years, the other hasn't been to visit for almost 2 years. My mother responds best to me, my father responds better to the brother who hasn't visited for 2 years. And he's in denial (well, both of them are--my dad and my brother). And, the count of cans of manderin oranges went up by four this week--even though they are on the DO NOT BUY list and the inventory count is now 27--and I've used 3 cans. I didn't know about the ones squirreled away in the broom closet when I did inventory.
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Old 08-13-2011, 01:30 PM   #43
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Oh wow, CW. What a tough spot you're in, that must be so frustrating. Thoughts with you.
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Old 08-13-2011, 04:05 PM   #44
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CWS...my heart goes out to you!....isn't there a social worker in your parent's area that you can speeak to and possibly get some live in or daily help for them?.....You MUST think of yourself first, because if you get ill, etc......you'll be no help to them at all....so do for yourself first, then look after them.....I wish you all good things!
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Old 08-13-2011, 07:24 PM   #45
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CW I know how hard this is. My mom had dementia and it got to the point I was screaming at her so often I would cry and cry each day and after every episode. Now that she has gone to join my dad I could kick myself around the block for not being more kind. I tried and both my girls helped me. I realize now dementia has many different area's. Mom's was asking over and over the same question yours is your dad hording If it were me I'd just let him hoard and bring a big bag and take the extra's to a food bank and tell him nothing. He feels I suppose he is helping your mom. He isn't but who am I to say that.? Don't beat your self up over this. Get your mom that monopoly game and pray it helps. Dementia is a nasty unforgiving illness for that I wish there were a way I might help you and your folkd. All I can do is offer good thoughts and prayers.
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Old 08-13-2011, 07:25 PM   #46
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CWS4322 View Post
Yes, my mother has dementia--specifically vascular dementia because of the heart meds she has been on for years. My father also has memory issues. His are more typical of what you see in a person ageing. I live 1400 miles away and am the only child who comes to assist four times a year for a month at a time. This time, I'm having difficulties meeting my work deadlines because of Internet access issues and because my mother has deteriorated since April and is having more crisis moments. I am drafting a letter to my father because he only has 30% hearing and typically doesn't wear his hearing aids. Writing my concerns is easier than trying to shout them at him. They are financially able to hire someone to come and cook on a regular basis. My mother should be in assisted living, but my father will not consider it. I am between a rock and hard place and try to make things easier (label things, use up things, etc.) but she is getting worse faster than I can get things done. Today I found a black garbage bag in the garage that had (4) of my father's winter hats, used tissues, moldy beyond belief philly cheese, and the list goes on in it. My father was thrilled I found his hats--I was in tears as I sorted through the bag. I think she squirreled this bag away in June 2009 based on the magazines, etc., that were also in it.

I would love to bring her home with me. She is easy to have around if you are attentive to what she is doing. Right now, she is fixated on counting money, so I've given her a bunch of different denominations and suggest that she go count her money a couple of times a day. Sometimes she can, but most times she gets stuck when she has to count the bills that aren't 20s. I'm thinking of buying a Monopoly game and giving her the money from that to count...She can't dial a phone number, she can't take a phone message, and she can't fill out a check--but she can still sign her name. But yes, she has really bad days and then she has good days. The doctor wants her to stay in her home as long as possible. My brothers are of no help. One has had no contact with my parents for 4 years, the other hasn't been to visit for almost 2 years. My mother responds best to me, my father responds better to the brother who hasn't visited for 2 years. And he's in denial (well, both of them are--my dad and my brother). And, the count of cans of manderin oranges went up by four this week--even though they are on the DO NOT BUY list and the inventory count is now 27--and I've used 3 cans. I didn't know about the ones squirreled away in the broom closet when I did inventory.
You are a good person. You are defintely earning your wings for all of the good you do for your folks. Everyone should be so lucky to have someone like you in their lives. My thoughts & prayers are with you during this difficult time. Don't forget to take care of your self too. Take care.
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Old 08-14-2011, 12:01 PM   #47
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Thanks. That was more of a vent than how to use canned mandarin oranges. I have had to move to a local motel so I can meet my deadlines. I can't afford to lose this contract. It also means that I'm not there, although I go 'home' to fix supper and make sure she takes her evening pills. My father wanders off to watch TV and she goes to bed almost immediately after supper. It is hard. If you have parents who are not at that stage yet, try and discuss with them while they are healthy what their wishes would be if either of them would get to the point that my parents are at...wish we had done that.
And, although getting help sounds like a logical choice, my mother doesn't like strangers in her house, my father doesn't want strangers in the house. Oddly, his mother was the same and it frustrated my father beyond belief, but now he is doing the same. I've lined up help with the cooking, gotten so far as to have the appointment set, only to have my dad change his mind. Not having Power of Attorney makes it nearly impossible to override my father.
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Old 08-31-2011, 11:55 AM   #48
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Quote:
Originally Posted by simonbaker View Post
I make muffins with mandarin oranges, fresh/frozen ground cranberries & wanuts.

recipe, please. these sound great!
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