"Discover Cooking, Discuss Life."

Go Back   Discuss Cooking - Cooking Forums > General Cooking Information > Cooking Resources > Terms & Techniques
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 01-04-2007, 12:33 AM   #71
The Dude Abides
 
TATTRAT's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Bermuda Native in D.C./NoVA
Posts: 5,324
Send a message via AIM to TATTRAT Send a message via Yahoo to TATTRAT Send a message via Skype™ to TATTRAT
Quote:
Originally Posted by buckytom
charlie, a gavone is italian american slang for an oafish glutton. a person who eats a lot, often like a slob.

it is based on the italian word cafone, which means a boorish person.
and from the meaning of life, Mr. Creosote :"Don't be skimpy on the pate!"


I agree with 99.9% of this thread. it is a shame that what was once Expected, AND respected is lost to all but those that make a conscience effort to keep the finer and proper things living on. My mom would be proud of the outlook of this thread.
__________________

__________________
flickr
TATTRAT is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 05:44 AM   #72
Executive Chef
 
miniman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Basingstoke, England
Posts: 4,687
It surely is all down to a combination of your culture, nationally speaking and regionally speaking, and the way you are brought up, relating to the old fashioned word -class.

I was brought up in Africa and, imo, was taught good manners. However we were also brough up with braais (African barbeques), were you would use your fingers to eat most of th meat ans a fork for salad stuff. I love things like kebabs, chicken wings and other boney things and have no problem using my fingers to eat these sort of things. My wife was brought up in England and has much more formal manners, incuding not using her fingers and more prepared items and she does not like eating food with bones in.

I agree with most of the points mentioned in this thred, but would like to stress it is important to live your life to your own standards and to bring up your children to the best you know. It is wrong to take offence at other peoples manners, and much better toaccept them as they are and I would be disgusted at someone in my household or table s******ing or laughing at another person who may not know any different. My least favourite expression is "You are embarrassing me", if you are determined to correct someone to your own way of thinking, it should be done personnally and quietly direct to the person where they cannot get embarrassed.
__________________

__________________
miniman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 05:56 AM   #73
Executive Chef
 
VeraBlue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: northern NJ
Posts: 3,683
Quote:
Originally Posted by skilletlicker
I agree but would add a corollary.
The more "soigne" you think you are, the louder the laughter.
I disagree. Your corollary suggests that everyone is laughing at people who present themselves well mannered.
__________________
How can we sleep while our beds are burning???
VeraBlue is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 06:17 AM   #74
Sous Chef
 
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 665
Ah! But there are manners, and there are manners.

There are manners which exist for the sole purpose of making others comfortable. And then there are manners which exist for the sole purpose of drawing a line between the supposedly well-bred and the ill-bred, i.e. those in the know and those pathetically lacking. Obviously, the second type of manners is exactly the opposite of the first, and yet they're both called "manners."

Dear Miss Manners, thankfully always grounded in reality, is painfully aware of the second type of manners and doesn't just try to pretend its power away:

"as if etiquette weren't magnificently capable of being used to make others feel uncomfortable!"
__________________
XeniA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 06:22 AM   #75
Head Chef
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Spain
Posts: 1,167
Not sure about that VeraBlue. Skilletlicker says "the more soigné you think you are", not simply "the more soigné you are". Think Victoria Beckham. Doubtless she thinks she's very soignée, whereas to many of us she just comes across as affected.
__________________
Snoop Puss is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 09:52 AM   #76
Certified Pretend Chef
 
Andy M.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 41,349
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ayrton
Ah! But there are manners, and there are manners.

There are manners which exist for the sole purpose of making others comfortable. And then there are manners which exist for the sole purpose of drawing a line between the supposedly well-bred and the ill-bred, i.e. those in the know and those pathetically lacking. Obviously, the second type of manners is exactly the opposite of the first, and yet they're both called "manners."

Dear Miss Manners, thankfully always grounded in reality, is painfully aware of the second type of manners and doesn't just try to pretend its power away:

"as if etiquette weren't magnificently capable of being used to make others feel uncomfortable!"

I disagree with this statement. Folks who practice 'good' manners don't do it to make others uncomfortable. They do it because it's what they learned growing up.

It would be just as absurd to say that people who have 'poor' table manners do it for the sole purpose of irritating those who do not.

Good table manners are not restricted to people of a particular racial, economic, social or geographic category. Everyone can practice it.
__________________
"If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe." -Carl Sagan
Andy M. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 12:47 PM   #77
Everymom
 
Alix's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Edmonton, Alberta
Posts: 23,184
I haven't chimed in before now, but have enjoyed reading this thread very much.

In our house, correct table manners were taught and we were expected to use them. There were six of us kids and my Dad was VERY particular about how we behaved at the table; right down to using left hand fork, right hand knife and holding them correctly, not in a fist. It made us aware of how many people do NOT have any manners at the table at all. Where I work, I deal with teens and we eat with them every day and one of the things we teach them is table manners. The simple things, like, no talking with your mouth full, don't shovel your food, use your napkin, use your utensils and not your hands...that sort of thing.

We don't go into the specifics of several forks, or anything like that, but the basics are definitely important. It seems to me that these simple things are not being taught to many kids and it is a shame indeed. They may never go to an upscale restaurant for fear of embarrassment, or they may go and behave like complete heathens and have other patrons gagging on THEIR food.

Skilletlicker, I think you are talking about those "affected" souls who think they are so above the rest of us are you not? Just trying to clarify.

I don't serve fancy meals requiring a formal place setting, but I feel confident that if my children go to a meal where a formal setting is in front of them they will handle themselves well. They are logical thinkers (which is all you need to be really) and are not shy about asking questions in a quiet and polite manner. Those are really the most important requirements of good manners I think.
__________________
You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. Robin Williams
Alix
Alix is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 01:06 PM   #78
Executive Chef
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: USA,Florida
Posts: 3,834
Right on!!!!!!!
__________________
Be an organ donor; give your heart to Jesus.
Exercise daily; walk with the Lord.
licia is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 01:29 PM   #79
Sous Chef
 
Nicholas Mosher's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 768
I think people are talking about various degrees of manners. I'm sure a fresh-graduate from charm-school would make almost all of us look like troglodytes even at a bar.

If a person is picking up ropes of spaghetti with their hands in a nice restaurant, or tossing meatballs in the air and catching them in their mouth... I see a problem. If they use the same fork for salad & dinner, or don't hold the fork the same as someone else I think thats a bit overboard. The same with some things like "No Elbows on the Table!" or "Don't touch your food with your hands!". If I'm eating pasta primavera and have a pea rolling around on my plate that just won't get onto the fork - I might use my finger (SHOCK!) - especially if my knife has something on it from a previous course that might clash with the delicate primavera sauce. If someone is put-off by this to the point that they can no longer eat their food, I think they should either mind their own business or climb down off their cross...

When eating with others you are sharing a common space. If people are being obnoxious to you then you have every right to complain. But if you are peering around analyzing the posture of someone and whether or not they are gribbing their wine glass by the stem - thats just plain nosy (in my humble opinion anyhoo).
__________________
Nick ~ "Egg whites are good for a lot of things; lemon meringue pie, angel food cake, and clogging up radiators." - MacGyver
Nicholas Mosher is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2007, 01:39 PM   #80
Master Chef
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Culpeper, VA
Posts: 5,806
Very VERY well said Nicholas. I agree with you completely.
__________________

__________________
BreezyCooking is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



» Discuss Cooking on Facebook

Our Communities

Our communities encompass many different hobbies and interests, but each one is built on friendly, intelligent membership.

» More about our Communities

Automotive Communities

Our Automotive communities encompass many different makes and models. From U.S. domestics to European Saloons.

» More about our Automotive Communities

Marine Communities

Our Marine websites focus on Cruising and Sailing Vessels, including forums and the largest cruising Wiki project on the web today.

» More about our Marine Communities


Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 03:42 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.