first, adding shortening will guarantee that it'll melt all over your fingers. a llittle shortening is used to create a really thin coat of chocolate, typically on cookies, and a section is left uncoated.
chocolate chips contain extra ingredients to help them preserve their shape while being baked. and i've had chocolate chips remain soft after
being baked for an incredibly long time. try using regular chocolate bars of good quality. they should firm up. if you don't want to go through the hassle of tempering the chocolate, just melt it over hot water and use. it'll come out looking kind of streaky, but will taste fine. and it'll still melt at a lower temp than if it were tempered.
if you're still not satisfied, get some chocolate couverture and:
i'm prettysure that these are not actually regular chocolate chips, but chips of regular chocolate, if you follow me.
a better detailed description
Chocolate Tempering - How to Temper Chocolate
it's easier to do a larger quantity than just a handful.
finally, you'll have to clean the whole house from top to bottom and do some yardwork just to burn off some of those calories