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Old 03-29-2005, 10:05 AM   #1
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advancing age

a friend, and old "poster" here, sent this to me. i liked it so much i "thought" i would "pass" this "along"... (can you "guess" who )


The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old.

I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.

Old age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body-the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, skin spots and bumps, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror, but I don't agonize over those things for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra
cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement fountain that I didn't need, but looks so avant garde on my patio.

I am entitled to overeat, to be messy, to be extravagant. I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read until 4 AM, and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 70's, and if I at the same time wish to weep over a lost love, I will.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the bikini set. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten -- and I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when a beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turn gray or even lost forever, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep groove on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver. I can say "no," and mean it. I can say "yes," and mean it. As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be.

And I shall eat dessert every single day.


Spring is finally here! I got so excited that I wet my plants...
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Old 03-29-2005, 04:15 PM   #2
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Made me feel 'great'. So appropriate. I do live with someone who looks at me in the mirror. Sure doesn't look like the way I feel. Only when I hear disappointment or my dogs get sick. Then the image is all too real. I loved this bucky; thanks for your time and sharing. I never did think age mattered, only the people who ask are worried about my age. Oprah always says it is how you feel inside that matters. I think she is so wise. Successful too.

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Old 03-29-2005, 04:45 PM   #3
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Hey Buck that is great, however, I cannot think of who may have sent it to you. Congratulate whomever, it is a great piece. I shall send it to all my age-appropriate friends and family. You really made my day. Thanks again.
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Old 03-29-2005, 06:07 PM   #4
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Thanks Bucky I loved that!
Cooking is like love, it should be entered into with abandon or not at all. Oregon native transplanted to Chicago....
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Old 03-29-2005, 06:11 PM   #5
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Thanks bucky. I'm quickly approaching my 40th (May 3rd) and have already started freaking out about it. This helped!
In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on. Robert Frost
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Old 03-30-2005, 01:30 PM   #6
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Every time my daughter tells me I need to color my hair I tell her that I earned every gray hair on my head and that they all have names.
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Old 03-30-2005, 01:43 PM   #7
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Thanks bucky, Im also reaching a Birthday, my 43rd. And i have been going through aging problems, and depressing thoughts of it. But, i too thank the one who sent it to you, But, mostly you for sharing it with us. I will take it to heart. And, work on the things that need to be changesd. And, think of the positive and happy things in my life. And,I too will share with friends and family. Thanks Bucky!!
"There is no fear in love;
but perfect love casteth out fear"
-The Bible
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Old 03-30-2005, 02:48 PM   #8
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Spring is finally here! I got so excited that I wet my plants...
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Old 03-30-2005, 11:29 PM   #9
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Thanks for the post!
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Old 03-31-2005, 08:40 AM   #10
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Great post, Bucky. Are you going to tell us who sent it to you?

I can resist anything, but temptation. Oscar Wilde
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