"Discover Cooking, Discuss Life."

Go Back   Discuss Cooking - Cooking Forums > The Back Porch > Jokes and Games
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 08-09-2005, 04:34 PM   #1
Executive Chef
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 4,677
Ordering Pizzas in the year 2010 #%#%&&^

Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I take your order?"
Customer: "Hi, I'd like to place an order to be delivered."

Operator: "May I have your NIDN first, sir?"
Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610."

Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number's 266-2566. Which number are you calling from, sir?"
Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where did you get all this information?"

Operator: "We're wired into the system, sir."
Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas..."

Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Operator: "Sir, your medical records indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice."
Customer: "Dang! Then what would you recommend?"

Operator: "You might try our low-fat Soybean Yogurt Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it."
Customer: "What makes you think I'd like something like that?"

Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir, that's why I made the suggestion."
Customer: "All right, all right! Give me two family-size ones. What's the damage?"

Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids, sir. The 'damage,' as you put it, comes to $49.99."
Customer: "Let me give you my credit card number."

Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit card balance is over its limit."
Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here."
Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account is overdrawn."
Customer: "Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?

Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while you're out getting the cash, but carrying pizzas on a motorcycle will be a little awkward."
Customer: "How the heck do you know I'm riding a bike?"

Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repossessed. But your Harley's paid up, so I just assumed you'd be using it."
Customer: "@#%/$@&?#!"

Operator: "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop."
Customer: (Speechless)

Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?"
Customer: "No, nothing. Oh, yeah, don't forget the two free liters of Coke your ad says I get with the pizzas."

Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics."

__________________

__________________
wasabi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2005, 04:46 PM   #2
Chef Extraordinaire
 
mudbug's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: NoVA, beyond the Beltway
Posts: 11,166
jeez louise, PLEASE God, don't let it come to this!
__________________

__________________
Kool Aid - Think before you drink.
mudbug is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2005, 06:34 PM   #3
Head Chef
 
KAYLINDA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: CHERRYVALE, KANSAS
Posts: 1,313
The funniest thing I've read all day! Thank you so much!
__________________
KAYLINDA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2005, 07:26 PM   #4
Chef Extraordinaire
 
middie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Cleveland,Ohio USA
Posts: 16,264
Send a message via Yahoo to middie
if it evers comes to this i'm never ordering pizza again !!
__________________
middie is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



» Discuss Cooking on Facebook

Our Communities

Our communities encompass many different hobbies and interests, but each one is built on friendly, intelligent membership.

» More about our Communities

Automotive Communities

Our Automotive communities encompass many different makes and models. From U.S. domestics to European Saloons.

» More about our Automotive Communities

Marine Communities

Our Marine websites focus on Cruising and Sailing Vessels, including forums and the largest cruising Wiki project on the web today.

» More about our Marine Communities


Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:48 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.