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Old 08-23-2005, 10:04 PM   #1
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Situations in Life

Never raise your hands to your wife... it leaves your groin unprotected.

I'm not into working out. My pholosophy: No pain, no pain.

I am in shape. Round's a shape.

I'm trying to figure out why kaikaze pilots wore helmets.

I always wanted to be somebody. I should have been more specific.

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he get mad, but when he's in a car he sticks his head out the window ?

Have you ever noticed anybody driving slower than you is an idiot and anyone driving faster is a maniac ?

You have to stay in shape, My grandmother started walking when she was 60. Today's she's 97 and we have no idea where she is.

The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they'd never be caught dead in otherwise.

I have six locks on my dorr all in a row. When I leave I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks they're always locking three.

I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. Thay always say because they're such beautiful animals. There you go, I think my mother's beautiful, but I only have photographs of her.

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Old 08-23-2005, 10:17 PM   #2
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cut, pasted and passed on to everyone
on my list. Thanks!!
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Old 08-23-2005, 10:33 PM   #3
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Funny. I had a good chuckle. See! Even with all that sewage in your basement, you can still laugh!
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Old 08-23-2005, 11:18 PM   #4
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Sandy I think in times like this you have to have some kind of humor or you'd go beserk !!
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Old 08-23-2005, 11:42 PM   #5
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Keep your chin up kiddo, things will get better. They always do for the big hearted like you.

kadesma
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Old 08-24-2005, 01:30 AM   #6
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That was good!!! Thanks for sharing!
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Old 08-24-2005, 08:40 AM   #7
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Thats great i'm cutting and pasting!
I have one from a notepad on spelling Why does phonics start with ph?
Why is dyslexia so hard to spell?
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Old 08-24-2005, 09:54 AM   #8
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Ever hear the one about the....

(for mrsmac)

Dyslexic, insomniac, agnostic?

He would lie awake all night, wondering if there really is a dog.

-sandyj
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Old 08-24-2005, 11:10 AM   #9
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they are all funny as heck!!!! Thanks for the laughs!
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Old 08-25-2005, 08:02 PM   #10
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What a great way to just relax and enjoy

Thanks everyone
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