It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' centre.After the community sing song led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the Star of the Show, Harvey the Hypnotist!
Harvey explained that he was going toput the whole audience into a trance.
"Yes, each and every one of you ...and all at the same time!", said Harvey.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Harvey carefully withdrew from his waistcoat pocket a beautiful antique goldpocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Harvey, holding the watch high for all to see.
"It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations", said Harvey.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch..."
The audience became mesmerised as the watch swayed back and forth, the lights twinkling as they were reflected from it's gleaming surfaces.
One hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch.
And then,suddenly,the chain broke!!!
The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact.
"SH@T!" exclaimed Harvey.
It took them 3 days to clean the Senior Citizens Centre and Harvey the hypnotist was never invited to entertain again!
"I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass."
"I hear voices and they don't like you "