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Old 04-25-2013, 07:38 PM   #3911
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you guys outdid yourselves today!
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Old 04-25-2013, 09:58 PM   #3912
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Old 04-25-2013, 10:00 PM   #3913
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all!!
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Old 04-25-2013, 10:18 PM   #3914
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kylie1969 View Post
The Seniors Chant

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Old 04-25-2013, 11:10 PM   #3915
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First I have to stop laughing so I can type. Kylie, are you deliberately trying to have me go from aches in my side from laughing? Both of them are absolutely hilarious.

ROFLACGU! You have outdid yourself girl.
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Old 04-26-2013, 01:47 AM   #3916
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I am so pleased you loved them Mrs L and Ads....they certainly do tickle the old funny bone

Yes I particularly liked ROFLACGU too
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Old 04-26-2013, 01:48 AM   #3917
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Yesterday, my daughter asked me again why I don’t do something useful with my time.
It seems to be her favourite topic of conversation whenever we've gotten together recently.
She suggested I go to the senior centre and hang out with the guys. I did this, but all the while I was thinking about how to teach her to stay out of my business.
The next day, I told her that I had joined a parachuting club. She said, “Are you nuts? You’re almost 72 years old and you’re going to start jumping out of aeroplanes?”
I proudly showed her that I even got a membership card. She said to me, “Good grief, where are your glasses?! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club!”
“I don’t know what to do,” I told her. “I signed up for five jumps a week.”
She fainted.
Life as a senior citizen is not getting any easier, but sometimes it can be fun.
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Old 04-26-2013, 01:52 AM   #3918
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My memory is really bad so I changed my password to "incorrect"

That way, when I log in with the wrong password, the computer will tell me, "your password is incorrect"

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Old 04-26-2013, 02:00 AM   #3919
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"Ode to getting old"

Just a line to say I'm living, That I'm not among the dead Though I'm getting more forgetful And something's slipping in my head;
I got used to arthritis, To my dentures I'm resigned. I can manage my bifocals, But oh, how much I miss my mind.

For sometimes I cannot remember When I stand atop the stairs, If I must go down for something Or if I've just come up from there.

And before the fridge, so often My mind is filled with nagging doubt. Have I just put food away, or Have I come to take some out.

I called a friend not long ago, When they answered I just moaned. I hung up quickly without speaking, For I'd forgotten who I'd phoned.

And when the darkness falls upon me I stand alone and scratch my head. I don't know if I'm retiring, Or just getting out of bed?

Once I stood in my own bathroom, Wondering if I'd used the pot. I flushed it just in case I had And sat down just in case I'd not.

So, now if it's my turn to write you. There's no need for getting sore It may be that I think I've written And don't need to write no more.

Now I stand beside the mail box With a face so very red Instead of mailing you the letter I have opened it instead.
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Old 04-26-2013, 02:02 AM   #3920
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Senior citizen exercise program

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.
But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
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