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Old 07-21-2014, 08:08 AM   #6061
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Old 07-21-2014, 10:38 AM   #6062
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsLMB View Post
That ain't right!

It's funny, it just ain't right I tell ya!
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Old 07-21-2014, 12:56 PM   #6063
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A kindergarten teacher was roving through her group of little ones during an art exercise. She came to one little girl and could not make out her picture. "What are you painting" she asked the little girl. "A picture of God" the little girl answered confidently. To which the teacher answered "But nobody has seen God." To which the little girl answered "They will when I'm done with this."
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Old 07-21-2014, 01:19 PM   #6064
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Wink

A child reciting the Lord's prayer....

"Our father...watch out in heaven..."
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Old 07-21-2014, 08:04 PM   #6065
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BEST SWIMMING HOLE JOKE from swimmingholes.org

Two Ole' Boys are at a swimming hole in the woods and are amazed at the size of it.

"Wow, that's some hole; I can't even see the bottom. I wonder how deep it is?"

"I don't know. Let's throw somethin' down there, and see how long it takes to hit bottom."

"Hey, there's an old car transmission over there. Give me a hand, we'll throw it in and see."

So they pick it up and carry it over and count one, two, three and heave it in the hole.

They are standing there listening, looking over the edge, when they hear a rustling behind them. As they turn around, they see a goat come crashing through the underbrush, run up to the hole and, without hesitation, jump in headfirst.

While they are standing there staring at each other in amazement, peering into the hole, trying to figure out what that was all about, an old farmer saunters up. "Say there," says the farmer, "You fellers didn't happen to see my goat around here anywhere, did you?"

One of the Ole' Boys says, "Funny you should ask, but we were just standing here a minute ago and a goat came running out of the bushes doin' 'bout a hunnert miles an hour and jumpedheadfirst into this here hole!"

The old farmer said, "Naw, that's impossible. I had him chained to a transmission."
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Old 07-23-2014, 10:15 AM   #6066
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Old 07-23-2014, 10:24 AM   #6067
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The "answer" will always be half the "add six" number. So if your first number is "add x" the answer will be 1/2x. Add 4, answer 2 etc.
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Old 07-23-2014, 10:47 AM   #6068
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One from Blue Collar comedian Bill Engvall: A Truck driver carrying an oversized load couldn't quite clear one of the overpass bridges and was stuck fast. A policeman drove up and asked the truck driver the wrong question: "Gee, you're really stuck under this bridge?" To which the exasperated truck driver replied "Nah, I was just delivering this bridge and ran out of fuel." (here's yer sign)
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Old 07-23-2014, 12:26 PM   #6069
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Yup

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Old 07-23-2014, 12:38 PM   #6070
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How'd you find that picture of me?
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