Do you 'really' enjoy this time of year?

[LEFSElover]

For many it's joyous and for some it's a time of stress.
It's lovely to view the adornments and hear the music and see the sights but hard to get into it somehow.

Where as it's supposed to be one way, around this household my husband and I discuss just wanting to go away over the holiday.

It's hard to say why but it's just come to that. It's asking a lot of anyone to admit, but right now, I'd appreciate knowing how others deal with the angst and stress that accompany this time of year.

We know and appreciate the reason for the season and are extremely grateful, that goes without saying. It appears set aside in lue of buying/spending/getting/going stuff.

What is your take on this season and how do you deal with the angst that can be associated with it?

 

[Bilby]

To me it is a laborious time of year which usually means hours of driving on the day for me, so I get very tired just thinking about it. Not so bad driving out but driving home again is frought with danger as people who don't usually drive are suddenly thrust behind the wheel because the other parties have been drinking, or worse, the person behind the wheel has been drinking. There is the rush of the morning to leave, (no relaxing Christmas Day breakfast here!), the looks we then get cos we didn't arrive earlier, and yet they still aren't ready when we get there. Then for every minute we are at lunch, is equal to two minutes in the car. Then when we get home, we get to run around feed cats, freshen up, and get back in the car again to see the rest of the family. By the time we get home again, I am done.

This year sounds like a quiet Christmas, and I won't be unhappy!!!

 

[kadesma]

Lefse,
yes it is stressful and yes you want to run and hide..But, you do the same thing over and over until you just want to leave town. I've felt that way, but kept doing this for my kids, and then the grandkids..The cooking, the shopping, the oh dear I forgot to get something for, etc etc get to you and you get a tad resentful..Of course Christmas, watching the babies and seeing their faces makes you feel warm and fuzzy..But the day after, you think what the dickens do I do this for..Let me tell you, get sick, and have the things you always do yanked away, yes it really hurts, but, the stress is less letting someone else in to help you, doing less persents per person sure eases things up as well..I adore my family and would go get the moon for them, but, after all that has happened, I finally realize that when they say mom, one gift is enough, we just want to be here with you..It is enough and I've been given the best gift of all, the love of my family..So, yes, the holidays use to be very stressful, but I still love them and being able to see and be here one more time.So, change your routine to fit you and your DH the other will fall in line..I bet they will even say yahooo
kadesma

 

[PytnPlace]

Although a part of me enjoys this time of year, I mostly find it to be a big double helping of stress. Expectations are too high. Too much to do, not enough time. And it seems that bulk of the work involved falls into the lap of the lady in the house. I decorate the house, the tree, the porch, do the shopping, menu planning, cooking, wrapping, baking, Christmas cards, etc. etc.

Ugh, I gotta go!

 

[Andy M.]

It takes me awhile to get into the holiday. Once the spirit catches up with me, I get into it and don't mind the extra effort required to deal with the parties, open houses, family get togethers, travel, etc.

This yea SO and I are flying to Florida to spend Christmas with her family and take a short trip to Epcot. My daughter-in-law has already told me she would send me a menu to cook for our TWO Christmas dinners.

 

[Bilby]

My daughter-in-law has already told me she would send me a menu to cook for our TWO Christmas dinners.

At least she HAS warned you Andy!!

 

[DawnT]

Christmas

We have hosted Christmas breakfast for DH's family for 20+ yrs now. Sometimes it is in the am and sometimes the pm but always on Christmas. We are never able to please every sibling as to time or to what they are to bring for the meal but I remind them that they choose to come to our house because DH is the only son, and I am the only insane person willing to host for over 30 people!! Also, we always have Christmas for my side of the family to do during Christmas day, usually around 1:00 pm. Somewhere in there, between it all, the children and grandchildren come to exchange gifts also!! Isn't Christmas grand!!!
Stress lasts minutes, memories a lifetime.
DawnT

 

[buckytom]

this year is gonna be great.

i'm sorry it's stressful for you and yours lefse. maybe you could go out and rent yourself a three and a half year old that really believes in santa claus?

i couldn't have been more happy to see my boy, mesmerized, as he watched (and understood) "fosty the snowman" and "santa claus is coming to town" for the first time. his eyes we glazed over throughout, mouth agape. (i fed him a huge dinner by stuffing forkfuls into his mouth that night ).
he woke up in the middle of the night, and ran to get his newest favourite toys to sleep with, so the burger meister meisterburger wouldn't get them. it was really cute.

also, at this age you have to employ every technique available to get cooperation from a toddler, so a little threat of notifying santa about bad behaviour goes a long way.

besides the home front, i'm back in charge of my dept.'s christmas party at work. there's usually a few people who get involved, all butting heads to try to get things done their way. but this year, i was given the ball to run with. so i'm doing the cooking, while everyone else brings in appetizers and desserts. i'm making a salad, sunday gravy, 2 lasagnas (1 sausage, 1 veggie), pasta primavera, and chicken piccata.

the only down side is that i might have to come into work on christmas day if a person, low in seniority but has certain tricks to pull (ain't equality in the workplace great? ) so that if she doesn't get it off, no one does. i'm hoping if that happens, i'll do a very short 10a to 6p shift, which will end up being more like am 11-4.

i love shopping this time of year as well. i guess it's the provider/ hunter gathherer instinct in me, but i love to buy my wife and family presents. even if it costs 'till it hurts, i'll find some way to pay for it.


anyway, i hope everyone who feels badly at this time of year can remember when it was like in a child's eyes, magical and exciting, and maybe feel a little bit of the spirit of the season.

if not, then no prob. somebody's gotta be on the bad list, or else it's a scam... he hee.

 

[GotGarlic]

I enjoy it a lot more since I started doing the shopping online We don't have children, so we only go all out with decorating when we're hosting an exchange student (every other year) and so have teenage help DH and I might take a small trip together somewhere - our families are both WAY out of state (MI, IL, CA) and we don't go where they have snow for Christmas anymore, so it will probably be just the two of us. Some finishing touches on our kitchen renovation project will probably be our gift to each other.

 

[Barb L.]

Thank goodness for grandchildren, especially when one is 3 yrs. old. Christmas would probably be so much different without them. Since we retired, we buy just for the grandsons. Having a big dinner is my gift to the rest. We don't entertain, or have family to visit. Sometimes I have to force myself to decorate. But once started I am fine, love my tree in the morning with my coffee - the only lights on. Christmas has always been my favorite holiday, just takes a little more effort now.

 

[Callisto in NC]

Hate it. Wish it was January.

 

[mikki]

I usually like this time of year and have pretty much everything bought for everyone,but this year is tough, I've been out of work since March and most of our family is in Florida for the first time so our Christmas is not going to be very joyous. The one thing that really bothers me is even though the girls (15 & 18) say they understand that there probably won't be anything under the tree this year, it bothers me to not be able to get them anything.

 

[LEFSElover]

Hate it. Wish it was January.

I have children and grands too. I have been there in the early years with our kids loving and looking so forward to the big day.
But it's always brought on angst as I can't please everyone, get everywhere < on time, get every gift just right and have any time for me. My husband and I have always thought, gad, we don't get to enjoy the holiday cause we've always had to drive to this or that relatives house and there's not relaxing for us from the start of the day forward. That's it, I'm moving to an island.

I don't hate Christmas like you Callisto, but with you I am in wishing it was just good old January.

 

[Barb L.]

Lefse, start a new tradition, stay home on Christmas day and visit and do what needs to be done another day. My friend has a big family get together every Christmas - but the weekend before. This way she is home with just her family. Relaxing day, welllll maybe- lol

 

[Callisto in NC]

I have a 16 year old, sitting at home is not relaxing, it's exasperating. She's currently into loud music and talking on the internet and expects a TV for a gift. I'm looking forward to our convention in January dealing with 1500 brick people more than I'm looking forward to the weekend of Christmas. I should get a job and volunteer to work that day.

 

[Katie H]

When Buck and I lived back East, all 5 of our children lived at home or nearby. Since moving here 13 years ago, 4 of them have married and 2 have children of their own. None of them live near us. The closest 3 live in the Atlanta, GA area. So, since moving here, we've celebrated Christmas by ourselves.

I shop/make gifts all year long...always have...and, as a result, it's rare I get caught up in the mayhem of shopping, malls, etc. That's one great stress I don't have to worry about. And, because all our family live so far away, I have to get all their gifts mailed well before the holiday. Another stress eliminated or reduced.

Because it's only Buck and me, I do minimal decorating, especially since it has always fallen on my shoulders to decorate and to UNdeocrate when the holiday is over.

Now, as for THE day, Buck and I really, really enjoy it. We get up late, have a nice "special" breakfast and then go into the family room to open gifts. We always have bourbon and ginger ale while we open our gifts and have our favorite Christmas music playing in the background.

Then...we take our time. It is not unusual for us to draw out the gift-opening for 3 hours or more. By mid-afternoon, we're nice and mellow (bourbon and ginger ale helps here), the family room floor is full of torn wrapping paper and ribbon. All this is pure fun for our inside kitties, who think they've died and gone to heaven and they pop in and out of the mess on the floor.

At this point, we decide we should get out of our jammies and put on some "real" clothes. We spend the rest of the day playing with all our goodies, which is usually heavy on music to play and books (especially cookbooks) and talking on the phone with our children, grandchildren and Buck's mom, as well as my brothers and sisters.

I prepare a nice dinner and, when it's all said and done, we crawl into bed at the end of the day happy and grateful.

 

[stassie]

I feel like a bit of a loner, after reading this thread - I actually really enjoy this time of year.

When I was growing up, my family decided that they weren't going to 'do' Christmas. They gave us a couple of presents at the start of the holidays (so we wouldn't feel left out when we went back to school) but that was pretty much it.

My DH and I do more than they did, but I'm lucky that his family is also pretty relaxed about it. We don't exchange gifts. We'll usually go away for a bit of a holiday, often with my husband's family, but we don't always even do that. This year, we're heading to the south island with his brother and sister, their families, and some other friends. We'll be spending christmas day driving / on the ferry. It'll be great (I'm looking forward to it already).

We have a gift pool at work, and I'll make the other four ladies in my office something special as well. I'll buy a present for my DH (it's a great chance to give him a treat). I'll get a little something for my little brothers and sisters too. Otherwise, that's my gift giving done.

Sometimes I'll decorate the house. I didn't last year, cos we'd just moved in. I probably will this year, cos the tree looks so pretty. But if I don't feel like it, I won't.

I love all the specials on the shops (it's the only time of year that baking goods come on special here, it seems!) and I love the late-night shopping. Mum and Dad farm, so they'll be given a few free hams from companies they buy from - we'll get one, and it's the only time I get ham (mmm....)

 

[*amy*]

It's hard to get into the "Holiday" spirit, when it's 80 degrees/beach weather, & looking up at Palm trees. Guess, at this stage of "the game" I'm sort of apathetic - not necessarily jaded. IMO, the Holidays are more about kids/family and giving thanks (being grateful). Since my family is gone, & I have no little ones, it's really just another day on the calendar for me. I love picking the perfect gift for friends any time of the year. Giving to those who who have very little or nothing and appreciating what I have (not in terms of money) puts this time of year in prespective (for me). I see so many homeless people & folks that have lost their homes to fires here, on the news - & that, breaks my heart. Over the years I have donated a lot. That gives me a sense of selfless giving, with no thank you needed.

The only thing that irks me about the Holidays is, the "obligatory" gift-giving & how much one spends on a gift. In years gone by, I felt stressed when I could not take time off because of work. Guess, it's part of growing up & moving past the little things that don't mean anything; & concentrating on the people & things in life that are most/more important.

 

[QSis]

I have often thought I'd like to take off to the Caribbean the day after Thanksgiving, and return home on January 2nd.

However, I have a teeny family, who won't be around forever. So, when I'm all that's left, and I'm able to spend the holidays on an island, I will be sorely missing these times and all the effort that is currently driving me nuts.

Joni Mitchell sang, "Don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you've got till it's gone." I try to keep that in mind.

Lee

 

[stassie]

The only thing that irks me about the Holidays is, the "obligatory" gift-giving & how much one spends on a gift.

I was so impressed yesterday when my colleague let us know that she didn't intend to get us any presents - she is limiting her gift-giving to family. Seriously - we both know that the bottle of wine or whatever she would have given me isn't worth the extra stress for her. I'll make her some goodies, but it's nice that she was happy to pipe up so I won't expect anything from her, and she won't worry wondering whether I did (and am consequently offended)