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The True Story Of St. Patrick's Day

The reason the Irish celebrate St. Patrick's Day is because this is when St.Patrick drove the Norwegians out of Ireland.

It seems that some centuries ago, many Norwegians came to Ireland to escape the bitterness of the Norwegian winter. Ireland was having a famine at the time, and food was scarce. The Norwegians were eating almost all the fish caught in the area, leaving the Irish with nothing to eat but potatoes. St. Patrick, taking matters into his own hands, as most Irishmen do, decided the Norwegians had to go.

Secretly, he organized the Irish IRATRION (Irish Republican Army to Rid Ireland of Norwegians). Irish members of IRATRION passed a law in Ireland that prohibited merchants from selling ice boxes or ice to the Norwegians, in hopes that their fish would spoil. This would force the Norwegians to flee to a colder climate where their fish would keep.

Well, the fish spoiled, all right, but the Norwegians, as everyone knows today, thrive on spoiled fish So, faced with failure, the desperate Irishmen sneaked into the Norwegian fish storage caves in the dead of night and sprinkled the rotten fish with lye, hoping to poison the Norwegian invaders.

But, as everyone knows, the Norwegians thought this only added to the flavor of the fish, and they liked it so much they decided to call it "lutefisk", which is Norwegian for "luscious fish."

Matters became even worse for the Irishmen when the Norwegians started taking over the Irish potato crop and making something called "lefse."

Poor St. Patrick was at his wit's end, and finally on March 17th, he blew his top and told all the Norwegians to "GO TO H**L". So they all got in their boats and emigrated to Minnesota---- the only other paradise on earth where smelly fish, old potatoes and plenty of cold weather can be found in abundance.

The End.
 
ROFL!!!!

A tale beautifully told, PF, and so true!!! Thanks!!!

This will be shared!!!
 
I have never celebrated St. Patrick's before. But I will now. :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO: I am going to take up drinking so I can yell SKOAL! Or whatever Norwegians yell when drinking.:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:
 
I have never celebrated St. Patrick's before. But I will now. :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO: I am going to take up drinking so I can yell SKOAL! Or whatever Norwegians yell when drinking.:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

Close enough.

You have to start drinking Addie ;) I was just telling Princess Fiona how much fun it would be to go to bars with you and her and be rowdy and get kicked out.

We could be "Hell's Grannies" (even though you are the only actual granny).
 
Close enough.

You have to start drinking Addie ;) I was just telling Princess Fiona how much fun it would be to go to bars with you and her and be rowdy and get kicked out.

We could be "Hell's Grannies" (even though you are the only actual granny).

Heck, if I can kicked out of funerals and church, bars should be no problem. I have never had an alcoholic drink in my life. I have friends that cook with wine and other alcohol enhanced food. They think that when they cook for me, they have to leave the alcohol out. As long as they cook the alcohol out so that I don't taste the rawness of it, I am fine with it in food. Most Italians put red wine in their pasta gravy.

One time when I was about 18, someone gave me a small glass of straight Scotch. Once I got past the smell of it, I took a small sip. I immediately spit it out right back into the glass. That is my whole career with alcohol. When I have food in a restaurant and can taste the alcohol, I send the dish right back to the kitchen. It usually happens with seafood dishes. My friends know that I don't allow alcohol in my home. So when I visit their home, they hide their drinking. I don't care if anyone drinks outside my home. I don't care where they drink. Just not in my home. I don't care if they get rip roaring drunk. Just not in my home.

The one thing I don't understand is if alcohol smells and tastes as bad as that sip of Scotch did, why do people drink? I guess I have been scarred for life by that one sip. :ohmy:
 
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ah.....polish vs Polish. We had a similar discussion at work today, someone put on their task post-it "Finish / Polish Document"

So today.. we are in a meeting with the customer. There are about 15 people in the room,managers,customer team members...I'm up at the podium running the power point presentation.... hit next slide for the presenter.. and what do I see on the slide it large font ...

yep... you guessed it....

Finish / Polish Document

I couldn't react... but I really wanted to.
 
While on vacay in Mexico, we stop at the local grocery store for provisions and pick up some bananas, which DH can't do without in the morning. I thought they looked a bit strange, but when in Rome, etc. This morning, DH peeled and took a big bite, and YUCK! Plantains....

Funny, as Plantans is the same word for both plantains and bananas. I had to reassure him when we went back to the store that the new bananas labeled plantanas were actually bananas!

Plan to fry and eat the plantains later.
 
Close enough.

You have to start drinking Addie ;) I was just telling Princess Fiona how much fun it would be to go to bars with you and her and be rowdy and get kicked out.

We could be "Hell's Grannies" (even though you are the only actual granny).

Heh! I am a Granny, too! 5 Grandkids...:LOL:
 
I got the biggest laugh from a laundromat owner when I complained that ALL my clothes came out covered in Pooh...I must have had 7 Winnie-the-Pooh t-shirts.
 
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