"Discover Cooking, Discuss Life."

Go Back   Discuss Cooking - Cooking Forums > General Cooking Information > Menu Planning > Today's Menu
Click Here to Login
View Poll Results: How do you determine what each diner pays when you go out to eat as part of a group?
Each diner/couple pays an equal share 9 22.50%
Each diner/couple pays for exactly what they ate or drank 12 30.00%
Each diner/couple pays for approximately what they ate or drank 11 27.50%
One person pays the whole tab. 2 5.00%
Other (please explain) 6 15.00%
Voters: 40. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 07-26-2006, 08:24 AM   #21
Senior Cook
 
VegasDramaQueen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 316
Quote:
Originally Posted by licia
I agree separate checks for each couple. We had "friends" who always insisted on splitting the check...the only thing they had several drinks and we didn't, so we were always overpaying. After a few times of this, I told dh I would not go to dinner with them at all. I would really like to know what the thinking would be from someone who did this. Were we being suckers? If they considered us friends, why would they do that to us? Why would anyone think it is ok for one couple to subsidize another couple in such a way? Of course, if we invite someone to dinner, we pay all unless it is a situation where we just meet people and all pay our share. We had a rather strange situation once with someone we ate with and he put the meal on company charge card, but we paid him in cash. I thought that was very tacky, to say nothing of being dishonest. We were not clients.
There is a simple solution to this problem. If your friends are big drinkers and you don't drink at all, just ask the waitress for a separate bar tab. This is done very often and will solve that problem in a hurry. You may be surprised at how little your friends will drink then.
VegasDramaQueen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 11:01 AM   #22
Sous Chef
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 605
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andy M.
When you go out to dinner as part of a group or with a friend, how do you handle the calculation of how much each person pays?

Let's assume this is not a 'thank you' dinner where you would pay it all. Just a group of folks who agreed to get together for a meal.
You made it very clear that this is not any kind of thank you but just a friendly dinner. So in that case, the tab should be equally divided. Yeah, sure, sometimes one person or couple may feel a bit cheated if they ate or drank less and yeah, sure, it could be a problem if this same group or individuals eat together often and that happens, but in general, it is easiest and, IMHO, good form to divide the total by the number of people or couples. I don't like the idea of people sitting around the table with calculators.

Having said that, though, if one person who did eat or drink substantially more than the rest pipes up with an offer to increase his or her share, then I think it's perfectly okay for the rest to take him up on his offer.
suzyQ3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 12:34 PM   #23
Head Chef
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 1,984
Quote:
Originally Posted by buckytom
let's say andy m. and his s.o. felt that they only had the chicken specials, "house" instead of fancy salads, no oysters, and only coffee after dinner, andy would then only put up $60 bucks to cover his share plus a measly tip, and quickly take off to the front door where the valet awaits with his ferrari .
WOW! Andy has a Ferrari? Buck up the cash you cheapskate!
vagriller is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 01:33 PM   #24
Executive Chef
 
amber's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: USA,Maine
Posts: 4,099
I think it's easier on the waitstaff if one person pays the bill, and then get reimbursed by the others or take turns paying the bill.
amber is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 01:47 PM   #25
Executive Chef
 
Half Baked's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,927
I voted for #3, the approximate one. Mr HB and I enjoy our cocktails but always insist on paying more, if the other couple doesn't drink or has one glass of wine.

We used to get stiffed on splitting the bill when we'd all be on our boats, for example, and meet at a restaurant for dinner. Someone would always say, "Lets split it 8 ways". My kids may have eaten the lobster and crab platter or a hot dog but they certainly didn't drink.

It doesn't matter how much money you have, it should be split fairly, if splitting the bill is the norm.
__________________
Jan
Please spay and neuter your pets. The Animal Rescue Site
Half Baked is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 01:54 PM   #26
Master Chef
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Culpeper, VA
Posts: 5,803
Since we're always out with friends, we always "rough it out". The bill comes, the "guys" round everything up per couple plus tip & that's that.

I could never understand why this is such an issue. Based on some of the replies here, I'm surprised some of you go out to eat at all - lol!!!!!
BreezyCooking is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 02:10 PM   #27
Head Chef
 
auntdot's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,418
A lot of good opinions here.

Kinda go with BT and IC on this one, with agreement with a number of others.

Usually just split the check evenly.

But one must be fair.

If someone had a glass of water and a small green salad, we just leave them out of the pot, if they want to toss in a few bucks it is up to them.

If we order the foie gras and the two pound lobsters and they order much less, just take a quick look at the check and say why don't you toss in X money and we will take care of the rest. Or we just pick up the check.

Hate it when we go out with a crowd we do not know well and everyone is left sorta free to toss in what they owe.

Have been in situations where the few of us remaining have had to pay far more than we have eaten or drank.

Or have a number of times had to chip in enough to make a decent tip.

Have had the experience, although not for many years, of having someone with a calculator at the table.

That is not a pleasant way in my opinion to end a meal.

We believe in paying our fair share and are very disappointed when others feel they do not have to.

All I can suggest is choose your dinner companions carefully, and learn to not go out with the cheapskates.
auntdot is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 02:29 PM   #28
Master Chef
 
cara's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Hannover, Germany
Posts: 5,781
we usually pay for our things... it's no problem for the waiter to count our things together, so we know what to pay...
__________________
LiGruess cara ~~~ Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"
cara is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 02:40 PM   #29
Sous Chef
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 605
Quote:
Originally Posted by amber
I think it's easier on the waitstaff if one person pays the bill, and then get reimbursed by the others or take turns paying the bill.
It may be easier on the waitstaff, but it could be very problematic for the individuals, some of whom undoubtedly wanted to pay by credit card and now can't -- plus, there's the matter of having the correct amount to pay that one person, who may now have to bug the waitstaff for change.

As for taking turns, I think that's a great idea, but only if this is a group who regularly dines together.
suzyQ3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 03:56 PM   #30
Sous Chef
 
Chef_Jen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Scottish Borders of England
Posts: 516
Send a message via MSN to Chef_Jen Send a message via Yahoo to Chef_Jen
Well if im out with friends.. like good friends its split in half NO matter who drank what ate what etc. but thats my inner friends.. we always say (for example if the bill is 100.45 and there is 3 of us) we always put in 40 or so in each.

However if its with people who we dont know well or want to pay for what they had we do it this way

each item on the bill example
$23.89
$10.98
$2.78
etc etc etc

we round it like
24.00
11.00
3.00 and each person pays for what they ate but we round to the nearest dollar..

THEN we see how much is left of for a tip and it usually ends up we each chip in an extra 5-10 for tip
Chef_Jen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 04:03 PM   #31
Sous Chef
 
Chef_Jen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Scottish Borders of England
Posts: 516
Send a message via MSN to Chef_Jen Send a message via Yahoo to Chef_Jen
SIDE NOTE: LOl my husband just said..


"we never have this problem we have no friends.. thats the solution"

LOL
Chef_Jen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 04:08 PM   #32
Executive Chef
 
Half Baked's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,927
LOL Jen...maybe if you didn't travel all over the world every month, you'd be home long enough to make friends.
__________________
Jan
Please spay and neuter your pets. The Animal Rescue Site
Half Baked is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 05:06 PM   #33
Sous Chef
 
Chef_Jen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Scottish Borders of England
Posts: 516
Send a message via MSN to Chef_Jen Send a message via Yahoo to Chef_Jen
LOL well garth brooks has friends in low places and i have friends all over the world..

i cant help it if hes not a traveller lol

...... did i mention i was off to australia next
Chef_Jen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 05:41 PM   #34
Executive Chef
 
VeraBlue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: northern NJ
Posts: 3,683
it depends

It's never all one way or the other. Usually we would split it evenly, regardless of who had what. Other times, if it's people we dine with often enough, we take turns picking up the check.
__________________
How can we sleep while our beds are burning???
VeraBlue is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 06:20 PM   #35
Executive Chef
 
Half Baked's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,927
Are you going to visit anyone I know in Australia?
__________________
Jan
Please spay and neuter your pets. The Animal Rescue Site
Half Baked is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 06:22 PM   #36
Sous Chef
 
Chef_Jen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Scottish Borders of England
Posts: 516
Send a message via MSN to Chef_Jen Send a message via Yahoo to Chef_Jen
yes,Yes i am
Chef_Jen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 06:56 PM   #37
Assistant Cook
 
kats's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: San Diego, CA, USA
Posts: 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drama Queen
If you chose to eat only 2 appies and a couple of glasses of wine, your tab could have equaled the same as everyone else's. I went to lunch yesterday with 5 other women. I had two appetizers and a Bloody Mary. Apps = 16.00. Bloody Mary = 4.75. My bill was a dollar more than the average at the table. In Michigan when we dine with our friends we split the check equally among the number of diners. In the West Coast we ask for separate checks. If you split the bill what can it cost you extra? So you pay a buck or two more for your dinner. The worst thing in the world to me is to have someone sitting at the table with a freakin' calculator figuring each diner's portion to the penny. That' so tacky. If you rally feel strongly about this and you know that you will eat far less than the rest of the group, ask for a separate check. Enjoy your friends and your lunch/dinner and don't sweat the extra couple of bucks. You can get them next time.

I agree! It's terrible to end the evening over mathematics, with pens, calculators or whatever. For me, it ruins a nice time. I clicked on the first option (dividing equally) because maybe one day you'll spend more and on the other day you'll spend less, so in the end, that's ok. But I'm fair enough to suggest that someone that just came for a drink is left out of the sharing.

For example, if we are in a group of 6 people, the check is 500 dollars, but Buckytom just stopped by for a drink or just ate a 8 dollar salad, we'll pay 100 bucks each and Buckytom will pay zero ;)
__________________
Kats
(www.onfoodanddrinks.com)
kats is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 07:03 PM   #38
Assistant Cook
 
kats's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: San Diego, CA, USA
Posts: 47
Ps:

Obviously, if I invited someone, I'll grab the check.
And if I go with my husband and a female friend (or my sister, his cousin etc.), we pay the check and don't let the single woman pay.
__________________
Kats
(www.onfoodanddrinks.com)
kats is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-26-2006, 10:48 PM   #39
Chef Extraordinaire
 
buckytom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: My mountain
Posts: 21,539
Quote:
Originally Posted by kats
For example, if we are in a group of 6 people, the check is 500 dollars, but Buckytom just stopped by for a drink or just ate a 8 dollar salad, we'll pay 100 bucks each and Buckytom will pay zero ;)
ok, so when and where should i meet you guys? is it ok if i get goat cheese and pignoli nuts, or at least a measly red pepper and anchovy on my salad?

hey wait a minute. i don't have to wash your cars or nothin', do i?
__________________
The past is gone it's all been said.
So here's to what the future brings,
I know tomorrow you'll find better things
buckytom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-27-2006, 12:00 AM   #40
Head Chef
 
Chopstix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Singapore
Posts: 1,323
From my experience in Asia, only one person usually picks up the tab at social situations. Splitting the bill is tantamount to quibbling over money and that is an awkward situation best avoided.

Normally the most senior person (in financial or social status) would pick up the bill, either because he is expected to, or he feels compelled to. If there are 2 senior-ranked persons in the group, it is normal to see a bill-snatching contest. To avoid scenarios like this, some people normally just surreptitiously pay the entire bill at the counter before the other party gets wind of it.

If the dinner is among good friends, say 2 couples or 2 friends, still only one party would normally insist to pay. It's enough for the other party to mention something about paying the next time. Then it's up to them to grab the tab next time.

So I guess the soft rule in Asia (from what I can tell) is that the senior-ranked person is expected to pay while among good friends there's a certain quid pro quo.

The only time people split the bill is when say, people who work together are eating lunch together. This is not considered a 'social' situation therefore no one is expected to foot the entire bill. Each pays his own.
__________________
'Never eat more than you can lift.' - Miss Piggy
Chopstix is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:03 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.