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Old 09-13-2021, 09:31 PM   #1
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Post Adventures With Mom

I'm starting this thread mostly for myself, to chronicle my Adventure With Mom.

Let me start from the beginning, my Mother had been having numerous issues at "The Home" as she called it. Her Senior Living Community back in her hometown, a very small town in California, where she has been for about 9 years, was in great dis-repair and had many problems.
Mainly, her landline was on the fritz more than it worked (and she has no cell phone nor did she want one), the AC kept going in and out and then to top things off her life-long Gal Pal had taken one too many tumbles and was moved in to her Son's home and her car keys got lost somehow, that was her only means of transport (read as her Son had hidden them).

THEN, throw in this whole Covid thing, GEEZ!

We were unable to make that 9 1/2 hour drive, one way, that we would take quarterly to visit my Mother, by request of the admin to "The Home'.

Mom was contacting me in any way possible to help her deal with business for her and I think she had finally had enough.

In one of our telephone conversations a acoupla months ago she said to me, "I think I made a big mistake moving here", with great distain in her voice.

That opened the door for me.
"Mom what would you think about moving here with us?"
She jumped at the offer.

We took a trip out to Cali to talk this out in person as a family (and take care of more mishaps at "The Home"). We all agreed that in a months time DH and I would come back out to collect her. This gave her plenty of time to purge what things she would no longer have a need for.

This is where I'm going to end this chapter of Adventures With Mom and I will continue this later, mainly `cuz it's time to get dinner on the table for us three ...

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Old 09-13-2021, 09:38 PM   #2
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...and don't forget dessert!
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Old 09-13-2021, 11:27 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Andy M. View Post
...and don't forget dessert!
But of course!
Mom claims to not care for sweets,
WELL!
She's had some sort of dessert every night since she's moved to Cowboyville AZ
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Old 09-14-2021, 11:40 AM   #4
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Kaneohegirlinaz, my heart goes out to you! Having gone thru much of this with my own mom (RIP) and now with my MIL, I can sympathize! I'll follow your chronicle.
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Old 09-14-2021, 06:44 PM   #5
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Post The Start Of A Very Long Day

My Dearest Husband, who is the best by the way, and I made yet another trek out to California to collect my Mother.

Mom had had 2 doctor's appointments that she cancelled so that we could head out to Arizona in a more timely manner. I think it was more like she wanted the heck outta there, the faster the better is what she said, "I'm sick of this place, let's GO!"

When we got to Mom's apartment, she had done a bang up job selling most of her things and made herself $500
Since the two bedrooms were cleared out, I thought ahead and made reservations at a hotel a few towns away.

Time to left for the last time!

We left fairly early so as to try to get a good head start on our 9 1/2 hour drive back to Arizona.
Mom was a trooper, let me tell you!
We had breakfast in the hotel right as they opened the free buffet. I had brought with us sandwich makings so that we could eat when and where we wanted to.
We stopped several times for Bathroom Breaks and then for a picnic lunch at a "nice for Arizona" rest stop. Most of them are pretty nasty, if they're even open!!!

Once we pulled into our driveway, everyone gave out an audible sigh!

Home again, home again, jiggity jig!

No one was very hunger so I put together my infamous Snack Plates for us three and a large glass of Wine for Mom & I and coffee for DH.

We all made an early night of it.
That was a very long day, but a necessary one.
As Mom was toddling off to her room, I said, "Welcome Home Mom"
"Thank you Baby. night-night"
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Old 09-15-2021, 01:30 AM   #6
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You've a lot on your plate and I hope you have the patience of Job. Best wishes at what is ahead. You are a good daughter
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Old 09-15-2021, 10:17 AM   #7
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I'm sure it gives you great peace of mind to have Mom with you!
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Old 09-15-2021, 01:29 PM   #8
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Post Welcome Home Mom

Before we left to collect my Mother from her hometown in small town California, I had clued in all of my Gal Pals.
They were so excited to meet her!
Before Mom even got here to Cowboyville, she had three social engagements on her calendar

Her first shindig was next door for Game Day.
As usual, I made snacks for the entire class to share.
Mom: What are doing?
Moi: I always take something whenever we're invited for Game Day
Mom: So what is it that you're making? Can I help you?

Aawwww!

As we walked in the front door of our next door neighbors, Missus hugs Mom and says, "Welcome Home Mom"

double aawwwww!

There was 7 of us all together and we played a sort of Trivia Pursuit game, Boom Again, loads of fun!
Mom got almost every single question right.
Mister Next Door Neighbor asks Mom, "Do you take anything for your memory? You're so sharp, just on it!"
Mom's team won by the way and we play for money

Mom: THAT was fun! When do we play again?
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Old 09-15-2021, 07:14 PM   #9
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That sounds so lovely and so fun for you and your mom.

The first time I played poker for money with my 20ish kids, I found out what card sharks they were. I had no idea! It was a blast.


When the youngest child was over 21 we took him gambling at the slot machines. When he won $50 dollars ahead of where he started, we bolted. I told him, THIS is the way to gamble, most people leave poorer, you left richer. Was so fun.
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Old 09-16-2021, 05:19 PM   #10
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Week Two

We made it to our second week having my Mother living with us in a 1500 square foot home.
It's a little tight, but Mom has her own room and bath. I made sure that DH understood that it was off-limits to him

I've been making sure that Mom is eating well, because honestly, both DH and I think that she has not. She's far to thin and frail, her maneuverability is dicey and she's just about taken a few spills with us already.
DH and I have come to the conclusion that Mom
should not
be living on her own any longer.

We had talked about buying a small home nearby to our place and renting it back to her, but we don't think that's going to work.
We haven't discussed this new twist with her as yet. Our thoughts are to let her get settled first. That was a pretty big change for her to leave her hometown and come here with us two.

Actually, this her 3rd big move as an adult.
First was leaving Hawaii for Southern Arizona.
Second move was back to her hometown that she left when she was 17 years old.
Now this third one back to AZ ... phew!
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Old 09-16-2021, 05:29 PM   #11
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I agree, if Mom is as frail as you think, she needs to be around help and someone to encourage her to eat. You are doing great, as far as I can see.
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Old 09-16-2021, 06:10 PM   #12
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I 2nd PF's words! Trust me, it is so much easier just to let time pass and keep her with you than to try and get her to move back again! If she's got any of that stubborn independence stuff that my Mom and my MIL have!

I just wouldn't bring it up, unless she does. Chances are, deep down, she knows she should just stay put. But she may worry over being a "bother" or cramping your style or something silly.

Of course, my advice is likely worth about as much as you paid for it! Or, your mileage may vary?

If there are some little tasks you can delegate to her, so much the better. Or, maybe there's a hobby or something she used to do that you might encourage?
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Old 09-16-2021, 07:07 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneohegirlinaz View Post
We made it to our second week having my Mother living with us in a 1500 square foot home.
It's a little tight, but Mom has her own room and bath. I made sure that DH understood that it was off-limits to him

I've been making sure that Mom is eating well, because honestly, both DH and I think that she has not. She's far to thin and frail, her maneuverability is dicey and she's just about taken a few spills with us already.
DH and I have come to the conclusion that Mom
should not
be living on her own any longer.

We had talked about buying a small home nearby to our place and renting it back to her, but we don't think that's going to work.
We haven't discussed this new twist with her as yet. Our thoughts are to let her get settled first. That was a pretty big change for her to leave her hometown and come here with us two.

Actually, this her 3rd big move as an adult.
First was leaving Hawaii for Southern Arizona.
Second move was back to her hometown that she left when she was 17 years old.
Now this third one back to AZ ... phew!
I should have also said that our initial proposal to Mom to move from California to Arizona was that we would purchase a place and then rent that back to her, at a reduced rate that she didn't need to know about.
There's a great "Active 55+ Community" close to us and she liked it there, but... As DH said to me, "What's the point? We'd be going back and forth multiple times a day, why not just keep her here in our house?"
Makes perfect sense to me.
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Old 09-17-2021, 04:11 PM   #14
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Post More Social Engagements

Missus Next-door Neighbor invited my Mother and I over for an afternoon of Mexican Train with the rest of our Gal Pal's so that they could met Mom.
Mom asked me, "Isn't that like dominos?"
Yupper Mom!
And as usual, I made a sweet treat to take along, small Jell-O cups with Whipped Cream, MMM!

Mom: well, where did you find those little disposable cups and spoons?
Moi: Dollar Tree
Mom: Oh, I love that place, I haven't been to one in ages. Can we go one day?
Moi: Sure Mom

Mom had so much fun
AND WON!
We play for cash, $5 each player, and we play until a pre-determined time ... when one of us needs to skedaddle back home.

When we got home Mom hands me back my five bucks, I told her to keep it and pay for lunch the next go around.
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Old 09-17-2021, 04:24 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneohegirlinaz View Post
Missus Next-door Neighbor invited my Mother and I over for an afternoon of Mexican Train with the rest of our Gal Pal's so that they could met Mom.
Mom asked me, "Isn't that like dominos?"
Yupper Mom!
And as usual, I made a sweet treat to take along, small Jell-O cups with Whipped Cream, MMM!

Mom: well, where did you find those little disposable cups and spoons?
Moi: Dollar Tree
Mom: Oh, I love that place, I haven't been to one in ages. Can we go one day?
Moi: Sure Mom

Mom had so much fun
AND WON!
We play for cash, $5 each player, and we play until a pre-determined time ... when one of us needs to skedaddle back home.

When we got home Mom hands me back my five bucks, I told her to keep it and pay for lunch the next go around.
Sounds like a great day. One to treasure! Do you ever make Deluxe Whipped Jello? I don't see it around much. I learned to make it in Jr. High School Home Ec class. Long, long time ago! Jello and Ice Cream! If you don't know it, but would like to, holler and I'll type it out. It will be easier to read than my "original" instructions from then!
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Old 09-17-2021, 07:04 PM   #16
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Jell-O and Ice Cream?
I've never heard of that before Ginny
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Old 09-17-2021, 07:30 PM   #17
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Click image for larger version

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Recipe makes about 7, 5 oz servings.
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Old 09-18-2021, 03:55 PM   #18
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I sent away for a free Knox gelatin cookbook. One of the recipes was for ice cream and canned peaches, with gelatin dissolved into the peach syrup. The whole thing went in the food processor or blender. Then, it was poured into bowls. It made a really nice mousse desert that set up in about an hour, because of the cold ice cream.
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Old 09-18-2021, 05:31 PM   #19
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That sounds yummy, taxlady.

I hope we aren't cluttering up your Adventures With Mom thread!!!

Here's that ancient recipe from Mrs. Horowitz Home Ec Class...and never seen anywhere again...to the best of my knowledge!

Deluxe Whipped Jello

1/3 cup flavored gelatin (I like the mixed fruit red one or strawberry)
1 cup boiling water
4-5 ice cubes
1 pint vanilla ice cream, softened

Simply, dissolve gelatin in boiling water. Cool, add ice cubes & stir until mixture begins to thicken. Remove any remaining ice.

Then, beat gelatin mixture with rotary beater (we used a manual beater...ha, ha) until frothy. Add ice cream & beat until well blended.

Last, pour into individual serving containers & chill until set. I usually use old Tupperware dessert dishes. They hold about 5 ounces and this will make about 7 of them. But one could use the disposable kind too, from Chefs' Store or something similar.
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Old 09-18-2021, 06:02 PM   #20
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Post Mom's Favorite Past Time

I may have made mention in other threads over the years,
my Mother really does not cook and she also does not care
to grocery shop.

Mom's favorite past time is dining out.
Pre-Corona Virus Mom and her Life-long Gal Pal (who still drove)
went out to eat 3-4 times per week.
Mom figured that by doing this, she always had leftovers in the
`fridge and didn't have to bother with anything but a
quick heat up in the micro, rinse her dish and into the
automatic dishwasher

I'm the complete opposite.

I love grocery shopping, I spend hours in one store.
I love to cook, bake, grill, home can, you name it!
I do enjoy the occasional meal that someone else has
prepared and cleaned up after.

I gotta tell y'all that my Mother has been lovin' the restaurant scene
here in Cowboyville.
I've made up a list of places to take her to and she's game
to try anything. I've even enlisted my Gal Pals to tell me their go-to joints. When we ask Mom what she'd like to eat,
she just says "Surprise me."
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