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[chefmaloney]

It was an unusually bumpy flight and we had to make an emergency landing in TimBuckToo where the airline put us all up at the Timbuck Four Seasons Hotel.

 

[QSis]

Legend has it that the hotel is haunted by the ghosts of celebrities who have stayed there.

 

[getoutamykitchen]

As I settled in my hotel room and was almost asleep, I heard a very faint knocking on my hotel room door.

 

[QSis]

I opened the door just a crack, and saw standing there, with martinis in hand, Gregory Peck, Cary Grant, Bette Davis and Joan Crawford.

 

[pdswife]

Hello, they all cried at once as they stepped in my door and handed me a kaluha and cream.

 

[QSis]

Cary swept me into his arms and started to dance me around the floor, calling me "Judy" the whole time.

 

[chefmaloney]

Bette just stood in the doorway smoking like it was her last cigarette saying something about 'writing a letter to daddy' and 'hanging on tight----bumpy ride' ---
couldn't get the rest.

 

[getoutamykitchen]

Suddenly I heard Joan shout, " Three hundred dollar dresses on wire hangers."

 

[chefmaloney]

When I woke up I was home in my own bed and some ghastly woman was standing over me holding a flower of garlic in one hand, a pot holder in the other saying "oy, kvetch, I see you are awake now darlink, and how about I should give to you some nice chicken soup?"

 

[africhef]

Problem is I was now lost and without transportation.

 

[pdswife]

not knowing where I was I decided to go to the internet and google maps.

 

[getoutamykitchen]

As I searched the internet for my whereabouts I asked myself, "What is a Google anyway?"

 

[chefmaloney]

After seaching through all 2,335,564,000 results I was more confused than ever and decided to forget about google and look up a recipe for roast duck with orange sauce.

 

[pdswife]

It said to preheat my oven to 350 but... I don't have an oven so I decided to drive to Burger king instead.

 

[getoutamykitchen]

I knew when I got there that they would hold the pickles, hold the lettuce, special orders won't upset them, all they ask is that I let them serve it my way, but did I have what it takes to handle a whopper, the two fisted burger, at Burger King.

(Good golly, I love this thread)

 

[africhef]

It was obvious to the staff that the whopper was to much of a whopper, plus they did not like serving foot traffic.

 

[getoutamykitchen]

So I left disgusted thinking, "my foots are just as good as anybody elses foots, why don't they like serving foot traffic?"

 

[africhef]

This was a riddle that I could not solve, but knew of a lion in the wetlands that could steer me in the right direction.

 

[getoutamykitchen]

But when I got there I heard... in the wetlands, the mighty wetlands, the lion sleeps tonight, aweema whip, aweema whip, aweema whip, aweema whip.

 

[africhef]

Annoyed at this turn of events, I very rudely prodded this lazy lion awake, and started singing in my awful voice.