Hospitality

[Claire]

If you have a home where people gather, what do you think makes them come there? Don't let this scare you, if you find yourself at a certain pal's place, tell us what attracts you to that place.

 

[Maidrite]

Loyal, True, Genuine,Comfortable,Caring atmospheres. A True Friend will do everything possible never to let you down but will let you know if you step out of bounds in a tactful, caring way! One needs to feel welcome most of all ! People are asked what do you have to offer. All I have is Heart plain and simple.

 

[GB]

Comfortable seats

 

[Sandyj]

Relaxed hosts who have fun, too.

 

[licia]

We certainly don't have a problem having company. Family and friends are here quite often. Yesterday I had a tea for my neighbor, her daughter and 22 month old grandaughter. The most important thing for me is to have everything done ahead so you are enjoying yourself without any other work. We try to keep our home comfortable and clean, but not fussy, interesting but not busy. I suppose what we strive for is homey and hospitable. We have about 50 people out a couple of times a year - and part of it is outside. I try not to have a vast menu, but plenty of what we have and it seems to work.

 

[Alix]

My parents home used to be the gathering place for all of my friends, and I learned from her how to entertain.

Rule #1 - Put out lots of food and drink. Serve the first round, then tell everyone to help themselves, and remind them as needed.

Rule #2 - Mingle and laugh. If the hostess is having fun, so is everyone else.

Rule #3 - DON'T CLEAN UP WHILE YOUR GUESTS ARE THERE! Sit and party with them.

I took to heart what my Mom told me. Keep the house tidy enough to not gross people out when they come over, but untidy enough that they feel comfy putting up their feet and staying for a while.

 

[pdswife]

I love entertaining. I think my friends know that and so they feel very welcome.
I try to have almost everything done by the time they arrive but I know a few of my friends really like to help out so, I leave a few things for them to do.

Alex your # 3 rule is right!
I used to clean up while people were still there
and then one night our best friends were here and
I was putting dishes in the dish washer.. Rob came in to the kitchen
and said "what, the dishes are more fun than US??" I'd never really thought
about how cleaning up would make others feel. Now I leave the mess and
enjoy my company.

 

[Alix]

Yes, I wish I could remember who told me that people came to see ME not my clean house. And that a hostess who actually visits with her guests is remembered more than one who has an immaculate kitchen. I tried to karma you pdswife, but I have to spread the love first!

 

[mudbug]

I think it was me, Alix. And you told me I could put my feet up on your dog.

 

[Alix]

RIIIIGHT!! And I will of course provide the tape roller for you to remove said dog hair as you leave.

 

[mudbug]

As any gracious and lovely hostess would! Having two dogs, we provide free dog hair as part of the experience.

 

[bknox]

I was raised in the south and I think it is probably that one of the first things I ask guests is "Have you eaten". Then I make something to eat. If they have eaten or not.

That and providing a calm, friendly atmosphere.

Bryan

 

[Sandyj]

I had to laugh about the dog hair...us too.
I agree with the things all have said here. I've made all the mistakes too. DH and I love having people around, and we ofen have a houseful. Lots of our friends are from other countries, so it's always an interesting mix. My eldest daughter said something nice to me, though...she said her friends actually spoke about this and they agreed that our house is the most welcoming (to them), and they really enjoy coming to visit and meeting our friends. That felt good.

 

[Alix]

Wow Sandyj, high praise indeed! Kids know where they are accepted and where they are just tolerated. How wonderful to know you have the kind of place where everyone wants to return.

 

[Barbara L]

As any gracious and lovely hostess would! Having two dogs, we provide free dog hair as part of the experience.

LOL We couldn't wear black clothes for 14 years (that is how long we had our dog Baby!)

Barbara

 

[mudbug]

That is highly gratifying, Sandyj. I overheard my daughter and her friends agreeing the other day that daughter has a "cool dad." He is the principal chaperone for the many basement parties around here.

 

[pdswife]

Yes, I wish I could remember who told me that people came to see ME not my clean house. And that a hostess who actually visits with her guests is remembered more than one who has an immaculate kitchen. I tried to karma you pdswife, but I have to spread the love first!

Well, karma thoughts are just as nice!! Thank you!

 

[Sandyj]

Good for you mudbug! May it always be that way! You'd be surprised (or, sadly, maybe you wouldn't because you've seen it, too) how many parents don't want the kids around.

 

[mudbug]

Oh no. They can grind all the chips they want into the carpet. Spill drinks everywhere. Forget their shoes until next week. At least I know where they are!

 

[lindatooo]

When my son was growing up I would always rather he be home with his friends than elsewhere so I generally had a housefull! One of his friends would even clean the house for me occasionally! What a treat!

I agree with the not cleaning up part - sometimes I have to staple my MIL into her seat but that is something I like to do alone. And, funny thing, the guests leave but the dishes have never put themselves away!