Is this bad manners?.... your thoughts?

[TxNorma]

This one is in the "ify" category. If it's not rude, it's darned close! The RUDEST dinner invite I've encountered though was when friends invited us for dinner at 8, along with our toddler, and knowing that the now-ex and I had to be at work at 5 a.m. the following morning. When we arrived, we were offered drinks...nice.......then after about 45 minutes of chatting, the woman excused herself to the kitchen, than called me in, and was pulling the meat out of the FREEZER, and wanted to know how long it would take to thaw!!! She than proceeded to send the guys to the store, to pick up veggies! Her husband was FURIOUS with her, and extremely embarrassed. Needless to say, dinners with that couple became meeting at restaurants!!!

 

[Dina]

I think being specific about asking someone to be there early for appetizers/drinks would be the way to go about it. Everyone's customs are different and when you invite someone to your home it's to welcome them whether they're early, on time or late for whatever reason.

 

[mudbug]

I like it when my guests arrive early. I interpret it to mean that they are looking forward to being with us.

 

[Claire]

I'm with Mish ... tell people what time you want them to arrive. I always tell people an hour or so before "sitting down" time. Then we have drinks, maybe an appetizer, and discuss life. This gives me some leverage to finish dinner. Often some friends/family will sit in the kitchen with me while I do last minute work while hubby holds court in the living room. I never, ever, ever tell people to come to the house and expect to sit down immediately. Always give them at least an hour earlier. Yes, it is rude to be late. But be a realistic host. At least an hour before sit-down-to-supper time. What us drinkers call cocktail hour. But don't tell THEM that. If you want folk to sit down at 7, tell them to arrive at 6. As an always early-bird with chronically late friends, I've learned this works on both sides.